Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Update - October 31, 2007. Monster Chiller Coronation Horror Street

Okay, kids. I've got a scary movie for you tonight. It's called "The Major Mystery of the Missing Morris Minor." Oooh, scary stuff, kids.

Becky awakens alone in the woody somewhere out on the windy moors. She gets out and screams for the onomastically named Slug.

Meanwhile at the café Roy is beside himself as Hayley tries to calm him down. He's worried that some kids may have stolen the car in an effort to take a joy ride, then destroy, as is often the case.

Back on the moors, Slug reappears with two teas. Becky is stricken with remorse. Last night, she was drunk and having a laugh. In the morning, she's a car thief and not at work. She knows Roy and Hayley will suspect her.

Slug says he didn't hear her moaning last night. Well, maybe a little, he admits. How can anyone resist this rakish charm?

The two continue to argue until Slug takes off in the car, taking Becky's nice new coat with him. Becky is now freezing, alone, and a long way from Coronation Street.

When she finally gets back to Roy's Rolls, Roy and Hayley ask her if she saw anyone suspicious. She tries to play offended, saying that she isn't to blame for everything that goes bent around here. Roy and Hayley back off a little.

The police call and tell Roy that the car has been found with only the wiring tampered with and no other apparent damage.

When he returns, he is visible angry. He pulls Becky's nice new white coat out of his bag and asks if she can explain it. She tries to blame it on Slug but they won't hear it. She is sacked on the spot.

Later at the Rover's, Hayley is seething at the betrayal. Becky comes and tries to make amends but Hayley angrily tells her that she's run out of chances, that she's played them for mugs, and that they never want to see her again. Roy tells her that she's just lost a very good friend.

Wasn't that a scary movie, kids? I had goosebumps, just thinking about it. Roy probably didn't even have car insurance. That's scary. Ok, maybe it wasn't so scary. But I promise this next film will definitely scare you. It called, "The Tale of the Murderous Mummy."

At the Council of the Elder Barlows, the usual topic of the Trouble with Tracy is being addressed. They have rounded on Tracy for her behaviour last night.

"Scandalous!" declares Blanche.

Ken thinks she should lay low before the trial. Deirdre tells her that her behaviour has an affect on the people around her.

As if by cue, Amy walks in.

"Bethany," Tracy says. "What are you doing here? Go home to your mum, Sarah now."

Ok she didn't say that.

Tracy grabs Amy and says she's taking her out and tells her parents not to wait for her.

She runs into Kelly and Joanne. Kelly makes a few remarks about the stamina it takes to go out drinking the night before then take her kids out the next day. Tracy takes offense to this and Kelly gets all up in her grill (she even shakes head her slightly from side to side so you know she means business). The confrontation fizzles out as Joanne remarks that Tracy could start a row in an empty house.

When she returns, she is upset to see that the Council of the Elder Barlows have started lunch without her. Ken notes that if they tried to keep her schedule, they'd never eat. Way to show backbone Ken. You'll remember how you stood up to your murderous daughter when you're 93 years old and still paying back that mortgage.

Tracy claims she met a nice man last night who knows nothing of her past and she plans to call him after she takes a nap.

Oh, that Tracy Barlow! She's frightening the way she sneers at you! How she goes out drinking every night when she's on trial for murder! Our next scary movie is called "Other Scary Stuff That Happened On The Street!" Awooooo!!!

Joanne dumped Adam by text. She still thinks Liam is her boyfriend. Liam is offering "overtime," which is his code for Chica-bam.

Sonny came back from Dublin with gifts for Michelle and made dinner for the Connors. Michelle's prick brothers decided he passes the test in their books. Sonny? Still nice.

Jason, despite working like a dog on the new fast food shop in Diggory's old place, found time to buy Sarah a nice bracelet for her birthday and make sure they can go out to dinner at the local restaurant.

Steve and Jamie traded notes on who's the biggest loser. Jamie has to pay rent on his house and has no job. And dated his mother. Steve repels Michelle and lives with his mother. I'd say it's a draw but it does highlight why Joanne is hanging out with Liam. He's the best of a very bad lot round there.

The Howl-a-ween Update

halloween-dog-costumes

Okay, yeah....I just wanted a cheap excuse to post cute pictures of dogs in costumes.

Night Flyers!!! OOOOOO Scarey!!!
David is being probably the creepiest of creeps right now, demanding that Tracey 'be nice' to him. He approaches her on the street and asks her if she is avoiding him. She says of course not and he reminds her that she needed to be 'nice' to him.

Tracey flat out tells him that this is as 'nice' as she gets and he tells her to try harder to be 'nice'. So, she breaks into Charlie's old house and grabs a car stereo hoping that this will suffice for 'nice'. She gives it to David who agrees that it's 'nice' and accepts it. I suspect though, it won't be 'nice' enough and if 'nice' is what we're all suspecting it is, I'm going to need therapy or at least some meditation techniques to get through the next few episodes.

Later on, a very odd scene occurs in the Barlow. Tracey tells Diedre she needs money (to buy Amy clothes), Deidre gives her the money and Ken rolls his eyes. The only remarkable part of this scene is the fact that Ken is still able to stand after having surgery to remove his backbone in 1992.

On the street, Tracey is confronted by Claire who gives her some pamphlets on spousal abuse because, 'Knowledge is Power!'. Tracey is forced to step inside the Peacock home for some tea and flyers. As she leaves the house, Emily gives her what seems to be some kind of Watchtower article with an interview of a woman who was abused for years and ended up killing her husband. Tracey puts on her bravest 'Farah Fawcett in 'The Burning Bed'' face.

Armed with a fist full of flyers and cut outs, Tracey marches down the street, empowered and ready to take on the world! It is here that we discover that Weatherfield does in fact recycle its paper products.

So in the end, Tracey in fact, does not go Baby Gap, but rather to the Rovers where she sees Dev and sits with him. They have a few laughs until Tracey asks Dev to take her into town, which he isn't willing to do. Tracey becomes more intoxicated and when Claire comes in for a drink, Sean suggests that she go talk to Miss Demeanor who is now fallen over on the bench.

Claire *tries* to talk some sense into her, but it's no use. Finally, Ken and Deidre walk in and gaze upon the drunken spectacle that is their daughter on-bail.

Let's say it together, shall we?

'Oh, Traaa-ceh!'

Yes, they are disappointed and quite frankly *SHOCKED* that Tracey would behave like this. Deidre finally has to come to grips with the ugly truth. 'Waiiiiiiiiit a minute, that 40 quid I gave you, that wasn't for Amy's clothes at all was it?' That money was used for drinking, wasn't it?

Bingo, give the lady a monkey on a stick.

Faced with parental judgement, Tracey flees the Rovers and hails a taxi. Glacia is convinced at this point that Tracey, realizing now how good she had it, is on her way back to jail.

Alas no, she's off to some club because, as she tells Ken and Deidre, 'I want to live! I want to LIVE!!!!!!'

Frankly, if I were Tracey, I'd be taking up vodka as a religion.

Attack of the Giant Slug
knight dog

Haley and Roy are admiring their new car and Becky comes over to inspect. While they are on the other side of the car, she points out some dent in the car. Haley rushes over, only to find out that Becky was having them on a bit. Roy's face looks as if 8.3 months have officially been removed from his life expectancy.

At the end of the day, Roy invites Becky over for dinner, but she declines saying that she's a bit tired and wants to just go get some rest. In reality, she's going over to the pub to meet up with Slug.

Let's see....Slug somehow seduces her into not only meeting him, but in buying him another drink, he makes fun of her employment situation and then suggest that they get a kebab as he gives her knee a squeeze suggesting that she be 'nice' to him that evening.

Well, not since Brendan Fraiser won my heart in 'Mrs.Winterbourne' have I been left so completely breathless over man as the romantic figure on the screen. Who could resist?

Certainly not Becky, that's for sure. She traipses off with him, reminiscing about all the good times they've had committing a series of felonies. One such memory is how they stole someone's car and wrapped it around tree.

Sooooooooo, Slug suggest that they do it again for old time's sake. Becky agrees and walks towards a random car on the street. Of course, this is not the car that Slug wants and he manages to convince Becky to steal the Cropper's car. The last we see of them is driving away, laughing madly.

Oh Becky, Becky, Becky.....why? Why do follow the advice of someone named 'Slug' for goodness sake? Are you really that thick?

Amityville Factory
bananadogs
Karla is having some troubles with her orders and uses the office for some privacy while she sorts it on. Paul and Liam try to offer their support by saying, 'Well, at least you tried.', then they giggle.

Okay, officially in Glacia's books, they are pricks.

Liam gives Joanne a hard time when she comes in because she's late and tells her to get right to work and forget about lunch. MWAHAHAAHAHAA!

He later tries to win her back after hours by offering himself up for a bit of fun and games with no strings attached. (read: a roll in the hay in exchange for a bag of chips and six pack of Bacardi Breezers.). He also makes some cheeky comment about her being 'into' factory owners.

She ends up kissing him, which I'm kind of disappointed in. He's terribly cute, but he clearly doesn't think of her as date worthy (i.e. taking her to Luigi's for a slice, let alone 'The Clock'.), so why should she be with him? Glacia is certainly no prude, and affairs can be fun, but when it's boss/employee, it's entering dangerous territory. Plus she's too pretty and nice to be just a Breezersletje*.

Oh yeah, Adam made it out of the washing machine long enough to have a rather uncomfortable chat with Jo on the street. The upshot is, he's just been 'whew! just soooooooooo swamped right now and hey, maybe if she's not busy later they can go to to the chippy or sommit.' I forget what her response was, but it ended with Adam kissing her on the cheek. I wonder if they are going to officially break up, or let this die a slow painful death.

BTW - did anyone else notice the 'Jack' graffiti on the lockers? Surely they don't' mean Jack Duckworth.

The Curse of the P.E. Strip
oompaloompa
Chesney is on his way to school, but Fiz notices that he hasn't got his P.E. strip with him, so she rushes home to get it for him. Luckily, Ches makes his escape when the bus arrives. We see her come around the corner only to have Chesney waving to her from the back of the bus, reminiscent of that scene in Indianan Jones.

*New Dutch word I learned yesterday.

Morris Minor Sighting

Last night, I was on my way to my litle Italian tailor to pick up a pair of newly hemmed trousers for my freakishly short legs when I spotted something.

A brown Morris Minor, with a right-hand drive and Ontario plates, was sitting right there in my neighbourhood. I whipped out my camera phone to take a photo to post here and ...

the phone decided it just didn't want to take pictures. But I swear, it was right there. Damn it.

No sign of Becky or Slug, though.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Sometimes I Love Art




In the comments section below (two posts ago) I mentioned that Gail once attacked Eileen in the street after Todd came out the closet. It was a golden Corrie moment and totally hilarious. I found this picture on the interweb. Yes, Gail is the one in the bathrobe. Look at it. Love it. Let it inspire you.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Update for Episode #6482 October 29, 2007

Michelle and Steve and Sonny and Sean

Steve is sat at the bar making googly eyes at Michelle. Pleasant small talk is exchanged betwen the two. Daddy Warbucks - aka Sonny - shows up to tell Michelle that he dreadfully sorry but he will have break the plans they have made, as he has to nip off to Dublin for some sort of important business meeting. A joke is made about Sonny taking his chopper for the trip to the emerald isle, but he admits that he will be flying on one of those ubiquitious 10 pound flights prevalent in the UK these days. Sonny gives the beateous beer puller a snog farewell.

Sean pops in to say hello and meet Sonny, but again has missed meeting Michelle's main man. Steve tells Sean that Sonny at present is circling Dublin in his chopper.

Sean comments that Dublin is a long way to go on a motorbike.

Fiz and Cilla

Fiz and Kirk pop in to the pub for a drink, although Fiz is loudly protesting the idea since she is skint due to Chesney eating her out of house and home. Kirk, stand up guy that he is, stands her a shandy.

Cilla comes in and and has some heated words with her daughter about their respective philosophies about mothering. In the end they agree to disagree about what methodology is best.

Roy and Hayley and Becky and Slug

The denizens of the cafe are discussing the tidy sum Roy received for selling his comic collection and ray gun - and what to do with the windfall. Becky says she would go on holiday if she came into some money. Hayley giggles and tells her that they have an idea of what they will do with the cash - and is does have something to do with being a 'traveller'.

It turns out that there is a car for sale that has piqued the interest of the Croppers - a 1971 Morris Minor Traveller*. Roy and Hayley stop by the garage to ask Kev what he thinks of the idea. Kev tells them it is difficult to form an opinion from a piece of paper, but would be happy to take a look at the car in person when the owner brings it round for a look.

Right about then Slug saunters up the street to visit Becky in the cafe. He tries to buy a coffee and a doughnut but even though he has cash in hand Becky screeches at him to get out.

Later Becky is outside taking a fag break and flirts with Jason who is doing some work across the road. Slug sees this litle interchange and wonders why Becky is being so rude to him, and then goes on about how boring Becky has become since she started working at the cafe, and how it is important to be nice to people on the way up, because you might a friend on the way down. Slug asks Becky out for a drink. One drink. Anytime that is good for her.

Make it arsenic she says - and I'll buy.

The owner of the Morris shows up with the car. Hayley and Roy are in a tizzy about how wonderful the car is. Becky thinks an Audi TT would offer more adventure - but you would have a tough time finding one for 1500 pounds. Roy tells the owner of the car he can have some refreshments in the cafe - on the house. Kev tells them that it might not be the best choice for driving on the M6 every day, but it would be great for the Sundat afternoon pootle.

Roy and Hayley decide to offer the asking price for the car.

*Designed by Sir Alec Issigonis, perhaps best known for creating the Austin Mini.

Tracey and David

Deirdre hugs David in the street (more psychological damage inflicted) and tells him that he is worth his weight in gold for his testimony.

Steve stops by the Barlows to drop off Amy's stuffed monkey. Tracey is grateful for him having taken care of Amy while she was inside. Steve says it was no problem at all and would be happy to take care of Amy again in case...

Awkward moment. Tracey insists she will not be going to prison. Steve wonders if they should talk about what will happen if she does. Tracey gets bitchy. Steve decides to go, since everything he says is coming out wrong.

Later Steve stops by to apologize and do some sucking up to Tracey. She wonders where Amy's stuffed bunny is. Steve is sure it isn't round his place. Tracey realizes that the bunny is still across the street - in the house of Charlie.

Tracey announces to her parents that she is going to go over to the scene of the crime to retrieve some of her belongings. Deirdre is suitably horrified. Ken, glancing up from his Guardian, reminds her of her bail conditions. In a moment of legal logic, Tracey rebuts with 'I don't care - it's my stuff and I want it back.'

Deirdre and Tracey make their way across the street and go into the unguarded and police tape free crime scene. David watches them from his car. Inside Deirdre and Tracey have another of their odd mother/daughter interactions. Tracey wonders what will happen to all the items in the house, noting that Blanche would like the 32" TV. Tracey goes on about how it was her dream home, and how she had devoted her whole life to him. (is it just me or were Tracey and Charlie living together for only a fairly short time?) Deirdre goes home after a while, leaving Tracey alone in the house for a bit.

David pops in, giving Tracey quite a fright. He makes an insightful comment about Tracey returning to the scene of the crime. She bleats something about her innocence and self defence and all that. David wonders if she had manipulated him earlier when they had a discussion about what he saw through the kitchen window. He asks Tracey to recount what happened the day Charlie died - he wants to hear all the gory details from her directly. David even pretends to be Charlie so they can re-enact the crime. Tracey continues to protest her innocence.

David tells Tracey that the more he thinks about it, the more he believes that Tracey killed Charlie deliberately.

'Listen Miss Marple, you are way off beam' snaps back Tracey. David tells her that he just wants to help, that he just wants the truth to come out about what happened.

In the end though he betrays his true intentions and asks Tracey 'what's in it for me?'

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Update- Friday, October 26, 2007- (Almost) "The Worse Business Deal Ever"

The scene opens with Becky loading up the trunk of a car with the goods that Roy and Hayley gave her. Meanwhile, Roy is talking to Dev about the value of the ray gun, when in walks a young woman, looking for Charlie Stubbs. Dev tries to chat her up, but she does not bite. Becky then happily leaves with Roy and Hayley's objects for the car boot sale.

Later, Roy is in a tizzy because Becky took the comic books and ray gun. He tries to get first Hayley and then Sarah to look after the caf while he goes to retrieve them. Neither of them will do it, and he keeps getting worked up, speculating that Becky knew the value of them and took them on purpose, knowing that Roy didn't want them to go (So unfair. I mean, it's been weeks since she stole from them.)

Eventually Becky returns, empty handed, wearing a new coat and very pleased about the success of the sale. Roy, trying to remain calm, asks if everything was sold. Becky says that almost everything was sold. She tells the story of the comic books. Some guy came by and wanted to pay 20 punds for them, but she could tell by the way he was acting that they were worth a lot more, so she bargained her way up to 40 pounds! "Forty pounds," Roy repeats faintly. But, she adds, he only had a cheque. At that point the cab driver comes in with the comic books and ray gun. Becky won't take cheques, so in the end the comic books and ray gun weren't sold. She does have the man's business card. Becky gives it to Roy, and suggest he could get a bit more for them.

We then see Roy on the phone with the guy. He ends the call, and informs Becky that the whole lot, including the ray gun, could be worth 1,500 pounds. Becky is beside herself with delight, and as so often happens when someone on the street gets excited, I couldn't understand one word of what she said.


A Stranger Calls

The mysterious woman leaves the Caf and goes to the Rovers. Dev is there and now, along with trying to chat her up, tries to figure out what connection she has to Charlie Stubbs. She confirms that she is no relation to him (she has no horns after all), but won't reveal anything else. She asks Dev for his newspaper, which he obligingly gives, and she passes it on to her grandfather. Dev tells her his name, but she won't tell him his.

She then goes to see Jason, as Roy told her Jason was running the yard. She doesn't think Jason is up to the task of renovating Diggory Compton's shop, as he clearly has his hands full with a wailing Holly. As she paid Charlie up front, and nothing has been done on the place, she wants her money back. This is the point where Jason should turn matters over to whomever is responsible for intestate estates. But he doesn't. He just assures her he will be able to work on the shop.

Later on Jason is walking by Diggory's and the woman comes out. He talks to her for a bit, and it turns out she will be selling chips and so much more! She leaves, Hayley comes by, and Jason tells her that a new fast food place is opening up. Hayley says that will make Roy's day even worse.

The woman goes back to the Rover's to get her grandfather. Her grandfather calls Dev, "chief", and Dev thinks the man is being racist. The woman says he is not, and Dev and she are now off on the wrong foot.

Dr. Evil and Mini-Me

At the Barlows', Ken warns Tracy not to talk to David, as it could be seen as interfering with a witness. Tracy, always compliant, goes to Gail's house, and knocks on the door. But there is no one home.

Tracy goes from Gail's to the Salon to find David. When he is not there, she tries to dig for information from Sarah and Audrey. They confirm that he was in the back garden, and says he saw everything.

Meanwhile, David and Gail are in the police station being interviewed. David goes into some detail about the knives and what he heard. He finishes his story off by saying that all was quiet. The police repeat, "All was quiet?" and David catches himself. Except the music.

Tracy continues to wait for David, and is anxious, but Ken and Deirdre try and calm her down.

At the Salon, Audrey questions Maria about why she didn't tell anyone about David being nearly drowned by Charlie. Maria says she was trying to protect David. Granted, this does not really make any sense, but Audrey goes on to tell Maria that she was leading David on, which is uncalled for.

Back at the police station, the police want to know why David did not say anything before. David tells them he was scared, especially when it wasn't clear whether or not Charlie would survive. He tells them about the time Charlie tried to drown him, and the time that he threw him in the back of his van, and further tells them that Maria witnessed the first event, and Liam, the second.

When David and Gail return home, David tells Maria that he told the police "everything" and that they will be speaking with her.

And so they do. Cute-accent police officer speaks with Maria, and the woman detective speaks with Liam. Liam confirms David's story.

Tracy finally gets a chance to speak with David. She tries to find out what he said, and David says that he told the police he saw everything. Tracy, thinking that David did actually see everything, tries to explain herself, but luckily doesn't give herself away, as David then states that he saw Charlie coming at her with a knife. As they are speaking the woman detective leaves Underworld. Tracy, realizing that maybe, just maybe it won't look good for her to speak with David, takes him to his house, where they go over his story. She helpfully fills in some blanks for him. At the end of it, David reassures Tracy that he is on "her side" as he too hated Charlie. She is relieved, but warns him not to let her down, as otherwise they will both be in a lot of trouble.

Joanne, Meet Snake, Snake, Meet Joanne

Joanne is called into Liam's office. Liam tells her that he had a "bite of the apple" and now wants to finish it. She tells him she has a boyfriend and shouldn't be doing this. So he backs off and says that he was out of line, but she was just so luscious. He promises it won't happen again, at which point Joanne kisses him.

Yep, just like in Eden, it appears that the woman is going to be the one who takes the blame when this all goes to hell.

Obscure Football Reference of the Day

In the epiosde last night Hayley and Jason were chatting in front of the old Diggory Compton bakery. Inside the white washed window of the bakery someone had written 'MUFC' - Manchester United Football Club.

If anyone wants to read a good summary of the Manchester City and Manchester United rivalry the current issue of '442' has an excellent article outlining the history between the two Mancunian clubs.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Update - Thursday, October 25, 2007 - Creep of the Week

I'm watching you.

At the Platt household, Sarah says to Gail that David is lying. Gail says she will talk to him and make sure he knows it will be in front of a judge. Sarah says he could get done for perjury. Audrey asks Gail if she wants her to talk to David but she says no. David listens to them from the kitchen table.

Outside on the street, Ken asks Gail if there are any new developments. She says David is saying the same thing but will let him know as soon as she has talked to him. He thanks her and goes, Gail looks around to talk to David and he disappears.

David is outside Number Six in the back garden and the place looks like a tornado hit it. Gail comes out the yard asking what he is doing. He says he is just looking at the flat as “Charlie won't mind”. They sit down (finally) on the sofa and David explains the scenario. David says he was kicking his ball around and it went over the fence and that's when he saw what happened with Charlie and Tracy. Gail says he will have to answer lots of questions and a judge is going to try and catch him out. She says she wishes he was lying.

Gail and David enter the police station. Gail asks David if he is ready to stand up to a judge and jury (okay, we get it) He says yes and that she said all this. Gail says she does not seem to be getting through to him. (No surprise) Gail gives him a look and goes up to the desk and gives her name.
The two detectives overlooking the case ask David about the information about Charlie. He says, “Yeah and that he saw the whole thing.” They say what, and David says he saw “Tracy kill Charlie”.


Log on to ebay.co.uk now.

Roy and Hayley have taken down some boxes from their flat for Becky to sell to raise money to rent a flat. Roy says he wants to keep the comics and ray gun, much to Hayley’s annoyance. Becky comes into the café, and thanks them for the items. She sees the comics, and goes through them very casually. Roy while having a heart attack, tells her they are very fragile. Hayley also has some items from Underworld for Becky to sell and she asks if she can keep a couple. Hayley asks Roy if he is still keeping the box he put aside. He says he is going to give them to someone who would have an interest in them as they valuable and says they will spend the money on something for them.

Gets some action.

Sean asks if there is any gossip going around at the factory and Kelly says Liam fancies her. Liam walks over and tells the group they have a new huge order. The girls (and Sean) don't think Liam likes her as Kelly says he won’t show it in front of all them. (Can we say delusional?) Kelly goes to see Liam and says thanks for last night at dinner, but says it was crowded with Joanne. Liam says she is “quiet and discreet” and that some people can’t take a hint. (ahem, meaning her). The phone rings and he says he was enjoying their conversation… When she comes out, Fizz says he has told her to get lost.

The rest of the crew have left the factory and Liam comes out of his office. He tells Joanne that he was just thinking about her, and there she is. He says he told Kelly she was quiet and discreet. She says she can be and he kisses her, softly. He asks if he is keeping her from her mates and she says no and kisses him, again. I am quite sure this is against all employer/employee relations, but I can’t help wish I was Joanne…


Pass the brown sauce.

Outside the flat, Fiz like the good surrogate mother she is - gets Chesney ready for school. Les asks him to come around to the house so they can “Sort things out.” Chesney says okay. At the Battersbys’, Les says to Cilla they have to tempt Chesney back and suggests they give him sausage and chips. (Sounds good to me) Cilla says, “He will be wanting that every day then”. Les says its just till they get him back. He says he will get the sausages and all he is asking is she speaks nice to him while he is eating them.


Cilla says she won't go begging. Les says just say sorry for saying she was dying. Chesney who has been listening to the entire conversation after opening the door, tells Fiz he does not want to go in. Fiz goes into the house and tells Les and Cilla, that they have messed it up again as Chesney has heard them argue.


Tracy hears she is free as a bird.

At the prison interview room, the lawyer tells Tracy she has got her bail on a couple of conditions. Tracy is elated at the news. The lawyer tells Tracy she had to convince the judge she won't run away or intimidate any witnesses. (LOL). The lawyer says they are all on her side and Tracy grins and says she will follow the judge’s conditions.

Back at the Barlow’s, Deirdre is on the phone and is ecstatic as she tells Ken, Tracy will be out in half an hour. There is a knock at the door and it is Gail. She says David is sticking with his story but she has mixed feelings. As this happens David watches like the psycho he is, from the window across the street.

Outside the Barlow house, Tracy pulls up in a taxi with her lawyer. She shows her the house, where it all happened. Tracy says she will obey the judge's orders and gets out of the taxi. Inside, Tracy says the prison was like a “madhouse”. She says she just wants to have a shower and get out of her clothes. Ken tells her he has something to tell her, but Tracy says she is going for a shower and when she comes back she wants to hear about Amy. Ken tells her there is a witness who saw everything that happened. Tracy looks stunned but tries to smile and asks “Who?” Ken says David…

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Obscure Football Reference of the Day

During last night's episode Less was trying to suck up to Chesney and get him to kick the football around with him and Kirkeh. When the lads agree Less gets excited and announces 'I'll be Zinedine Zidane!' In case anyone has been in a coma moon for the last decade and doesn't recognize the name, Zidane is a French footballer of some fame who retired after an infamous end to his career at the 2006 World Cup. In spite of that moment of madness in the Final against Italy, and the fact that he is a surrender prone Frenchie, (although of Algerian origins) the smurfman has to say that Zidane is one of the 5 best footballers of the modern era, in the same category as George Best, Franz Beckenbauer, Maradona, and Pele.

The only thing he and Less have in common is a short temper.

Michael in Manchester

Here is the picture of Michael (Kevin Webster) and I, taken last week in the city centre. Obviously, a Man U fan...

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Update- Wednesday, October 24, 2007- I Saw You!



Okay, so David lacks Jimmy Stewart's charm. And neither Maria nor Tracy are Grace Kelly, but still...


The scene opens with Gail once again banging on David's car window as David listens to music. She tells him that he is an hour late for work, and Audrey is about to fire him. So, he does go into work. Audrey lectures him, and Maria is cool to him. He asks Maria to speak with him. They go to the back room, where he apologizes for last night. Maria tells him that they should simply pretend nothing happened, which David takes offence to. He accuses her of leading him on. Maria takes offence to that, and tells him in no uncertain terms that what he tried to do the night before will never happen.

Later, Blanche comes in to get her hair cut, but doesn't want it cut by Maria. Maria fights back, and slams Tracy. David wades into the fray, and says that Charlie got was coming to him. He then adds that he hopes Charlie will rot in hell.

Audrey is unimpressed with David's outburst, and tells him in the backroom (where apparently all private conversations are held) that he should show a sense of decorum at the salon. It is at this point that David decides to reveal that Charlie tried to drown him. Audrey doesn't believe him at first, but David challenges her to ask Maria about it. Maria does not deny it, and looks upset and guilty. Blanche's eyes, at this point, are as big as her glasses, and for once in her life she is struck dumb. Audrey sends David home to tell Gail.

The next time we see David, he is at home, watching television, while Gail questions him about the drowning. Well, actually, she kind of shouts at him. Which I have always found works very well in getting someone who is recalcitrant to talk about a traumatic experience. Deirdre comes by in order to question David herself about it, and to get him to talk to the police. Gail is more concerned about what David has been through. Deirdre, showing compassion and care, doesn't care what he has been through, as she wants to help her daughter. Gail tells her quite clearly that what is important here is David, not Tracy.

Then, perhaps having realized that confession is good for the soul, David says that he "saw it". When pressed, he blurts out that he saw Tracy kill Charlie. He leaves. Deirdre at this point goes into higher gear, wanting police involvement, and the truth "slapped out of" David. Gail, acting as though she has some control over David, promises that she will find out what is going on, and take him to the police if necessary.

David has retreated to his car. Maria comes around and, implying that he might be lying, warns him not to do anything he will regret because of her. David tells her that the world does not revolve around her, and that now that Charlie is dead, there is no one to stop him. Maria is slightly confused, and asks, "Stop you from doing what?", to which David says, "stop me from doing anything I want". Because David has shown so much restraint in his actions lately.



Flirting and Fighting

Paul and Carla come to the Street, arguing about the night before. Carla is upset that Paul didn't take her out for their anniversary, and Paul justifies himself. Carla insists that Paul will be taking her out that night, and Paul tries to weasel out of it. Carla keeps insisting, and wins.

Later, we see that Kelly and Joanne are working on the week end for Carla. Kelly asks Joanne why she is thinking about ending the relationship with Adam, and Joanne says she is getting bored. Liam shows up, and struts around. Kelly flirts. Then Carla comes by and offers to take the girls out. Joanne tells her she is supposed to go out on a date with Adam, but Kelly is willing to go out. Liam is surprised, as he thought Paul was taking Carla out, but also reveals that he was supposed to have a beer with Paul. So Carla suggests that they all go out together. Joanne quickly decides that the date with Adam wasn't a sure thing anyway, and agrees to go.

The next scene opens with the four, and Paul, out for a drink. Liam is sticking his (clothed) arse out prominently for Kelly and Joanne to see. He is not simply posturing as a baboon would, however, but is telling a story about a girl who he was going out with that had "Liam" tattooed on her butt, for him, he says. Carla clarifies that, in fact, the girl had a thing for Liam Gallagher, and that was why she had that lovely tattoo.

Carla's plot is also revealed. The reason she asked the girls to go out is to give Paul a taste of his own medicine. Promise a night out, and then change things around completely. Paul is not amused.

The night does not go well, however, as Liam decides to cut out early. He offers Kelly and Joanne a ride back to the street, and they agree. Kelly thinks that this will be her chance to make the move on Liam, but Joanne points out that they will be dropping her off first. In fact, neither go very far. Both are dropped off at the Rover's. Kelly is in a huff. Joanne, who gets out after Kelly, asks Liam what he wants to do, and, charmingly, Liam says that he will go out with the lads to check out the "fillies". Joanne is disappointed.

Carla's plot is also foiled, as she does get a night out with Paul. And Paul tries to make things up by hiring the strolling violinists to serenade the table. As Carla points out, that is the height of cheesy.

Sadness on the Street

Sean comes back from Spain (hurrah!). Violet collapses in his arms, crying. She is not dealing with the ectopic pregnancy so well, it seems.

Meanwhile, Less tries to work his way back into Ches' life by trying to play "footie" with him. Ches goes out, but Less ends up playing with Kirk instead. Less then tries to talk Ches into coming back home, justifying his actions, justifying Cilla's actions, and claiming that Cilla has cried over Ches. Chesney's answer: "I am tired of being the adult".

And, Jason

Jason is a bit overwhelmed with the work he has, and is having trouble figuring out how he will pay for supplies. His problems seem to be answered, when a client Jason clearly does not know or remember, comes by, apologizes profusely for being so late with a payment, and hands him a wad of cash. Jason takes it, though even he seems to realize that there is a right course to take with this, and a wrong path.


Bye Bye Charlie Update

taft funeral

Well, That Answered That
Who would show up to Charlie’s funeral….Jason, Maria, David, Sarah a few drinking mates and oh yeah…his killer. I honestly thought there would be a few more people from the street as these events (i.e. Bridcilla and Less’s fake wedding) tend to bring folks out – if not for curiosity sake. I’m surprised that the Croppers weren’t there.

But let’s take it from the top.

We see Deidre in the Barlows back yard moaning and sobbing about how she won’t wear black that that monster’s funeral. (yeah, whatever, we get it…he’s a MONSTER.). Ken tells her that they will have to be calm and collected for Tracey’s sake.

Meanwhile over at Stornaway, I mean, Strangeways – one of the screws* checks in on Tracey to see if she needs some sedative before going to the funeral. Tracey does her doe-eyed look and says no that she’d rather have a clear head.

Andrea Palmer asks why she’s bothering to go to the bastard’s funeral and Tracey says, ‘My lawyer says it’s good if I show remorse.’. (Oh Tracey, Tracey, Tracey, Tracey….). Andrea, just keeps reeling her in by saying that the jury won’t fall for the unstable abused wife act and Tracey retorts, ‘They haven’t seen mine.’ (Okay, now you're just being foolish.).

Back on the street, Fiz asks Maria if she is sure that she wants to go the funeral and Maria says yes because she did love him once and that she needs this. This I think explains some of Maria’s behaviour – I think she’s really just looking for closure of some sort and that understandable. Later she looks wistfully at Charlie’s work yard as David comes up to give her 'support' and tells her that they are ready to go over to the funeral with Jason and Sarah.

At the funeral home, Jason notices how completely empty the room is save themselves and a gang of Charlie mates. Then the Barlows show up and a mumbling ensues about why they are there. Tracey makes her entrance and I think she breaks the sound barrier with the speed in which her face went from smiles to 'distressed widow' sad face.

Jason, worried that Charlie is going to go to his eternal resting place without any kind of eugoogly, stands up and says a few words about Charlie being a good mate, good for a few laughs (Sorry? What? When, WHEN the HELL was Charlie ever funny?), and he taught Jason a lot of things.

At this point Ken makes an aside, ‘I hope he didn’t teach him everthing he knows.’. Now, Glacia isn’t a hugely superstitious person, but really, heckling during a funeral is really asking for some bad ass karma as far as I’m concerned.

Then the big red drapes close and Glacia giggles when she thinks of the old Dave Allen skit where after the drapes close, the casket comes back out for a encore performance. I tried to find the skit on youtube, but will have to make do with this one.



Maria is overwhelmed by it all, breaks down in tears** and runs out of the funeral, but not before saying to Tracey, ‘I hope you’re happy now!’. Tracey screams back, ‘Happy? This is all your fault you evil little cow!’. David follows her outside to give her support, but can’t understand why she’s crying over Charlie.

Everyone else leaves the funeral and as Tracey is being hauled off in the prison van, one of Charlie’s friend calls her a ‘murdering bitch’. Oh SNAP!

Oh yeah, there’s more crap Deidre crying.

David continues to give Maria 'support' and they head over to the café. When Maria continues to be sad about Charlie, David says, ‘Oh god, you’re not still going on about THAT are you?’. David, David, David…when you offer 'support' to someone, that means you have to listen to them go on and on and on and on about their ‘issue’ until your eyes glaze over, and your neck hurts from nodding. This whining and complaining may go on well past 23 minutes after funeral.

Even later, on the Maxine Peacock death bench, Maria contemplates moving from Weatherfield. David wisely decides to seduce her into staying by going in for a kiss. Maria, creeped out this move, jumps up and calls him a kid, a freak, and tells him that this moment is NOT all about him and his agenda and that he needs to stay the hell away from her.

*I’ve been waiting soooooooo long to say ‘screw’ on Corrie Canuck
** Marie could give Deidre crying lessons. I just noticed that Maria cries differently from Deidre, she does it all, kind of, good.


Jamie Oliver Takes On Weatherfield
The Battersby’s discuss over the breakfast table about Chez’s flight to Fizz. Cilla is convinced that he will be back shortly once he realizes that Fizz can’t give him what he needs.

Less thinks that Chez is trying to teach them all a lesson. My god, Less, do you think there’s anything possibly wrong with the fact that you think a 12 year old needs to teach you a lesson?

Over at Fizz’s Swinging Peroxide Scented Pad, she is getting all Canadian Living by cooking a good healthy dinner as suggested by a pamphlet from Chez’s school. That blond celebrity chef has obviously been around.

I Treasure You People
Becky shows up late for work and Haley and Roy notice that she is not wearing a jacket. When they ask, she tells them that someone from the hostel stole her best (aka 'only') jacket. They wonder if it wouldn’t be better for her if she got a flat no that she’s earning some cash. The age old problem of getting first and last month’s rent seems to be her obstacle.

After some discussion, Haley and Roy tell Becky that they are going to clean out some items from their flat and have a carboot sale. All the money from that sale will go to Becky’s first/last month rent fund.

She is overwhelmed that they would do that for her and a Mary Tyler Moore type group hug ensues.

Screw It, I Think I Actually Dig Her
It’s Paul and Karla’s 8th anniversary and he has something special planned for the evening…that is until he finds out that Liam is going to business meeting that night. Paul is too worried that younger brother will be taken advantage of, so he throws off the anniversary date in order to accompany Liam to the meeting.

Karla, consoles herself with a drink at the Rovers, where Michelle comes in looking very, very glam for her date with Sonny*** that evening.

Karla asks Steve if he would consider buying a lonely married woman a drink and Steve replies, ‘No offense, but you terrify me.’ (Bling, bling, Karla’s got Glacia points.)

Later, when some one asks her what she’s doing at the bar, she replies, ‘Just living the dream’. (Bling, bling, bling - double Glacia points.)

Please note, the current on Glacia to Debbie points exchange rate is 1.43.

In Other News
Kelly likes Liam, Liam fancies Joanne

Steve won’t stop pursuing Michelle.

***Glacia wonders if Sonny’s downfall is that he never says more than one sentence at a time. Maybe he’s just got a dull as dishwater personality which he covers up with flashy cars and a fleet of polo ponies.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

The It’s Your Special Day Update: October 22nd 2007


The show opens with the Batterby-Browns the day after Chezney does a runner with his Great flaming Dane. Why he didn’t just ride the dog to Liverpool, I will never understand. Yes, Chezney is still living over the salon with Fizz and Maria.* things are getting a little tight over there. As Fizz makes her brother his butty for his dinner, Chezney walks into the bathroom and sees Maria in the shower. I guess the shock makes him stare. Maria is not amused.

Chezney gets a bit of a talking to and he says that he should not have stayed there. Fizz tells him that they love having him there. Maria agress … sort of.

Later Fizz sees Chezney making himself a peanut butter and jam sarni for his tea. Fizz tells him that he needs proper food and because there is nothing in, she will head to the grocery. Chezney is touched and honestly grateful that Fizz cares so much for him.

In the chippy, Cilla is talking to Kirk and running down Fizz. She tells him that Fizz wont be able to cope and that you have to be available for your kids 100% of the time. Funny. Then Yanna walks in. Cilla stops talking to Kirk and slaps Yanna across the face. Yanna says that she deserved that. I guess that is sorted. Later, they go to the pub.

*I have often wondered about that flat. Salons, while wonderful places, are often thick with fumes. Audrey’s salon must be pretty strong what with all the blue rinses, fake blonds and manicured nails walking around in Weatherfield. I wonder if Fizz and Maria get headaches.

In the kabin Norris and Rita are discussing what must be the UK’s version of Classmates.com. Norris is so keen it is hilarious. Rita and I share the same attitude about that. If we didn’t keep in touch, it is probably because we never liked you to begin with, so we wouldn’t want a life update. Norris however, talks Rita around and she gives him permission to find her friends from her former club days, Charlie Rosco’s Exotic Dancers. I love Rita’s showgirl past.

While they are talking Maria walks into the cabin. Norris can’t help himself and makes a crack about Charlie. Maria – clearly suffering for some sort of amnesia where you forget that your ex-bf was actually two timing his missus, lying to you, had a filthy temper and tried to drown your friend – tells Norris that most people didn’t know Charlie like she did. Norris pointed out that in actual fact, many women did. With that comment, Norris got 10 Debbie points.

As they have this tête-à-tête David (the victim of the aforementioned attempted drowning) walks into the cabin and then walks out again rightfully annoyed.* Maria catches up with him in the street and they talk it over. David really should have stuck to his guns here. I think it would have been a great time for someone to pull out the laundry list of what Charlie was like and what she was on the receiving end of. Instead they make up and agree to go to the funeral together. Silly.

Later in the pub Norris comes running in with the information he found about Rita’s lap dancing group. One name sticks out Doreen Fennick. Rita decides to get in touch.

*I know what you are thinking, how could I be on David’s side here? But, I am. David is right. As hot as he was, Charlie was a nasty piece of work and I find it shocking that Maria has totally forgotten about what he was like. It is also sloppy writing, I think. Maria should be much more conflicted than she is. Also, she should be more inclined to at least consider Tracy’s story. He never hit Maria, but there were times when he was menacing toward her and he was very violent with David. He was obviously a bully and Maria knew that. If only she knew that he was watching her with the help of closed circuit TV.


Claire Peacock remains delusion but you have to admire her pluck. She is circulating a birthday card as well as a petition. Sarah makes a point of not signing the card or petition and tells Claire as much. Norris tells her that he doesn’t want to be involved giving some stupid excuse about being an impartial newsagent. Oh Norris.

Over at Number
1, Ken is wondering aloud if he and Deirdre should tell Tracy about Charlie’s funeral. Deirdre is sitting at the table wallowing and making me want to kill her. I should be more understanding, as it is Tracy’s 30th birthday. I guess Deirdre is allowed to be extra special sad today. The bright ray of sunshine, Claire pops in with Tracy’s card and petition. Ken says that Tracy will be pleased. Ken has obviously never met Tracy.

Over at Strangeways, Tracy gets a new cellmate, Andrea Palmer, for her birthday. Andrea is obviously a lovely woman and when she is rude to the guard Tracy seems to take an immediate liking to her. Later, Ken and Deirdre show up with card and petition in tow. Tracey notes that not may people signed either. Mainly because she spent so much of her life being a nasty biatch. They tell her that Jason is arranging the funeral. Tracy thinks that Jason is too dumb to arrange lunch. Then, I guess she catches herself and pretends to cry over the impending funeral.

Jane Simon and Tracy meet for the first time. Jane tells Tracy two things that make her happy. First, Jane can get Tracy out for the funeral. Second, Jane feels that she can get Tracy bail now since the police have already done their interviews. She also warns Tracy that she could be convicted and that would mean a very long prison sentence.

I guess Manchester’s answer to Cynthia Dale is worth her pretty penny. Ken and Deirdre get a call from her telling them that Tracy will be able to attend Charlie’s funeral. Ken says that they will have to as well to support Tracy.

Back in the 11 x 4, this Andrea Palmer may be the only woman nastier than Tracy. She is obviously smarter than most people on the street. Andrea sees right through Tracy and tells her that it isn’t so easy to claim self-defense as an abused woman. She gives Tracy the only real challenge to her abuse claim and Tracy looks scared.

Monday, October 22, 2007

What Glacia Wants

My nomination for who should play Charlie's long lost brother.

Smile_new

Definate family resemblence.

bw

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Forty Years of Corrie



I don't think this has been posted before but this is the introduction to a special episode celebrating Coronation Street's 40th anniversary in 2000. A lot of the characters shown, like Vikram or Toyah have either moved on or, like Mike Baldwin, passed away. But I love the tableaux of all the characters and damn, don't Sally Webster look good there. The narrator is Susie Blake, our Bev Unwin.

The actual episode was performed and broadcast live to air. I wonder what they'll do for Corrie's 50th in 2010.
Update- Thursday, October 18, 2007 and Friday, October 19, 2007

Brought to you from the Corrie Net update, so there may be some errors as I reinterpret their information

Happy Birthday to You!




The scene opens with the Barlows (except poor Tracy and Amy) singing happy birthday to Blanche. She doesn't want to celebrate, as, sigh, there is nothing to celebrate today.

Later, Ken and Deirdre go to the solicitor's office (who is actually a barrister, but who am I to quibble?). She confirms that she can't take the case on through legal aid until the hearing comes up and the judge makes her decision. She tells them that she would be able to get Tracy out in a few days. This makes Deirdre happy, but Ken is still worried. The lawyer tells them that the trial would run about 100, 000 pounds.

On the drive home, Deirdre mentions that Ken is being quiet. Ken says that he won't be pushed into risking every penny. He also says he wants what's best for Tracy and to have her home. When Deirdre pushes, he finishes off by saying that he hopes no one else in the family is going to need a top solicitor.

Back at home, Deirdre raves about the new lawyer, and talks about the press cuttings on the wall of the cases she has won (oh how tacky). Deirdre seems to be a bit delusional, because she seems convinced that the judge will grant legal aid.

Ken, in the mean time, has been to the loan company. Okay, granted, I haven't even seen the show, but here I will go and complain. Why is it that Ken is doing the running around and sorting the finances if it is Deirdre that is flapping her gums about getting Tracy the best lawyer possible? Anyway, he says that they are sending the forms, but that their nest egg will be blown in one fell swoop. They argue, Ken still worried about the judge not granting legal aid, and Deirdre insisting that if that is to happen, then they should accept Adam and Blanche's money (so they can all be destitute, apparently). Deirdre then says that Ken thinks it is Tracy's fault (hmm.. perhaps for once Deirdre speaks the truth).


Not Wanted Dead or Alive

At the Grimshaws' Jason clues in that it might not be legal for him to keep taking work when the owner of the business is dead. He decides to find out.

Although he is ready to find out about the business, he seems to not be prepared to find adequate child care for Holly, as he first attempts to take her to work, and then attempts to unload her on Tyrone.

When Sarah comes by, he does unload Holly onto her. He then tells her that the police will release Charlie's body to the person who claims it. No one has wanted to, including Charlie's brother, who simply can't be found. When Sarah asks what will happen if no one claims it, Jason tells her he will be buried by the local authority on the cheap. Sarah suggests that Tracy is likely the next of kin, so Jason, showing more bravery than wisdom, says he will go over to the Barlows' to discuss it. He wonders how he got stuck with a baby and a funeral.

When Jason and Sarah go to Eileen's, he tells her that he is taking care of the funeral. She objects. Sarah reminds her that Charlie was Jason's friend. Eileen tells them she will babysit so that they can go to the Rover's.

At the Rover's, Sarah overhears when Claire tells Gail that Tracy is getting a new solicitor. Sarah, seeming to think that a conversation she is not part of is her business, tells Claire that at least Tracy is alive. When Gail reminds Sarah that Claire is Tracy's friend, Sarah feels it prudent to then say that Jason is sorting out the funeral arrangements.

Jason then actually does begin to sort out the funeral arrangements. Luckily, Charlie's estate will pay for the funeral. Then he goes to ask the Barlows about claiming the body. He rings the doorbell as Ken and Deirdre argue. Adam answers the door, Jason explains his errand, and, is anyone surprised? the Barlows decide they will not claim Charlie's body.

"We are young, heartache to heartache we stand... No promises, no demands"




At Fiz' apartment, Fiz tells Maria that Cilla is expected back that day. While Chesney is listens from the other room, she also tells Maria that she is not Ches' mother, and he cannot continue to stay there.

Meanwhile, at the Battersby-Browns', Less and Kirk are cleaning up. Less reasons that although he slept with his partner's best friend, she has frollicked in Florida while he has suffered. Things are even, then, between them.

Cilla arrives, and Fizz sees her get out of the cab. The holiday has not softened Cilla into a human being. When Fizz tells her that Less is falling apart, Cilla thinks this is excellent, and he deserves the pain. Cilla goes into the house, and takes money from the money tin.

She then goes to the Kabin, looking for a present for Chesney. She does not receive a warm welcome. She apologizes for lying, but justifies it. Norris insists on getting his money back, but in doing so, must reveal that he only contributed a pound to her fund. She pays both Rita and Norris back.

Later, at the corner shop, she confronts Eileen, Dev and Tyrone about the fact that they are not being very welcoming. They point out that she conned them. She does not endear herself to them when she blames it on Less and tells them she has scars.

After she has returned home, Less arrives. He whines about working off her debt and that he was "gutted" when he thought she was sick. Cilla, in turn, is happy that Less is miserable, and says they will continue together, miserably ever after.

They go to the Rover's where they meet Fizz and tell her they are back together. Kirk then arrives and tells them that Schmeichel is gone. They go to find the dog.

They return to the Battersby-Browns', dogless. It is there that Cilla learns that Ches has been staying with Fizz. She berates Less for not being up to the task.

Fizz decides to go to her apartment to see if the dog is there. Instead, she finds something else, which turns out to be a note from Ches saying he has run away. Meanwhile, Less finds out that Ches has not been to school. Fizz goes to the Battersby-Browns', and explains the situation .

Cilla phones the police, and waits at home, in case Ches returns, and the rest go to look for him. Ches and Schmeichel, meanwhile, walk alone in the rain. Then, when he tries to get on the bus to Liverpool, he finds out that, though England is a dog-loving country, Great Danes aren't allowed on intercity buses.

The police visit Cilla, and reassure that they should be able to find a small boy with a Great Dane with some ease.

Next, we see Fiz on her motor scooter. Less phones her and tells her that another cabbie saw Ches, so she heads to where he has been spotted. She finds them, and calls out to Chesney. He keeps walking, more quickly. She revs her bike to chase after him, but falls. Ches returns to ensure she is ok. They talk, and Ches admits that it is not easy to run away. He tells her he left because he overheard Fiz and Maria talking about his leaving. Fiz tells him that there simply isn't enough room for him to live there permanently. Less arrives and Ches ignoring him, just gets into the car.

They return to the Battersby-Browns where Cilla handles the situation with her usual finesse. She tells Ches that he was selfish, and Fizz tells her she is in no position to criticize. Ches tells her flatly that he is not staying, he just came because he was hungry. Cilla tries to give him the gift from the Kabin, saying that she brought it back from Florida. Chesney informs her he knows it is not from Florida. Fiz decides to take Ches home. Less pleads with Ches. Ches tells him he is not his dad. Then he tells Cilla that he doesn't consider her to be his mum anymore, either, and leaves with Fizz.

In Other, Mostly Unrelated News

Blanche gets a couple of birthday cards.

David is upset that Maria is sad about Charlie.

Norris is looking up old classmates on-line (the question is, does anyone want to be looked up by Norris)?

Liam is mad that Fizz didn't show up for her shift. Kelly and Joanne do extra work for Carla.

Steve impresses Michelle with his ability to impersonate a good father.

We are Currently Experiencing Technical Difficulties...


Unfortunately, I had some VCR issues last night (yes, I still use a VCR to tape off of TV), so will only be posting sometime tomorrow.

Friday, October 19, 2007

MOUSTACHE!

From Pauline's brush with Corrie Celebrity.

KevinCorrie

This is the autographed pic she got from Michael Le Vell when he was the special guest at the British Isle Show in Toronto 20 years ago.

i love it.

The 'Oh Good Hysteric Bitchy Deidre and Judgemental Gail All In One Wonderful Episode' Update

fiz patch

Before I start the update two things.

Best Line of the Episode
Liam asks Paul about Fiz and when Paul can't remember who she is, Liam says, 'You know Cabbage Patch Kid, red hair.'

Solid Gold!

I Call Bullshit
Peter sees Maria in the Rovers and says, 'Excuse me have we met before?'

What??!!!

Maria's been on the street since 2000 and the last time Peter was on the show was around 2003. Granted they wouldn't be in the same social circles but seeing how everyone knows everyone else' business I truly cannot believe that he's never seen her before.

She would have been legal drinking age before he left, so you're telling me they've never seen each other in the pub during that time? It's the kind of thing that makes me want to watch every single episode from 2000 on and find that moment when they talk, take that clip and send it to the writers accompanied by this recent interaction and a letter that merely says, 'bullshit.'.

In Which Glacia Pities Ken
So Tracey is in that special place right now that makes me despise her. It's that special place she goes to every so often that makes me despise her, but makes me despise Deidre much, much more. I spent most of the episode screaming at the telly and the walking glasses that accompanies Deidre and her weather beaten chest with its Pringle chips texture.

Ken and D go to visit Tracey in the slammer, happy that Tracey is on a up note despite her situation. This quickly falls away when a sullen face Tracey comes into the room.

Turns out that because her council is legal aid, she cannot just dump 'Rumpled of the Bailey' (love that line) without approval from the judge. Ken thinks this is for the best as he believes in the lawyer's ability to give Tracey the best defense possible.

Tracey says that is nonsense and basically demands that they spend the 'measly' few quid it would take to pay for a lawyer until the judge can approve her choice of a legal aid attorney.

When Ken says that he won't pay for a lawyer, Tracey suggests that he and Deidre use that money to take a nice vacation together. Ken looks at her and says, 'You really can't help it, can you?' (Second best line of the episode.).

Deidre of course, readily agrees with Tracey and back at home the family has a big argument about which course of action to take. On one side, Deidre, Blanche and Adam (who is unwilling to use his own money, btw) who think they should pay for an attorney and on the other Ken and Peter who are using such daft resources such as logic to conclude that it's better to wait it out for the judge's decision.

As Ken so rightfully points out, they'll waste their financial resources on a lawyer and will mostly likely lose access to legal aid altogether if they start paying for a lawyer. By the time the judge makes a decision, their financial resources will be drained and then Tracey will be stuck without any counsel.

Deidre and Blanche think he's being completely heartless for not spending money on Tracey's defense and Blanche accuses Ken of being a wet liberal who's gone conservative. She offers her own money for Tracey's defense and with that she, Deidre and Adam storm off the Rovers.

Peter goes over a bit later to talk to them, but they are determined to do what they think is right. Finally Ken comes over and says that if they are so set on this course of action, he will find the money help Tracey. He then makes it clear to Blanche that it is a moral issue for him that he pays for it, 'My daughter, my money.'.

Sometimes I really feel bad for Ken...how in the hell did he get stuck with these people?

Meanwhile...Clurr
While Ken is alone in the house, Claire comes by with some petition news. Ken listens to her, but then tells her that they are having some additional issues right now and that he'll have to deal with the petition later. Claire gets offended by this saying that this the thanks she gets for trying to help.

Oh, Claire, if you only knew how much Tracey appreciates your friendship. Back in the big house, when Ken tells Tracey that Claire wants to visit, she tells him that she can't be bothered with her. Ken reminds her not to abuse those people who are on her side. She couldn't give a rat's ass.

There's more grief in store for Claire when she approaches Maria to sign the petition for Tracey's defense. Maria tells her in no uncertain terms that she thinks Tracey is a bigger monster than Charlie ever was and that she stuff her petition.

235 Enemies and Counting
News is out that Bill is moving in with Audrey and while the Websters seem nonplus about the whole thing, Gayle has decided to get on her moral high horse about it. She thinks that it's a disgrace that Audrey is letting him shack up with her.

She doesn't, however, think it's a disgrace to publicly deride her mother on the street when she sees Bill loading his luggage into the boot of Audrey's car. Bill goes over and has a chat with Gayle, which seems to calm her down.

Later when Audrey enters the pub, Blanche takes that opportunity to call her a hussy. Peter wonders if the Barlows don't have enough enemies already. Gayle, in a surprising mood, sticks up for Audrey and puts Blanche in her place.

Night Moves
Paul and Liam decide that Karla has to stop using the factory to manufacture her line of overalls and sit her down in the Rovers to break the news. Karla listens and then tells them what's really going to happen.

She tells them that the factory should be open in the evenings for a graveyard shift that can manufacture her line of clothes. That way she's not infringing on knicker producing resources during the day. I didn't catch if she was suggesting hiring more staff, but I think that's a given.

I'm not hating Karla as much as I did initially, and I especially like her dog collar necklace.

Less Becomes Creepier and Creepier
Less is out in the back of the house putting up laundry when Kirk comes to speak to him. He does a rant about how he's already lost his wife and he's not about to lose 'the lad' too. He asks Kirk, 'Is this the look of a bad father'?

Oh jesus, well, let's see, you're filthy and that ginger haired facial growth is probably littered with bits of scrambled eggs and toast and your breath probably smells like Milwaukee....but yeah, Robert Young, you look like a perfectly fit father.

Later, Less approaches Chesney on the street and asks him to come over to the house to re-wallpaper the walls for when Cilla comes back. (Glacia cheers at the prospect of that water damaged crap that is currently on the wall being removed from her view forever.). Chesney makes a comment about needing food and time for homework, but Less tries to tempt him with a dvd and having some laughs like they used to. Besides, Less asks, when did Chesney ever care about homework. Ches tells Less that he's trying to improve himself and makes note of the 6 pack of beer in Less's hands.

Me thinks that Chesney is outgrowing Les.

Later, Fizz goes over to give Less a lecture and tells him that she thinks he's a rubbish dad and that she's willing to tell him that even if Chesney won't.

ouch.

In Other News
Peter Hits On Maria
I'm kind of getting sick of these May/December romances, that's all I got to say about it.

Cone of Silence
David sulks in his car with the music and annoys the neighbours.

Bethany Watch
Wrapped up tightly in snow hoodie and scarf with only two eyes peering out, Glacia wonders if Bethany has converted to orthodox Islam.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

From Our Roving Reporter

kw

I just got news from Corrie Canuck Updater Karen H., who's currently in Manchester.

Brace yourselves....

I was sitting in the Triangle in Manchester city centre and saw a camera crew go by. It was Michael Le Vell, aka Kevin Webster - doing some tv special and I caught him and got a picture with him. He asked me where I was from and I told him about the blog! Will send the picture when I get back.

So, it being our foundest wish that a Corrie star see our blog...I'm giving a shout out to Michael if he's reading this....and an invite to Toronto if he ever wants to be a guest of honour at a Corrie Canuck Pub Night.

All pints will be on us, AND I will rig the Corrie Trivia game to be all Kevin Wester related so that he can easily win the commemerative 'Rovers Return' keychain.

Kate Ford's Dress


There ya go...

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Update - October 17, 2007 - Olivia Novak? I have a Tracy Barlow on the line.



Did you have to go to jail / Put your house up on for sale, did you get a good lawyer?

At the Barlow's, Deirdre has taken to smoking inside and she and Ken have taken to quietly sniping at each other over their respective failure to save Tracy before things went too far.

Claire comes round to give Ken and Deirdre a friendship bracelet to give to Tracy. She's also starting a petition to have everyone sign, affirming that Tracy was in an abusive relationship and that she acted in self-defence. Deirdre and Blanche don't seem optimistic but Ken says that you can't discount "people power." Deirdre tells Claire that she's been a good friend to Tracy.

"Not really," says Claire. "I stood by and did nothing." Nothing except keep a meticulously detailed notebook entitled "The Crimes Against Tracy Barlow As Perpetrated by the Coward Charlie Stubbs. November, 2006 through January, 2007."

"Join the club," says Deirdre.

Later, Ken and Deirdre arrive at [Edward G. Robinson]the Big House, the Slammer, the Joint, the Can. I'm talking about prison, see? Prison for dames![/Edward G. Robinson]

They tell Tracy that Amy is being well looked after. They also give her Claire's friendship bracelet and she fakes joy at receiving the thoughtful gift. It's hard to describe here but her expression cracked me up. Kate Ford is really funny when Tracy's required to feign enthusiasm. I wish they could have done more with that aspect of her.

She tells them about her "thick-as-pudding" cell-mate, Donna, who got done in for credit card fraud. Tracy proudly tells her parents that Donna became terrified of her when she told her what she'd been arrested for. Ken is slightly aghast but Tracy says it's all about survival. She also sticks to her story that it was all self-defence and neither of her parents are to blame.

Then she tells them that she's chucked her lawyer, Rumpled of the Bailey and has taken on Jane Simon, a hotshot lawyer who specialises in domestic abuse cases. All on legal aid, of course. Ken and Deirdre admit that it's important that she have confidence in her legal team.

When it's time to depart, Tracy makes of show of missing her parents then, when they've gone, asks Donna if she wants to swap some gum for a "manky friendship bracelet." Donna does not so Claire's gift goes in the bin.

Later in the pub, Claire overhears Kelly, Joanne, and Hayley talking about Tracy the Murderer. Claire insists to them that it was self-defence. Kelly counters that Tracy had legs and could have walked out at any time. Claire says obviously Kelly's never been in an abusive relationship (assume much?) and "God help us if you're ever on jury duty."

At the Barlow's, Blanche is worried that Tracy is not keeping warm what with her underwear at half-mast, her shirt crawling up to her neck, and that one kidney Samir Rachid gave her when he died and she overdosed on Ecstasy and was played by Dawn Acton.

The Barlows seem to think that things are going to turn out all right and, as Deirdre puts it, "She'll be back in no time. Treating us all like dirt. Using this place like a hotel. I can't wait."

So Tracy wants a young, sophisticated, hot shot female lawyer? I think I know just the person:
Cynthia Dale, to the rescue!


Flatmates and Bedsits

Fizz has convinced Maria to let Chesney comes stay with them a while. Unfortunately, Chesney wants to bring Schmeichel along. He tells Schmeichel that someday they'll have a big house with a garden but for now, they're going to live in the flat above the salon. He leaves a bucket for an unconscious Les and says goodbye to Château Battersby-Brown.

Fizz isn't so sure this is a good idea as the flat is "titchy" (small) and Audrey probably wouldn't allow it, which is confirmed when they ask. In any case, later on at the flat, Fizz and Chesney hatch a plan to show Maria how clean and unobtrusive he can be . Chesney suggests telling Maria that she has a nice bum. Fizz says not to be cheeky but I dunno, it couldn't hurt.

Suddenly Les appears and asks Chesney to come home, promising an evening of last night's Chinese Take-Away and the Matrix on DVD.

Fizz steps in and tells Less if he wants Chesney back, he's going to have to earn it.

Speaking of flatmates, Bill is looking for a new place and tells Audrey the local bedsits are depressing. Audrey agrees to let him stay with her.

Later, she gets an earful from Gail about being second best. Gail asks about her self-respect. Audrey says you can't cuddle up to Self Respect at night.

"This has got disaster written all over it," Gail says, in a startling departure from "It'll all end in tears."

In Other News

Jason is sticking Sarah with baby Holly while he goes off to work all those jobs she got for him, in his words, basically.

Carla is still poaching stitchers on company time for her dungaree business.

Hayley does the "Time's up" music sting from Countdown when her break is over.

Is This the Face of a Hardened Criminal?



Recently I have been thinking about Amy. That little mite has had some hard knocks in her short life. Her mother tried to sell her to the neighbours, and her father isn’t very thoughtful. Her mom’s last boyfriend didn’t want anything to do with her. She is forced to live in the dishwasher and she has a unibrow. It is hard to be her.

This kid is destined to spend a large part of her life visiting prison. I also think there is a huge chance that she will end up in one. Why, you ask. Well because it runs in the family. There is a good change that Tracy will end up in the slammer. We all know that Deirdre served a hard few weeks for a crime she did not commit. But, how many of us realize that bother her father and her grandfather are familiar with the inside of a cell.

On the cobbles
a brush with the law is almost expected in the development of some characters, even the ones who end up being one of Weatherfield’s successful entrepreneurs. I am not sure of Steve McDonald is part of the Square Dealers (now that both Alf Roberts and Fred Elliot are dead, I don’t know who is) but you have to wonder if they would let Steve in. Yes, Steve was once sent to jail for perversion. Not the fun kind, but the perversion of justice kind.

The story is a little involved but here goes. Steve always wanted to be a businessman, but didn’t really have the sense for it. He did like to be flashy and one year bought all of his clients and contacts whisky … of the stolen variety. Now, Steve was no stranger to fenced merchandise. In late 1991 he tried to sell Alf Robert’s stolen car radio. He was charged but after he refused to say who else was involved. His brother talked and was beaten up as a result. Liz went into premature labour due to all the stress. The baby died after a couple days and, wracked with guilt, Steve started to talk. Thanks to the information, he got off lightly with a 100 pound fine.

The stolen whisky business lead to a trial in early 1996. Steve was found innocent because the guy he bought it from (the fence) gave testimony that Steve didn’t know the whiskey was stolen. However, Steve had his then wife, Vicky, bribe the fence to lie in court. But, as things unravel in the street some domestic troubles caused the fence’s wife to testify that he had been bribed. Steve went to trial for perversion of justice and on May 24th he was sent down for two years.

Trips to the slammer run in the McDonald family. We all know about Jim and his Toronto Blue Jays sweatshirt. Jim had a nasty temper and always let it get the better of him. One night after Liz “confessed” to having an affair while Jim was away with the army he went crazy, beat her up and abandoned her at a service station. The dude is a nut-bar. Liz didn’t want him anywhere near her. Angry that Liz wouldn’t see him after the beating, he decided that the best way back into her heart was to break in through the back window. Curley Watts and Kevin Webster stopped him and handed him over to the police. This led Liz to taking out a restraining order against him, which he broke when he followed her into the Rovers wanting to have a civil conversation. Liz called the bill and Jim was sentenced to a few weeks in prison for breaking the restraining order.

I have seen a number of episodes from this time. Jim was a class 1 crazy. His jealousy was intense and there were a number of scenes where he leaves work and follows Liz around convinced that she was being unfaithful. It was actually pretty scary and I think the man needed to be institutionalized.

In 2000 Jim would let his temper flare out of control again, this time, in defense of his son Steve. Jez Quigley was drug-dealing scum in Coronation Street and he beat up Steve McDonald badly over unpaid debts. Steve was hospitalized and Jim was incensed. Jim gave Jez the beating of is life. He didn’t actually kill him in the beating, but while in the hospital Jez went to try and kill Steve (The Weatherfield General Hospital probably put them in the same room). As Jez tried to kill Steve, his Jim administered cracked rib punctured his spleen and lung. That was the end of Jez.

Jim confessed and was sentenced to 8 years in prison. Jim really is a dangerous character. According to Corrie.net he actually escaped prison in 2003 and tried to go to Ireland (weird). He escaped because he thought Liz was having an affair (weird). But was caught because he ended up saving Claire and Ashley who were adrift in a boat (weird). I don’t know if this added time to his sentence, but I do know that he later lost it over a tube of toothpaste and beat up his cellmate (psycho?). No parole for Jim.

I know a lot of Corrie Canuksters are big on Jim. But I have to say that he is a dangerous guy. I don’t know if the army made him crazy or what. I just hope that should they bring him back, his rage issues are addressed.



Poor little Amy. With both parents and two of four grandparents having experienced prison must she face the same fate? How long do the Canuksters think it will take before she gets sent down? And, what do you think the crime would be?

Monday, October 15, 2007

Update for Epiosde 6472 October 15, 2007

Chesney

Kirk comes home to find young Chesney giving the place a good cleaning while Less reposes on the sofa after a hard night of graft. Ches invites Kirkeh to come round later for some proper food. When Fiz hears about this state of affairs she decides that she should take Chesney under her care, at least until their useless excuse of a mother returns from swimming with the dolphins.

Later in the pub Fiz asks Maria if they can take in a lodger. 'Tall, dark, and handsome?' Maria asks, wistfully thinking of recently departed Charlie. 'Short, pale, and handsome' replies Fiz.

Bill

Bill makes a less then triumphant return to the cobbles. Kev and the girls seem glad to see him but Sal is less than overjoyed. Doing her best impersonation of a Gestapo officer at Prinz-Albrecht Strasse she grills Bill about the state of his marriage and if they can expect Maureen to be ringing every night or making any more surprise visits. Kev eventually realizes he has a set of testicles and tells Sal enough is enough, and takes Bill out to the pub for a drink.

Sal chats with David about his babe magnet of a car. He seems less than amused by the conversation.

Bill and Audrey have a bit of an awkward meeting outside the salon. Some small talk is made. Later in the pub the two old lovebirds run into each other and share a drink.

Jason

Jason is worried that the truth about Charlie and Tracey is not going to be told. Eileen tells him not to get involved, but he ignores her advice and tells the copper outside he wants to talk to someone about the real history of the relationship.

Young Grimshaw stops in at the builder's yard to sort a few things. Sarah comes by to see how he is doing. (looking quite smashing in that beret I might add) The phone rings and Jason tells one their clients that Charlie has died and that they might want to find someone else to do the work for them. After he hangs up Sarah tells him that he needs to step up and not turn away any jobs, he is a parent now and has to be responsible. The two of them proceed to go through all the jobs that Charlie had on the go and decide what he can do and what is beyond his present ability. Sarah, showing remarkable maturity, gets everything sorted in the office, and even books herself in for Friday night.

The two detectives eventually make an appearance to hear what Jason has to say about what happened between Charlie and Tracey. Jason is adamant that Charlie never raised a hand against Tracey, although he has no proof of that. However Jason does raise the point that there is no evidence that Charlie ever did any of the things that he is being accused of by the neighbours. The detectives want to hear more.

Maria

Maria leaves some flowers for Charlie outside his house.

Steve

Steve stops round to see if Eileen is planning on coming to work like she is supposed to. Eileen is looking after Holly so she works out a deal with Steve for that day and promises to get things sorted for child care soon.

Tracey

The Barlow clan is in the dining room after a sleepless night. They will find out that morning in court if Tracey is to get out on bail or not. Even Blanche sheds a tear. Peter tries to cheer the family up by telling them that Tracey is a 'tough old boot' and can take care of herself. Blanche thinks that prayer might be the appropriate course of action in the circumstances, but she gets a less than enthusiastic response from the congregation. In spite of their disbelief Blanche decides to get a steak from Elliott's for Tracey when she gets out on bail.

The family shows up at court where Blanche is on a first name basis with the court officials. 'Neil' tells her that everything should be on time that morning. When asked how she knows everyone at the courthouse Blanche explains that she attends regularily to insure that justice system is working properly - and it's cheaper than the pictures.

Tracey is brought for the reading of the charges. Her idiot lawyer finally speaks on her behalf, requestng that she be released on bail. Blanche calls him 'Dopey Drawers' and thinks they should have got Harper Sterling for a lawyer instead. Not only does he have an enviable record with his clients, he looks like a young Tony Curtis. However when the Crown attorney presents his case and asks that no bail be granted, the judge agrees and Tracey is remanded into custody, in spite of her vehement protestations.

Back at Number 1 Deirdre is in a right state. She just wants Ken to get mad for one instead of always being the voice of reason. Peter tells her that she should be nice to Ken, he is doing the best he can under the circumstances.

Tracey calls from prison tells her mother that all she really needs is for her family to be strong for her. While she is on the phone she is pestered by the other inmates to get off the phone and Tracey keeps telling them to get lost.

It seems that there lax standards for what prisoners wear in Her Majesty's prisons for women these days.

Schedule Changes and a Weddings

Schedule ChangesFirst, from CBC there is no corrie on Tuesday, but double episodes on Friday.

The THRONE SPEECH will be airing Tuesday, October 16 , 2007 from 6:30 pm
ET - 8:00 pm ET

Corrie is pre-empted on Tuesday. There will be double episodes airing
on Friday October 19 2007 (7:00 and 7:30 pm / 7:30 and 8:00 pm in
Newfoundland).

An Audience With Coronation Street will air Manitoba/West *only* at 7:00
pm local time (20:00 - 21:00 ET Manitoba, 21:00 - 22:00 ET in
Sask/Alta/MTN and 22:00 - 23:00 ET in BC/PTN).


Kate Ford Weds!

Kate Ford (Tracey Barlow) married her film director Jon Connerty (29) on Saturday

Corrie stars Samia Smith (Maria), Julia Haworth (Haley) and Shbna Gulati (Sunita) were in attendance.

Thanks to Corrie Canuck Pauline for that heads up.