Friday, August 31, 2007
Three cheers to Mayfairgirl for the link to the Schmeichel, the name Chesney gave to his Great Dane. However, for the sake of historical accuracy and football trivia, the Great Dane on the show is named after another great Dane - Peter Schmeichel - who is actually the father of Kasper Schmeichel, who is seen in the link. The father Peter played for Manchester United from 1991 to 1999, was voted the best goalkeeper in the world in 1992 amd 1993, and is the most capped player in the history of the Danish National football team. The son Kasper is in his first season in the top flight of English football, and has had a great start to his his career playing for Manchester City, the other big club in Manchester.
Tracy has come downstairs from getting changed after dinner. She tells Charlie she's ready to start their row, but Charlie tells her he's not interested in playing. Charlie suggests a movie – but Tracy says she wants to have a row, “whether you like it or not”. She goes to one of the windows at the front of the house and opens it. Tracy then proceeds to open the living room windows. She starts yelling but Charlie won't bite and he just ignores her.
She goes to take a sip of wine and starts yelling about Shelley, thinking she's got a very good topic there. 'Keep your voice down, the whole street is going to hear you,' Charlie says. Tracy grabs the paper from Charlie and throws it on the floor, screaming about how Charlie tried to control Shelley and he's trying to do the same to her. Charlie gets up and tells Tracy that she'd better stop now or he'll give her something to scream about. Tracy goes into the kitchen and picks up a plate and screaming, 'No Charlie, no, please put that down!' She then throws it against the wall. 'I'm going to do another one of them,' Tracy laughs. 'You are out of your mind, you're mental ,' Charlie says with a grin. Tracy picks up another plate and, yelling about Charlie being a bully, again throws the plate against the wall.
Claire is falling for the performance and tells Ashley they need to do something. Bev suggests to call the police but Claire says ‘No’ and that she is going to get Ken and Deidre. She rushes out of the house with Ashley in hot pursuit. Alone in the house, Bev can hear very clearly the fake yelling coming from next door. She gets onto the phone and dials the police. Across the street, Ken and Deirdre are horrified to hear their daughter screaming.
Charlie starts to really get into Tracy's fight and he tells her to get out. 'No what I want Charlie is to go somewhere where me and my child are safe,' Tracy screams. 'You mean you're not safe here?' Charlie yells. 'Well no, look at you, you've gone crazy!' Tracy yells. 'Well if I am, then who's made me like this?' Charlie says. They bicker back and forth about who made Charlie crazy when Ken and Deirdre run in, followed by Claire.
'Just what's going on?' Ken yells. 'Row over,' Tracy whispers to Charlie, who quickly realizes that he has been taken in. 'Hello?' Tracy says to her parents like nothing's happened. They ask what all the shouting was about and Tracy tells them they were playing a game. 'There were plates being thrown,' Claire says. 'Yeah, it's part of the game. Remind me to tell you about it Claire and you and Ashley can play it too,' Tracy says.
'Do you want to come home with us?' Deirdre begs 'No, I'm fine!' Tracy insists. 'So what was all the shouting about?' Ken yells. 'We were playing a game!' Tracy yells back. 'We, darling, weren't doing anything. You were trying to prove a point,' Charlie says. 'Which was what exactly?' Ken asks. 'That she's crazier than I thought she was,' Charlie says. Tracy denies she's crazy, just not as predictable as he thinks she is. Deirdre falls for the line and asks Tracy again if she's all right and is told she is. 'Does anyone want a drink?' Tracy asks before going into the kitchen. What a hostess.
Tracy comments to Charlie that that was really good. 'I could have been an actress,' she says. Charlie asks what it was to achieve other than giving the neighbours something to talk about. Tracy tells him it's to stop him from thinking she's just a little 'wifey-thing' and showing him that she can stick up for herself. Charlie just laughs. 'And I didn't like those plates anyway, so now you're going to have to get some new ones,' Tracy says. Just then flashing blue lights light up the street as the police come for a visit. The two police officers come into the house and Tracy sticks with the same storyof it being a game that she and Charlie were playing, 'But you see, no one's hurt and we're really sorry you got called out.'
'Well, apparently there was a lot of shouting,' the first officer says. 'But we were only joking,' Tracy replies. 'Well you, more than me,' Charlie adds. 'It's a strange kind of joking,' the other officer says. 'It's concerned your neighbours that much that they've called us.'
'Ah, well they're nice neighbours but they're a bit...over keen,' Tracy says.'Which neighbours are we talking about?' Charlie asks but is told they can't divulge that information. 'Right, so anyway, neither of you want to make a complaint against the other,' police officer says. 'Well I certainly don't,' Charlie says. Tracy pauses and then says that she doesn't want to make a complaint against Charlie.
The group at Ken and Deirdre’s discuss the events next door over tea and biscuits. Bev comments that Claire has become quite close to Tracy over the past couple of weeks. 'And what impression did you get?' Ken asks. 'Well, she's never said anything against him...' 'Like our Shelley never did,' Bev chimes in. 'But I've always got the feeling that she's hiding something,' Claire says. Gail comments that they weren't hiding anything tonight. Deirdre asks Claire if she thinks Tracy is afraid of Charlie, 'Yes, I do,' Claire responds. Did anyone think of asking Steve to join them?
Bev admits that she called the police when Claire went across to get Ken and Deirdre, and after what she heard tonight, would do it again. Ken identifies himself and Deirdre as Tracy's parents and asks what the police have found. 'We've been told it's all a bit of a misunderstanding,' one of the police officer says in disbelief, while the other officer asks what made Bev call them. Everyone tells their version of what went on next door and the police decide they'll start by taking everyone's names.
They all start to discuss their relationship, 'In fact, he threw her out a couple of weeks ago, and what did she do, but she came right back over here,' Ken tells the police. The police have heard enough and tell Ken they'll leave their cards and if Tracy wants to make a complaint, they'll take her seriously. 'In the meantime...' police officer starts, '...she says it's a game, she wants to stay there, and there's nothing you can do about it,' Ken finishes for him. 'We understand of course.'
Tracy tells Charlie that the police car is still there. 'It'll be there all week if they listen to everything that lot have to say at the end of which I'll be marched off in chains,' Charlie says as he pours a glass of wine. Tracy tells him he might be anyway if he goes off with another woman. They debate who it was who called the police and Charlie says, 'Whoever it was, you've given them all something to think about.' Tracy notices that the police are leaving and tells Charlie.
'So we're straight now are we? No more fun and games?' Charlie asks. 'Oh I wouldn't count on that,' Tracy replies. 'Well let me know when the next round is will you?' Charlie tells her as he walks into the kitchen.
'A lot sooner than you think,' Tracy says with a sneer...
Norris and Rita come out of the pub and spot the police, wondering what's gone on. Norris sees Chesney walking towards him with Schmeichel and says, 'Now see, the police are here and do you know why? They're coming to look for whoever sprayed that horrible graffiti.' 'It weren't me,' Chesney says.' 'And you've just admitted that you don't know who it is either,' Rita points out. 'Well they'll be coming to lock you up next time,' Norris tells Chesney.
Back at the Ranch
Vernon decides he has already put in a hard day’s work. 'I've just got to pop out the back. Let me know if you need a hand,' Vernon tells Liz.
In the back, Liz finds Vernon sprawled out on the couch in front of the telly. 'Are you not bored in here on your own?' she asks. 'No! Well it's your job out there. You don't want me under your feet all the time,' he replies. 'So, when you come back in here, it's because you're being considerate,' Liz says. 'Yeah, you could say that, yeah,' Vernon agrees. 'Or you could also say, and there's them saying it, that you come back here to get out of everyone's way because you're lazy and idle,' she expands. Vernon laughs and says, 'You know, people have always said that about me.' 'And you don't mind?' Liz asks. 'Well....they're wrong aren't they? Why should I mind when they're wrong?' Vernon asks. 'You mean you're too lazy to even be bothered that folk are saying you're lazy?' she asks. Vernon tells Liz that he thought she was on his side; she tells him she tries. Liz changes tack and asks Vernon if Michelle is trying to get off with Steve, but Vernon tells her he hasn't noticed anything. 'No, that would take too much effort wouldn't it. Well I'm sorry to have disturbed you!' Liz says. He puts his cowboy hat on and goes for a nap.
Liz decides it's time to have a word with Michelle about Steve and what she saw in the living room. 'I just want to know what's going on between you and my son,' Liz says. 'Now you don't have to tell me, you are both old enough to do what you like.' 'I'd have thought so,' Michelle replies. 'I just hope you're being honest with him and you're not leading him on for a bit of a laugh,' Liz says. 'Well if I was, I'm not any longer. And thanks for the reminder,' Michelle says. 'Reminder?' Liz puzzles. 'Of what I so nearly got myself into,' Michelle replies.
Steve asks Michelle if they can go somewhere after she finishes her shift. 'No, because, if we did, your mum would turn up two minutes later to see what we were getting up to,' Michelle tells him. Onlooker Les has a chuckle all to himself at Steve's knock back.
A scene later and Bill Webster does appear, only to be greeted by a, 'Hello stranger!' from Audrey. 'Audrey love, I wondered when it was that you'd get back from Canada,' Bill greets her. Audrey tells him that she thought he was supposed to be back in Germany, but Bill tells her he's got work over here. 'Did nobody tell you?' Bill asks. Audrey says, 'No, no, they didn't.' Bill has just made himself comfortable with Audrey when Rita and Norris come in. 'Oh hello you two. Mind if we join you?' Rita asks. 'I'll have a vodka and tonic Norris if you're asking.' 'I guess I don't have to now do I?' Norris mutters. Rita sits down and tells Bills and Audrey that she's had enough of Norris, as all he's done is moan. 'So, what are you doing back here?' she asks Bill.
Rita's ready to get in the next round but Bill takes a pass. Sally's keeping some dinner warm for him and he doesn't want to upset her like he did last time. 'Say ta ra to Audrey for me will you?' Bill asks as he gets up and leaves.
Just then Audrey returns from the ladies washroom and is disappointed that she's missed Bill. Rita offers her a drink and Audrey thanks her, says she's had enough, and takes off home.
The new ‘Mr. Baldwin’
Jamie tells Sean that he's had a phone call from Frankie and she's told Warren the news - and he's not happy. (No surprise.) He mentions that Frankie is going to stay in Spain a few more days to help Warren get his head around this news. (This might take a while.) Jamie tells Sean that he's going to go to the flat to have another look around and asks him if he wants to come.
Over at the flat, there is still no Danny. Jamie checks the phone messages and mail. There are two phone messages from Liam. Jamie pulls out a crumpled envelope and shows Sean, 'To whom it may concern: I leave everything and sign over all my assets to Jamie Baldwin.', and look, he's signed it,' Jamie says. 'Wow, you know what this means don't you? You're my new boss,' Sean says. 'Well, I don't know about that, but it certainly looks like he's not coming back,' Jamie replies.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Trapped in the Bedroom
Out on the street, Claire meets Ashley, who has just returned from dropping Joshua off for his first day of school. It went without incident which is a far cry from Bethany's first day when David told her that Dory from Finding Nemo was going to be her teacher and Bethany ended up at the bottom of the canal.
Tracy calls down from her second floor bedroom window to Claire to tell her that she's locked in her room again. Charlie suddenly shows up and asks what's going on.
"Your bedroom door handle's come off," Ashley says.
Charlie gives an "O RLY?" look and asks Tracy what's up.
Tracy looks embarrassed and flustered and asks him to forget. Charlie won't, of course, and heads upstairs to examine this troublesome door handle. Using his uncanny builder skills, he discovers that it's been unscrewed.
He asks if she did this, telling her that no gust of wind could knock off a whole doorknob. She claims she didn't even as he shows her the loose screws.
"Fine, don't believe me!" she claims.
He leaves to go down to van where a waiting Jason watches him try to work out Tracy's latest scheme. Deirdre comes by and tells Charlie that she's got her eye on him.
Charlie wonders aloud if Tracy is doing something she wants people to see.
Later Claire asks Tracy if Charlie locked her in to prevent her from leaving the house. Tracy denies but begs Claire not to say anything.
Later at Tracy's Charlie comes home to tell Tracy that he's got her planned all figured out. She was going to make people think of poor Tracy, having to live with the ogre Charlie and that's how she's going to get him back for Maria. He says he's disappointed that she didn't come up with something better.
As he leaves, Tracy says, "Something better, eh?"
Tracy goes over to her parents' where she asks them to look after Amy tonight as she is planning a "special night." Knowing what that means and fighting a wave of nausea, Deirdre agrees but asks Tracy is everything is alright, and mentions the whole "did Charlie trap you in the bedroom?" thing.
Tracy denies it, asking if she looks like someone who's trapped.
Charlie later comes home, where Amy is dispatched to her grandparents'. Charlie wants to know if she expects a "slap up" meal after her recent behaviour. Tracy says no and instead offers to cook (?) him a "slap up" meal.
Afterward, Tracy suggests for desert, they have a big ol' fashioned row. Charlie doesn't know what to say so Tracy leaves him there with his drink as she goes upstairs to get changed.
Into her rowing outfit, apparently.
More Godmothers Not Named Hayley
Claire asks Bev if she would be a godmother, alongside Eileen, to baby Freddy, I say, baby Freddy. Bev agrees and then, without consulting Claire nor Ashley, goes and books the Rovers for the after Christening do.
When she informs Claire of this, Claire refuses and says it'll be done at their home. Bev plays the "Fred would have wanted it in his old bar" car but Claire trumps with "Fred would have wanted it in his old home."
Bev hopes Claire doesn't think too badly of her because she didn't consult her first. Claire says no, but keep on about it and I will.
Mistletoe and Wine
At the Rovers, the employees dig out some Christmas decorations back from when Ena Sharples was holding court in the snug. Vern, all-around handy man, is nowhere to be found so it's up to Liz, Michelle, and Betty to put them up.
Steve spends much of the episode making jokes about getting a kiss from Michelle under the mistletoe. She warns him off, jokingly, but at the end, kisses him in the back room, where they are spotted by an unhappy Liz.
Vern, meanwhile, returns to find the decorations have been put up, but they aren't to his liking. He promises next year, he'll show Liz how to do it properly.
The Missing Baldwin
Danny is gone and this can only mean one thing: who's going to sign the factory girls' cheques?
First of all, who gets paid in cheque form anymore? Is there not direct deposit in Weatherfield?
Secondly, why doesn't Underworld outsource its payroll and HR like every other company? All they need is someone to submit the workers' hours every week (look, Sally just volunteered!) and this sort of thing is taken care of.
Anyhow, it turns out Danny signed a bunch of cheques before he left so that'll hold them until Liam figures out the next step. For his part, Paul isn't so sure about a business that has missing partners.
Meanwhile, Frankie is in Spain but she phones Jamie to tell him there is no sign of him.
Audrey finds out from Gail that Bill's in town. She spends the rest of the episode drinking in the Rovers, not listening to Gail prattle on about David's beater, and hoping that he'll show.
She's a Man Eater
The show opens with Tracey Barlow up to her old tricks. Spying Charlie coming up the street through the windows she hops right to the hoover and pretends to be cleaning the family room. Once Charlie steps into the room Tracey lets out a scream and now we see what she's up to. She wants Clair to hear her through the wall that separates their two homes. The best thing about this scene is that the microphone is clearly visable. Ah Corrie.
Tracey spends the next few moments convincing Charlie to go out for the evening claiming that she will be spending her time with the parents as they have just gotten back from sunny Portsmouth.
Later, Tracey has Amy, the uni-browed Oscar-contender sitting on the bed in her room. After Tracey removes the door handle she closes the door locking she and Amy in the bedroom. What is she to do now?
Well, she starts calling for Claire to help her out of her bedroom. Once Claire gets up there Tracey starts behaving like a defeated woman talking about her own fat behind saying that Charlie deserves a night out. Claire asks if Charlie has locked her in the bedroom and Tracey never denies it. She then swears Claire to secrecy. Right.
So later Claire tells Bev who stays sober long enough to tell Ken and Deirdry the second they get back on the street. Deirdry bee-lines it over to Tracey's place the second she hears the news.
Tracey opens the door and THIS is just over the top. She will only let her mother see one side of her face as if she's got a black eye. Tracey wont let Deirdry into the house and closes the door while her mom wails, "Tracey, you're breaking my heart." Get used to hearing that line Canuksters.
After being turned away by Tracey, Deirdry heads to Claire's place and goes for a smoke and a drink in the back yard.
Lovers in a Dangerous Time
Frankie and Jamie are now in the house and wondering about Danny's whereabouts. They don't really trust that he is gone so they go over to the flat and it is just as Danny left it before he and Jamie went for that nice drive.
Frankie is now worried that Danny has gone to see Warren in Spain. After calling Warren and discovering that nothing is amiss, she decides to head to Spain alone to talk with Warren. We all wish Frankie luck in telling her son that she is in love with his brother.
A Room of One's Own
Over at the Battersy-Browns Cilla still doesn't know that Lez and Yanna were knocking boots on the couch just a few days before. Fiz has made a nice fry-up for their tea but Chezney is eating dinner at a mate's place. They take this opportunity discuss turing the attic into a room for Chezney. I think Lez plans to do the work, but that can't be right.
Later just before Chezney comes home, Lez complains that he can hear Tracey yelling in the street. Cilla calls her "common" but that is not the only hilarious statement she makes. This is what follows:
Chezney tells his parents that his eyes were bigger than his stomach at dinner. Cilla says "I was like that when I was young. I got quite chubby. But, you get passed it." Beat. Then she says "Although, Fiz never did." Beat.
Cilla feels off and heads to bed. Gotta love her.
Send in the Clown
Gail heads over the road to chat with Kevin and the hung-over Sally. Our girl Sally is nursing some tea, poor thing. Gail talks to Kevin and asks him about buying a car for her David. At this point Sally chokes on her tea then does her best to recover without letting Gail know what she really thinks. This causes a bit of a nasty look from Gail. But, why she would expect any other reaction? It is common street knowledge that her son is a "dangerous psychopath."
Later in the house, Rosie and Sophie are hanging in the dining room. Rosie has just gotten a new haircut and looks amazing. Sally and Kevin arrive home with Bill and the girls are pleased to see him. Looks like Bill will be staying on the street until at least Christmas.
What about his wife who he stole from fred Elliot? What will Audrey say?
In Other News
The pub is alive with the sounds of nattering Janice. She is sitting with Kelly, Sean and Fiz talking about Carla Conner. The reaction is mixed but mostly bad. Janie thinks that Carla is a botoxed up senior citizen. Later they talk about their first memory.
The writers use this time to further explore the Connors and put Carla on display. As she walks into the pub Janice makes the first strike across the bar at Carla asking her if her first memory was outside of her cave. Very nice.
Carla clearly doesn't like the pub and tries to get a drink for Michelle. Liz is being nasty about Michelle for no reason and Carla while talking to the both of them says "By the way, that top doesn't suit you." Now, we al know that she is talking about Liz and we all know that she is right. But, Michelle gets her out of that.
Later Michelle spends some time chatting with the newest dark haired family on the street. Now, we are fully introducted to the Connors.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Suicide is Painless
The show opens with Danny and Jamie careening through the northern English countryside. Danny looking crazed, and Jamie scared. Theirs is a complex relationship, Jamie, very much the screw-up son and his philandering father. Really this scene was years in the making. Leanne and Frankie pushed them on to a road that was already paved.
Danny takes Jamie to bottle-drop bridge – it could even be the viaduct that borders the set – to have it out.
Meanwhile back on the street, Frankie is going out of her mind with worry and for some reason decides to go to the pub. Thankfully it is deserted except for Liz and Eileen holding up the bar. Just after Eileen complains about the lack of action in the pub, Frankie bursts in. She’s almost babbling when she tells them that it was Danny who beat up Jamie and now Danny has taken him off somewhere. As Liz and Eileen try to comfort/pull the information out of Frankie, her story falls apart completely and having no ability to say what is really going on, she exits the pub bound for home.
Back at the bridge Danny is now on the ledge and asking Jamie all sorts of questions, threatening to jump if Jamie doesn’t say that he will give up Frankie. Jamie will not lie and refuses to say that. The two of them go back and forth all the while Jamie pleads with Danny to get off the ledge.
Nothing is working until Jamie joins Danny on the ledge for a real father and son bonding moment.
Danny tells Jamie that he will give him everything, the flat, the car and the factory but Jamie doesn’t want any of it. But they come to an agreement and the two of them sit down while Danny writes a note saying that everything he owns is Jamie’s as “proof.” They also agree that no matter what happens, they cannot have a life together. When he hands it to Jamie he moves to slide backward off the bridge and Jamie grabs him saying “I don’t want you to die.” Danny tells him that he could just let go and it would be easy because no one would know.
Jamie says, “I’ll know” and then in the struggle Jamie says, “I can’t, dad, help me” Jamie must have wanted to utter these words for years every time Danny ridiculed Jamie for being lazy or hopeless on the pitch.
Jamie and Danny finally get off the bridge and after Jamie grabs the car keys, Danny kisses Jamie on the forehead and says, “You always were a sweet boy. My first baby.” And walks off into the night.
Exit: Danny Baldwin
Work Parties are Painful
It’s party night at Underworld and when we last saw the girls they were all decked out in their finery for a few drinks with the sewing machines. While talking with Carla (and feeding her the odd apple/salt lick) we see that her relationship with Paul is not exactly all roses and wine.
While Carla is clearly a nasty piece of work she does convince Liam to get cabs to the real party location – The Italian (oh bliss). She is a very strong personality and first refuses to let Fiz sit with them (and who wouldn’t want to have dinner with Fiz? She is obviously evil). Then she encourages Liam with his Mr. Connor stupidity, makes Paul leave early and the gives Kelly a dressing down (which Kelly may have deserved, even though I love Kelly).
There will be more of Carla Connor, that is one thing we can be sure of.
Norris is a Pain in the Ass
Amber, a favourite of the Corrie Canuksters, walks into the Kabbin close to closing time for some midget gems or lemon drops and the lights are off. We se Amber through the lenses of what must be Norris’ night vision goggles. As he approaches Amber he tells her that he’d like to eat her liver with a nice chianti. While it makes sense to fear for Norris’ sanity, he isn’t exactly a scary man. Norris explains that he is just quoting that movie that Emily loves (Emily loves Silence of the Lambs?).
Back at home, now Emily has donned that night vision goggles and is creeping up on Norris quoting the same movie. Except Emily only saw the trailer and she thinks the film is disgusting. This makes more sense because I really can’t picture Emily watching Silence of the lambs with her church group after the Sunday service.
Norris starts his informal neighbourhood watch and while he is supposed to be watching the shop, he spends a bit of time watching his neighbours. We see Rita outside in her housecoat, some random dog peeing on a lamp post and then Norris strikes gold. There, standing him her bedroom with Charlie is a topless Tracey Barlow who catches Norris looking at her.
Norris immediately calls for Emily and tells her what happened and they Tracey “may have gotten the wrong idea.” Because Norris wasn’t really looking into her bedroom with night vision goggles? No, wait he was.
Tracey and Charlie come storming over and give Norris what-for. Charlie gets rough with him. Charlie is a bully.
Feel free to talk amongst yourselves in the comment section here.
Oh, and pray for my safe return.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Chesney is worried about Cilla dying, and Les does his best to cheer Ches up. Then Cilla comes down, and Les does his best to take care of Cilla.
Later, Cilla decides that she must tell Yana what is going on. She goes out with Les trailing after her. Realizing that Les seems worried, Cilla warns him that if he has been up to something, she’ll “wheedle it out of ya.” Ah, the foreboding. She enters the chip shop. Yana is clearly worried when Cilla says she needs to talk. At least she is not relieved when Cilla tells her she has cancer.
Later on, at the Rover’s, Les, Cilla and Yana discuss Cilla’s cancer. Yana wants to know what she can do.
“Just be a mate,” Cilla says.
“I will always be one of them.” Cilla does not catch the irony.
They all leave Rover’s, Yana goes one way, and Les and Cilla the other. Les pretends he forgot his cigarettes, and returns to meet Yana. They speak, agree it was a “one off” and decide that they will never breathe a word about messing around. Unfortunately, Ches hears it all.
Cut to Ches entering the house, wanting to talk to his mother. Les suggests he help Chesney with his homework upstairs. Ches wants to speak to Cilla, but Cilla assures him that she does not need to speak about the cancer. She leaves the room. Les then says that he doesn’t know what Chesney heard, but it “wasn’t serious.” Chesney asks if Les will take care of his mum. Les swears his love for Cilla and says he will take care of her. Ches agrees to keep mum.
The Dripster Takes Charge
Gail runs into Claire on the street as Claire is knocking on Tracey’s door to see if she will come out to play. Claire tells Gail that she and Tracey are becoming mates. Gail says: “Tracey doesn’t have mates. What’s she using you for?” Claire says she isn’t so bad, confesses she is worried about her, and asks Gail to keep an eye out for her. Gail agrees, but says: “Don’t you put your trust in her. She a right little… minx.” As Gail walks away, Claire sees Tracey’s curtains flutter.
Later, Claire confronts Charlie in her Claire sort of way. She tells him that she has been around to see Tracey, but Tracey is not answering the door and she is worried about her. Charlie puts her off in his charming sort of way, telling her Tracey is just fine.
When he goes home, though, he confronts Tracey about her odd behaviour. Why are the drapes drawn so early? Why is avoiding Claire when she would normally: “go up to the door, tell her to get stuffed, and tell her how best to do it.” Tracey confesses that she wants friends, and wants to hang out with Claire, but not as often as Claire wants. So she can’t tell her to get stuffed, or she won’t be her friend, will she?
Apparently a pot of carrots is central to the scene, as there is a long shot of Charlie moving them from the counter to the table.
The Crime Wave Continues
Norris is once again cleaning off the front of the Kabin when Amber strolls up. When Norris complains that he hasn’t been able to catch the fiend that is destroying his beloved Kabin, because he can’t see out at night as the lights in the neighbourhood aren’t very good, Amber suggests night vision goggles.
Later, at the Rover’s, Norris seems intent on a new plan. Rita does not approve.
Then, back at the Kabin, Norris shows off his new night vision goggles. Rita, perhaps concerned that everyone will know she is trapped in a silly plot line, asks him not to where them outside.
That’s Mrs. Connor to You
It is the day of the Christmas party at the factory.
During the workday, there is far too much talk about whether Liam should be addressed as Mr. Connor or as Liam.
After the workday, Kelly takes Liam’s photo with her phone while Liam changes, shows it around, and then has it taken away and the photo deleted by Liam, who will have none of it.
At the party, Liam and his sibs are there, the workers are all there, but Danny is not.
Sally and Kelly scrap. Sally wants wine, Kelly suggests she just shut up and have beer. Sally says that beer is a “man’s drink” and the reason Kelly drinks it is because she looks like drag queen.
Then, a rather glam stranger turns up bearing wine, and announces she is Carla, Paul’s beloved wife. Everyone appear surprised she exists, and Paul looks uncomfortable she is there.
Bizarre Love Triangle
Danny survives the night, and wakes up to a messy house.
At that very same moment, Frankie and Jamie are pretending to be a normal couple. They speak teasingly to each other.
“Are you saying I am fat?” Frankie asks.
“No, I’m saying you are pregnant perfect,” he replies.
The two traipse upstairs for some mother-son bonding time.
Afterwards, Frankie is unhappy. Not because she has just bed her son, but, she explains to Jamie, because she feels she needs to tell Warren about them, face-to-face, and alone.
Evening comes. Danny wanders around aimlessly in his apartment, and then, suddenly, he seems to make a decision. He leaves the apartment.
Frankie and Jamie are leaving their house, and Danny, who has been parked, lurking and waiting for them, comes tearing up the street to them.
“I thought we’d have a proper chat, man to man,” he says to Jamie after he pulls up the car to them. Frankie protests, but Jamie agrees. Off they go. Frankie madly phones Jamie on his cell phone. As he goes to answer it Danny grabs it and throws it out the window. Danny is driving very quickly. Jamie asks him to slow down.
“Just you and me son on our own. We are going to finish this tonight,” Danny says as he speeds through a red light.
Friday, August 24, 2007
The Bronx has hit Weatherfield again, as the talented graffiti artist has struck the Kabin. Norris moans that they should bring back National Service, that would put a stop to it all. Rita and Emily are both of the opinion that it is quite well done, with nice colours. "Quite arty really," says Emily. Norris is outraged. Any guess as to what it says?
Norris plans to stay awake all night, with the aid of strong coffee, and keep watch to see who is painting the graffiti on the Kabin walls and windows. He informs Emily that if he sees the perpetrator he intends to make a citizens arrest. "Please Norris, no heroics," says Emily, worried. Norris should ask Charlie for his camera surveillance kit.
Ghost of Christmas Past
Another person who is outraged is Ashley, who has just opened their first Christmas card to find it's from Matt Ramsden asking when he can see Josh over Christmas. Claire mentions that they were expecting it, and Ashley sighs, but agrees. Eileen comes along and Claire asks how she's finding the Religious Instruction. (Does she ever give up?) Eileen smiles and says it's the highlight of her week. Bev butts in and says they could have avoided all this by picking someone who had already been baptised to be godparent. Claire asks Eileen if she minds doing it all. Eileen grits her teeth and assures her she doesn't.
In the Peacock house, Ashley is still worrying about Matt Ramsden's card, but Claire tells him that they're good now, and they have a lot to look forward to. She thinks that Christmas will bring a lot to look forward to, and a chance to welcome Freddie into the world properly. She says that she still worries that Freddie will know that at first she didn't love him, "What if I've scarred him for life?" she says. Ashley starts to say that she's getting better every day, when she stops him. "Listen – I'm sure I can hear Tracy crying next door."
True Blue Friend
Yana sees Cilla getting on a bus and goes straight round to Les and says, "She's left you, hasn't she?" He sighs, "That's it, she's gone," he says, "married a year and already playing away." Yana asks if Cilla actually said she was seeing someone, but Les seems to think that as she didn't actually deny it, it's an admission of guilt. Yana is shocked because she thought Cilla told her everything. Les wails, "I love her, Yana!" Yana tells him she doesn't deserve him, and then, like the wonderful friend that she is she moves in on Les and starts to kiss him. My stomach hurts.
Over at Fizz's flat, Cilla tells her daughter that the hospital has had a cancellation and so can fit her in that day. They're going to take some more skin and see how far the cancer has spread. Fizz tells Cilla she should tell Les, but Cilla is furious. "No," she says, "why should I after he accused me of having an affair and all sorts!" Fizz wants to go with her but Cilla tells her to go to work, and that the best thing she can do is to carry on as normal.
Fizz goes to the Battersby house to find Les sitting sullenly, beer can in hand. "Sent you to do her dirty work has she?" he snaps, and tells her to forget it, he's going to make a bonfire of all Cilla's stuff. Fizz tries to tell him he's got it all wrong. "You'd better brace yourself, I've got some bad news," she tells him. He starts to says he reckons she's shacked up with a couple of blokes in Moss Side. (Look at the link, under “Notable People")
He then drags the sunbed into the back yard. "This thing is killing her, it's my fault!" he cries, and kicks it. Chesney shouts at him to stop as he picks up a brick and hammers the sunbed with it. Les collapses, crying. "It's all my fault! oh Cilla! I want to see her!" The whole family arrives to see Cilla in hospital. Chesney throws himself on his mum's bed and tells her that he loves her. Les takes her hand and says that they all love each other. Cilla looks really pleased and says, "Yes." Awww.
Over at the the Local
Violet is shocked to see the state of Jamie's face. He tells her he got into a fight in town. She tells him to look after himself and he says he'll try.
Claire is telling Bev about Tracy, and how she thinks she's genuinely unhappy. Bev says she has no sympathy for her, she was vile to Shelley and she reminds Claire that she hasn't exactly been sweetness and light to her, either.
Eileen is at the bar, and seeing Jamie, jokes to Frankie, "What did he do? Leave his underpants on the floor again?" (Little does she know…) There's a long silence, and she says awkwardly, "Sorry, I was only making joke….I can see you've had a pasting." Frankie reassures her it's her, she's had a sense of humour failure. "Me and Danny have split up," she explains. Eileen is shocked. "Why?" she asks her. Frankie tells her it was never going to work, and it's for the best.
Oh Danny Boy
Danny turns up at the factory, much to Liam's surprise. He starts to tell Danny all the things that need doing, but then sees that Danny isn't really his usual self. He tells him it will all keep till later, to give him time to settle back in.
Over at the factory it's break time, and the girls are chattering about Christmas when Danny comes over. Sean asks if he's all right, he looks a bit peaky. Danny replies that he's fine, but would love a cuppa and a custard cream. Joanne goes to put the kettle on. The talk goes back to Christmas, and how they love sharing it all with their families. "That's what Christmas is about," says Jo, "spending time with the people you love." At that point Danny turns and walks out of the factory, without a word to anyone. You just want to give Danny a hug.
Liam goes round to Danny's to get him to sign for the wages withdrawal. Danny signs and Liam tells him he didn't even look at it, it could have been anything. "You're taking it hard then, this Frankie thing?" he asks him. "Well spotted, that man," says Danny. Liam asks if there's anything he can get him, food, bottles of the hard stuff? "Look," says Liam, kindly, "if there's anything I can do….." Danny tells him there are some things that can't be fixed.
Danny is alone at the viaduct, in the dark, drinking. He sways precariously on the wall, holding out the empty Scotch bottle. He lets it go and there's a few moments silence till it hits the ground far below. He looks down, still swaying. Don’t jump!
That would be a 'No'.
And yes I remember dancing to this at 'Pat and Marios' at Younge and Eglington (aka Young and Eligible) back in the day....so NOW who's old?
Freddy Mercury on the other hand....
(If anyone can find the Corrie version of this, pleae let me know.)
I take it back, he can sing.
This was the best I could find and it's very short and definately NOT workplace safe, but if you are at home and you don't mind cussing...here's Eddie singing properly.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
OK Corrie Canuksters, I have a fun little trivia question. I came across this famous Corrie quote. Tell me who said it and who it is in reference to.
"Skirt no bigger than a belt, too much eyeliner, and roots as dark as her soul!"
This actually isn’t that difficult, and it is so funny it makes me wanna cry.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
We begin where we left off last night at the doctor's office. The doctor, who looks a bit like French President Nicolas Sarkozy, refers to the melanoma they removed last week.
"Melanoma!" she cries, "it was a mole last week!"
He tells her that there was a biopsy, which indicated a malignant melanoma. There will be treatment, but they will need to determine how far the cancer has spread.
Cilla looks like she was punched in the stomach.
“Cancer!” she whispers.
On the sidewalk in front of Les', Fiz tells him that she's sent Chesney back to school as he just should carry one as normal. Yana notes that Cilla letting him down again is carrying on as normal.
Back at the hospital, the doctor tells Cilla that skin cancer can be very aggressive so they will get her in as soon as possible. She wants to know what “the maths” are: 90%? 55? 2%.
He tells her that it was the melanoma was deep, but not very deep, but her chances for for survival over 5 years would be 30% to 50%.
"I never do anything by halves, me," she says.
As Cilla comes home and stops to check her make up. Les and Yana come out to confront her. Yana makes a reference to about her lipstick just sliding off her face, and instructs Les not to believe anything she says. Yana tells her she's resigned.
"From the chippy?" asks Cilla.
"No," says Les, "from being your flaming alibi!"
Yana, not angry that Cilla is having an affair but that she didn't tell her, walks off. Les goes back inside, slamming the door.
Inside the house, Cilla picks a half-empty bottle of hooch.
"Been having a party?" she asks.
Les tells that everything was all right before she came back and it will be all right again once she
slings her hook. He tells her he heard her telling Yana to lie for her, he was standing beside her.
Cilla sees Yana's top on the chair and wonders if they were up to a little fun themselves. Les says he never cheated, well, except that one time with Janice.
Les says that he and Chesney will be better off without her.
"You might just have to be," she says.
"You mean nothing to me and you never did!" he shouts. Cilla runs upstairs.
Cilla turns up at Fizz's flat, but Fizz gives her hell for the affair, calling her an evil cow.
"And what? You'd be better off without me?" Cilla asks.
Fizz says that she always has been.
"Just remember you said that," says Cilla and picks up her bag and walks out.
Later, Cilla goes back to Fizz's and blurts out on the intercom that she has cancer. In Fizz's flat,
her daughter has trouble believing it. Cilla shows her where the melanoma was removed (her
chest), saying that was why she wouldn't let Les near her.
“No wonder he thought I was having a flaming affair," she says, "I wish I was."
"Oh Mam!" says Fizz.
Liam is trying to get hold of Danny as there is a business meeting that day. He tries to get Sean to tell him what's up but Sean has no idea where he is and he isn't about to tell Liam what's really going on in that family.
Meanwhile, Danny is standing on a viaduct, at what looks like a Norman castle, overlooking some lush green hills.
It's dark now and Danny gets a call from Warren. He tells him that Port Vale has rejected him. Danny, trying to keep it together, tells him not to feel too down, and tells his son he loves him. Danny, who is sitting on the edge of the viaduct, gets up and walks back to his car.
Danny comes back to the office where he is confronted by Liam. He finally tells him that Frankie has left him and that he'll be taking some time off. Liam says he can handle the shop while he's gone.
Tracy is still lying on the sofa pretending to be sick. She tells Charlie to go to the Rovers and get his own dinner as all the food in the house is past its sell-by date and she's not hungry. He finds a note on the doormat from Claire asking if Tracy would like to go for a drink that evening. Tracy says she'd rather boil her own head. As soon as Charlie's gone to the Rovers', Tracy gets up and pulls the expired food out of the garbage.
In the Rovers, Claire is worrying about Tracy, and wondering if she got her note, or if Charlie found it first. Ashley tells her she's being paranoid and would rather not be joined by Tracy and Charlie.
Charlie comes into the Rovers and tells Claire that Tracy is still under the weather and didn't feel up to going out.
"Clearly you did though," says Claire.
Charlie says that Tracy wanted him out from under her feet.
"She said thanks for the note," he adds, confirming Claire's suspicion that Charlie got the note first.
"She could be dead for all we know!" declares Claire.
Later, Tracy is by her front door, waiting to see Ashley and Claire coming out. When she does, she rushes outside and hurriedly scrapes an expired meal into the garbage bin. Claire calls out to her and Tracy pretends to be surprised to see her. Claire asks if she got the note, but Tracy says “what note”, and scuttles back inside.
"See!" says Claire to Ashley.
In Other News
Gail is going to buy David a non-functioning car for him to work on so he can learn about responsibility and engines and stuff. Knowing David, you can imagine how this will all work out.
When David gets the car running, Gail will then give him a bottle of scotch to teach him about drunk driving.
Jason is making headway in his courtship of Sarah.
Norris is still blaming the Battersbys for the graffiti, because he's a prejudiced arse.
Man Suspects Wife is Playing Away, Has no Clue of Truth
The show opens with Cilla in the dining room and Les bounding down the stairs complaining about the lack of nuptials in his life. He's obviously hurt and angry that Cilla passed on the curry take-away and lager anniversary extravaganza. Noticing that Cilla has put her slap on and is looking like a right bobby dazzler he ask where she's off to. She tells him that she's got plans to go out with Yanna. Likely story.
Later, Lez sees Yanna in the street, for which, she is perfectly dressed (seriously one of the BEST outfits I have seen on the street – Rosemond or Queen East). Lez asks her if she and Cilla are going out seeing as she left the house looking like "full totty on the lot.*" Yanna calls Cilla and gets nowhere. Assuming that Cilla is playing away and hasn't told her, Yanna is put out. Her reaction is… questionable.
Meanwhile Cilla walks into what looks like a medical clinic, the speculations of the Corrie Canuksters are confirmed. Cilla may well be sick.
As Cilla is at the clinic Yanna makes it back to the Battersby-Brown house bringing Lez a special order of fish (please, keep the sophomoric humour to yourself, Papa Smurf). Lez, Yanna, Fiz and Chezney all find themselves wondering is Cilla is up to her old tricks.
Sadly, this is the one time we wish she were up to no good. Cilla meets with Dr. Street Totty** and the two get ready to go over her test results.
Remember folks, this was the first of a double episode that aired on a Monday night in the UK. Be ready to start with Clla tomorrow when we find out what Dr. Street Totty has to say.
*I’ll have all Corrie Canuk readers know that the phrase “full totty on the lot” is how one may choose to describe how I look on any given day.
**I know what you're thinking. You are thinking that Dr. Street Totty isn't that hot. I argue that they dressed that man down. He's got potential. If he had a shave and better hair, he'd be Dr. Delicious.
Local Man Identifies 11 Year-Old as Petty Crime King Pin
In a bit of classic Corrie storytelling, there is a vandal on the street. Norris has found some graffiti on the wall of the shop and he blames Chezney – the only young person he knows. Chezney refuses to take the blame for the graffiti and goes off to school. Good for Chezney.
Later Norris is cleaning the wall and has decided that if there is indeed a cadre of can wielding hooligans Chezny is the mastermind behind them. Rita doesn't take him seriously and walks back into the Kabin.
Norris really is a special person.
Local Meth Addict Runs Café, This Time, Scores Only Points
Due to Roy's visit to an old aunt* and Frankie's being busy committing incest over the road, Becky has to run the café on her own. She does a bang up job. Making a couple off colour jokes about salmonella and rats doesn’t sit well with Blanche who, for some reason, has made the café her business. Ushering Snug out of the restaurant makes Blanche that much more peevish. The two of them have a couple verbal sparring matches (my personal favourite part is when Becky calls Blanche "Flower"). During these scenes one has to wonder if Becky could be Blanche's long lost granddaughter. Personally, I’d like Becky and Blanche to join forces and run for mayor or something.
Hailey pops by every so often only to see that Becky is running the café like a star. Roy gets home and is surprised to see that everything was fine. Who knew a meth addict could run a café?
*Both Roy and Hailey seem to be the only characters who have elderly aunts and uncles living elsewhere that they have to tend to.
Mother/Adoptive Son Love Story Tests the Limits of Good Taste
Jamie is looking at his battered reflection and fusses with a scab on his face. Frankie tells him, "It won't get better if you keep poking at it." Moms always have the best advice. As these two talk I think to myself that the writers do a good job dancing around the taboo that is the sensual relationship between mother and son. All of their embraces are very mother/lover mix. It grosses me out.
Frankie tells Jamie why she went to see Danny alone the night before. Poor Jamie just isn't experienced enough to know that you gotta be cruel to be kind. Frankie had to go and rip Danny's heart out (then throw it on the floor before she shoved the heel of her stiletto through it) so that he would stop grasping at any imagined shred of hope.
Anyway, the two of them seem to be hiding out in the house and Danny seems to be wigging out in the car. He skulks around the street and as soon as Liam sees him he takes off. He's just driving, man. Just driving.
Later Liam goes to see Frankie and gets over the weird incest vibe long enough to ask her if she knows where Danny is. She doesn't. What is happening there?
Corrie Writers Beg Fans not to Forget About Sarah and Jason
For once in her life Sarah is making someone work for it.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
Frankie is tending to Jamie's many wounds. He says they need to work out what to tell people, but she wants to wait. She points out that people will ask about his injuries and there is the whole public reaction thing. And the lack of Hallmark cards for when you leave your husband for your (step)son. Jamie tries to be optimistic, but Frankie is more realistic. She tells him that whatever happens, they'll have to be strong. Because torch-bearer villagers and their pitchforks can really smart.
Later, Frankie is hanging the washing out in the yard. Suddenly Danny is there.
"Stay away from us," Frankie tells Danny.
He says he doesn't want to hurt anyone, but yesterday all he saw was read and couldn't think straight.
He says he wants to start with a clean slate, just as he did with Leanne and Frankie did with Jamie, ergo they're "quits." He thinks they can start again from scratch. She looks at him in amazement as Jamie comes out of the house.
"You really are mental," she says. Jamie tells his Dad to get out.
"Just go, please," Frankie says, and they walk into the house and shut the door.
Frankie is again hanging out the washing in the yard and is startled
Sean tells her it's sweet that she's doing Jamie's laundry and asks if Danny knows all about their little secret. But he sees Jamie on the doorstep, all battered and bruised, and gets his answer.
In the house, Jamie has made everyone a nice cup of tea as that fixes everything. That, and onion bhajis, but more on that story later.
Sean wants to know if Danny caught them by accident. Jamie thinks there could have some other reason for Danny to find out and Sean confesses that he did tell Danny he didn't want to know about his family's dirty little secrets.
"I could have been talking about Leanne for all he knew."
He tells Jamie he must have know "it would all end in tears" (drink!). Jamie says it's just the beginning. Sean asks if they think the two of them are going to live happily ever after. "You know as well as I do that Danny ain't gonna give up that easily."
Later at Danny's flat, Frankie comes 'round to see him, unbeknownst to Jamie.
Frankie confirms Danny he's living in a dream and that there will be no reconciliation.
"You and me are finished." She says the previous reconciliation but it was all a sham to stop her from facing up to the truth that she loves Jamie.
Danny thinks it's just been her revenge on him and Leanne. Frankie denies this.
"We did what we did because we love each other," she says.
Danny says it's Frankie who's dreaming because if she really meant all that she said, she wouldn't be visiting him alone.
Frankie says bringing Jamie would have been too emotional. She can deal because she doesn't feel anything for Danny any more, it's all just void. This brings Danny to tears.
"I'll let you get on with your life," she says, as she prepares to leave. "What's left of it."
And with that, a free woman leaves her ex-husband to start a new life of romance with
Anyone Who Says No to Bhajis is Sick
Les writes out a first anniversary card for Cilla. He thinks she's just been a bit down and the card could help cheer her up, despite Fizz and Kirk's assertion that it's adultery. As she comes downstairs, he asks if she knows what day it is. It's Sunday, apparently.
"Now bog off and stop pestering me," she says.
In the Rovers, Les and Yana discuss the Cilla situation. Les thinks she's having an affair, but Yana claims she'd know if she was. After a bit of flirting, she tells Les the best thing is to put on a romantic dinner.
Later, Les asks Kirk and Fizz if they can stay away that evening while he treats Cilla to an anniversary surprise.
"Tell her you know what she's up to," suggests Fizz. "That'll surprise Cilla."
Back at the Battersby-Browns', Les is lighting a candle on the table. He's wearing his best black shirt and presents Cilla with an anniversary card and a gift: a framed photo of their wedding day. She apologises and says she forgot.
She seems quite touched and she says the framed wedding picture "is all right, I suppose. I hope you didn't pay too much for that frame."
He's picked up a gourmet Indian banquet for two, and the lager's in glasses, not cans. Cilla says she doesn't want it and begins weeping and gets testy. She claims she's tired and has a headache and just wants a bath and an early night.
Les can't understand it. It's their first anniversary. He asks her to at least have an onion bhaji, but she rushes upstairs, telling him not to wake her up when he comes to bed.
Hayley's a Right Mug
Becky turns up for work in the cafe, even though it's her day off. Hayley is worried, because she's got to go into town and won't be there.
"Just as well I did come in then," Becky says. "Vezza won't be able to cope on her own if there's a rush on."
"What did you call me?" Vera asks.
Becky goes to hang up her coat, giving Hayley a chance to explain to Vera that she's talked to Becky and things might be better. Becky comes back and tells Hayley she's got nothing to worry about.
Later, Vera tells Blanche that the till has been £20 down since Becky began working there. She explains that she's keeping a close eye on Becky to protect Roy and Hayley's interests.
They're interrupted by Becky, who comes over to show them a £10 note she found under the fridge.
In the cafe, Blanche wants to know if any more stray bank notes have turned up. "You know, I wouldn't mind her cleaning my house if she gets results like that!"
Blanche tells Vera it will all be a front to make them think Becky's not thieving any more.
"For every tenner she finds, she'll pocket another two!" They clam up as Becky comes over. She says the last customer has just given her a fiver as a tip. Blanche asks if it will be drinks on Becky later, but she says she won't be keeping the money as it wouldn't be right, what with her being new. She gives it to Vera to put in the till. "Fifteen quid and counting," Vera says triumphantly to Blanche when Becky goes. "Fools' gold," says Blanche. "Hayley's welcome to it."
When she leaves, Vera tells Hayley that the till appears to be £20 up. Becky might be giving back what she stole, "but it's a rum way of doing it," she adds. Hayley says at least it's a step in the right direction.
Claire Peacock Investigates
Tracy is sacked out on the Chesterfield with a comforter. She's coughing and such and Charlie is offering her sympathy and offers to pick up something for dinner. As he drives off, Tracy is up and peers through the curtains to make sure he's gone.
As she walks down the street, Claire sees that Tracy's curtains are still drawn. Unseen by Claire, Tracey watches her from behind the curtains, smiling to herself.
And since when is Dev so chummy with Charlie?
Claire quietly tells Bev, who's nearby, that she thinks Tracy is afraid of Charlie, what with the curtains drawn. Bev admits that he can see the parallels between what happened with Shelley and Sunita and what is happening now. She expresses concern for Tracy's mental health, then goes back to slugging gin, hugging Fred's urn, and crying "just ten more minutes!"
In Other NewsGail disapproves of Sarah hanging around Jason.
Blanche disapproves of naming children "Freddy."
This means the updates are going to be a bit bumpy until we can get back into our groove. So until everything settles down, I’ll fill in the spots with at least the bare minimum. I might not have time to do a full out update with my regular rapier wit, but you’ll get something to talk about.
So here is your Friday’s update – cut for time.
Danny sulks in his flat with the blind closed while Frankie and Jamie debate when they’re going to break the happy news that they’re in love to the townsfolk. Sensing that Clair and Blanche won’t be throwing her a shower, Frankie suggest that they wait awhile before making the announcement.
They head over Danny’s flat and he calmly invites them up for some coffee. This civility last for about a minute when he finally tells them that they are sick and Glacia agrees.
Frankie goes into the bedroom to get her clothes while Danny says that Jamie is doing this not because he loves Frankie but because he hates Danny. I didn’t catch the entire bit because the phone rang. It was Oedipus asking for his storyline back.
There’s much arguing and in the end Danny says that he won’t have any of this sick affair in his house and grabs Frankie’s luggage to haul it into the van. As he gets near the van he throws it, but it breaks and opens up, spilling her clothes all over the place.
He tries to pick her stuff up and then pleads with her to come back to her, and at that point Jamie rushes Danny into van. KABLOOOEY! Then the fight. POW! KABOW! FLLLLLLLUWOA! Danny tells Jamie that he loves him just before he delves a hard blow to his stomach. KEEEEPAW! Danny gets in a few good hits and it seems like he’s winning until Jamie pushes him into the water. KERSPLUSH! But Danny hasn’t let go of Jamie so the fight continues in the water SMACH! CRUNPUNCH! And Jamie’s looking bad! GULP GULP he goes down and out of Danny’s sight.
Frankie, meanwhile, goes into labour on the dock. Oh maybe not, but she is screaming.
Danny realizes that Jamie is unconscious and drowning so he goes down into the water and drags him up.
They get him on the dock, where he’s not breathing. Frankie performs something that I think she believes to be mouth to mouth, and somehow that works and he revives spitting up water and such.
Danny is really a mess and tries to explain that he didn’t mean to hurt Jamie and that he loves him. Frankie tells him to get away and that she did have doubts about her relationship with Jamie, but she doesn’t now.
No love, you should still have doubts.
My two cents about the fight. Typically you’d think that Jamie could win because he has youth on his side, but I think Danny is in good shape for his age and in addition, I suspect Danny’s been in a lot more fights than the walking hair-do we call Jamie.
Claire meets Tracey on the street and makes arrangements to go out later that night. Tracey agrees.
Later, when Clair is hanging up the laundry, Tracey does a fake phone call with Charlie near an open window in which she pretends that sexy bastard refuses to baby-sit. She tells Claire the bad news with a Sad Bear face.
Rita comes home and we find out that it was Norris who was responsible for her fall. Apparently there’s no bread in Hungary and when he saw a fresh roll at the hotel restaurant he tripped up Rita in order to secure it. (We later find out that the roll was a bit dry and not worth the agro.)
Rita is bummed about having to had stay in an Hungarian hospital and getting thrombosis, but Emily tells her there’s an important lesson to be learned. Give the baby his g.d. pen to begin with and then you don’t have to share the holidays with him. (Although even if she had given him the pen, I’m sure he would have demanded to be on the trip.)
Norris comes back to the Kabin with a peace offering, a pair of comfy trainers for her to walk in. Rita loves them until she finds out that blink as she walks. He’s gotten her a pair of kid’s shoes.
Rita attempts to kill him.
Becky meets up with that weasely guy from the café that she knows. She gives him cigarettes saying she can easily get more, which Haley overhears from around the corner.
Then they have the most weasely of al weasely kisses. It’s all large noses, skinny arms and unwashed hair. Glacia shudders but STILL thinks it’s better than having to watch Frankie and Jamie.
Anyway, Haely and Becky have a girl chat on the Maxine Peacock death bench which makes an special appearance. Haley suggest that Becky can do better than weasel boy and that she should have a bit more self respect. She then asks Becky outright if she’s been stealing and surprise, surprise Becky lies and is insulted that Haley would even ask.
One observation, Haley was this sweater in the factory that was a nice colour and actually had some frill on it. Could it be that Haley is buying from a clothing store? Up to this point I thought she was catologue shopping.
Friday, August 17, 2007
It was to be Tracey, but there's been a switch and instead Wendi Peters aka Cilla will be gracing us.
I hope she brings Yana.
Gail sees Eileen and Jason just coming out of their house across the street, and glares. Eileen remarks to her son that Gail looks about as pleased as she is. Jason tells her that it is only the movies and he's got loads of work to do yet. Just then an excited Claire comes running up. She's elated to tell Eileen that she can be Freddie's godmother after all, the vicar has agreed to baptize her beforehand. Eileen looks less than thrilled by this news, and says that it would be wonderful, but “She doesn't know the first thing about God”. Claire says excitedly that it's not a problem, the vicar has agreed to give her all the religious instruction she needs! You can tell that Eileen is ecstatic at the prospect.
Les asks Fizz in the café if she thinks Cilla's having an affair. Fizz says she is not sure, but Cilla has got form. She also says that there might be a perfectly innocent explanation, but Les thinks that “there's no smoke without 'a flamin' bonfire!'
All the talk is about the darts match that's coming up that evening, where the workers are playing for the prize of a Christmas party. Liam tells them that the team consists of himself, Danny, his brother and their sister Michelle. When Janice gripes that she is nothing to do with Underworld he tells her that she's family and that makes her almost management, and anyway, without her there would be no team and no teams means no match and no match means no Christmas party. Janice then agrees that Michelle can play at the match.
As Danny walks into the factory, Janice stops him and asks if their Christmas meal will include drinks. Danny is blank, so Joanne tells him about their staff meal if they win the darts match. Danny still looks blank so Hayley suggests he asks Mr. Connor. Danny goes into the office and tells Liam that he thought he made it clear that they were not shelling out for a staff dinner. Liam says they're not, because they won't win. He and his brother and sister have all been playing since they were children and that Paul is County standard. Danny thinks that if the management win they ought to get something – that would make it much more appealing.
In the pub, the girls ask Michelle, “ What's in it for her”. Michelle doesn't have a clue what they're talking about, so they explain about the darts tournament. They tell her that Liam has said she's playing that night, and she is quite resentful about the fact that he hasn't asked her first. Steve is listening to all this, and says that she should save herself the humiliation. "Humiliation?" asks Michelle, and he goes on to explain that she's not exactly the darts type. "Whereas Fizz and Janice…." He begins, and then notices them glaring at him. Vernon comes along at this point. "What my friend is saying Michelle," he tells her, "is it's not your game, it's highly technical. It's all in the wrist." Looking aggravated, she tells him he must be an expert then. She then tells the girls that, thanks to Steve and Vernon, she is going to play – and she's going to win!
Danny is in the cafe, talking to Frankie about Warren. He asks if she'll come to the darts match, but she says she'll give it a miss.
Hayley comes in and asks Vera where Becky is, and is told she's out the back getting her coat. "Best place for her," says Vera, "Fingers like fly-paper, that one." She then tells Hayley about Becky's “friend” who had a full breakfast and three coffees and never paid. Vera tells Hayley that she thinks Becky is taking her and Roy for “Right mugs”.
In the pub, it all rests on Paul's final score. He seems to be doing very well with his first two darts, but the last dart, that would win the match for them, hits the board and falls out on the floor. Janice takes her turn and scores just what is needed – the workers have won. Hurrah! Danny gets his coat and leaves, as Liam asks his brother how he could possibly have missed. "Who says I missed?" says Paul, and tells him it's the best way to raise staff morale. "What's a few quid for a meal?" he asks him, and then says, "Anyway, it was worth it, just to see the look on Baldwin's face!" And it was classic.
Jason and Sarah come back from their film, which wasn't very good. Jason says that next time he'll pick the film. "Who says there'll be a next time?" asks Sarah and warns him not to take her for granted. Jason walks her home and gives him a quick kiss goodnight and goes inside.
Les is outside the chip shop, waiting for Cilla to finish, looking worried. Yana is locking up the shop when Les pushes his way in. "Where's Cilla!" he demands to know, saying he's been watching the place for half an hour and not seen hide nor hair of her. Yana starts to explain that she's out the back cleaning down the preparation area, when Cilla comes in from the back. She is furious and pushes him out, locking the door behind him and telling him that she and Yana are off out. "I shouldn't wait up!" she snaps. (Side note: Yana’s hair reminds me of Bubble on Ab Fab)
Danny looking quite dapper, arrives home with some take-out. "Frankie!" he calls, getting plates out of the cupboard. He walks into the bedroom where he stops short. There are Frankie and Jamie in bed, looking guilty. Bewildered, he turns and walks out again. They follow him out, wrapping clothes around themselves. "We were going to tell you," Jamie starts to say. "Well go on then," says Danny, "Tell me what that was, 'cos it ain't what it looked like, it can't possibly be, can it?" There's a pause. "Tell us!" he screams. Jamie mutters, "We love each other…." "No!" Danny shouts, "you don't tell me that, you don't ever tell me that, boy, or I swear I'll kill you!" He tells him to get out, but when he goes to take Frankie with him, Danny lunges forward, as if to hit him. Frankie leaps between them, "Don't touch him, please!" she cries. "That's funny, innit," says Danny, quietly, "you sounded just like his mum then." He tells them to get out of his sight, and then stands looking totally stunned.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Jamie and Frankie are about to tell Danny their dirty, dirty secret when their plan is scuttled by the surprise appearance of Warren, who'th jutht arrived from thunny Thpain!
Warren may be coming back to England to play for a new team (I think) but this visit is just a few days. He tells Frankie he's been dreaming about her "roathties" all week. He also teases Jamie about his delivery van driver job (hey, don't knock it. It apparently comes with a free van 24/7, courtesy of Penny King). Danny says he's booked a restaurant instead, seeing as this is a surprise visit.
Now, folks. I don't think I need to remind you that the last time the Baldwins all got together for a family dinner in a restaurant, it was Christmas, 2005. Mike forgot that his brother died and Carol got loaded and came over and ruined everyone's Christmas. She also planted the seed that there may be something between Jamie and Frankie way back then so while I dislike this storyline, you can't say it hasn't been marinating for some time.
Anyway, they get to the restaurant and Jamie pushes Frankie to use that as a venue for their big news, but Frankie resists, saying it will humiliate him. Well, if he can't humiliate him, he can at least pitch a small fit once everyone's seated and ready to order.
"I can't spend three hours making small talk," Jamie says.
"Small talk?" Frankie asks. "It's your brother. We want to know how you've been."
Jamie tries to push the issue but is cut off by Frankie, who tells him to shut it.
"So you're my mother now are you?" Jamie asks.
"Jay, son, please?" Danny asks, confused as to what he and Frankie are fighting about.
"Oh spare me the doting dad routine, it's turning my stomach!" Jamie cries.
"All right, point taken," Danny says. "I might be overdoing the Baldwin United stuff but I can't help it. Frankie don't deserve this though. She's done nothing for you but good. Now, come on, please, make up."
Jamie says he hates phonies and hates being phony and says he's got stuff he needs to say. Danny says he'll get his chance but asks that they have their dinner first.
Poor Warren. All he wanted was a "roathtie" but now he's stuck in a restaurant, listening to his family fight while he waits for his theafood thalad, followed by a nithe tiramathu.
When they get back to the apartment, Danny breaks out the brandy but Jamie storms out, followed by Frankie. She begins to make it clear to him that she's chosing her family over an affair with her stepson. An angry and all intense Jamie breaks up with mum right then and there.
Steve comes by the café and rescues some shepherd's pie that Vera was about toss out. He goes to pay an insistent Becky, but as they were cashing out and it was going to waste anyway, Vera gives it to him gratis. Becky sneaks a fiver out of the cash register.
Hayley arrives back from the Cash n' Carry (it's like Costco) with a cab load of supplies. Vera tells her the cash is a bit short tonight and suspects Becky.
It doesn't help her case when she later arrives at the Rovers and buys a round for Hayley.
Of course, the moral of the story is that all former prisoners are not to be trusted, ever. So screw you, John Howard Society!
What's up with Cilla?
Les comes by with a package holiday brochure to cheer up his wife but Cilla is on the couch, depressed.
Later, Chesney, who suddenly has custody of his dog again, tells Les that he thinks Cilla is having an affair and gives good evidence of such (the phone calls, the odd behaviour). He tells Les he wants his old mum back.
Later in the Rovers, Les has a few more cross words with Becky and says all he wanted a smile from someone, somewhere but can't even manage that these days. I kind of feel bad for the guy.
In Other News
The factory girls are debating the merits of an office Christmas do vs. a rented hall. Kelly thinks the office is cheap as chips but Joanne counters that the alternative is listening to the likes of Vernon singing cover tunes. Then, someone, they rope Liam into deciding it. It has something to do with darts. I think the winner decides the venue and the budget.
Clurr and Ashley asks Hayley if she would ask Roy to be Freddy, I say Freddy's, godfather. She is chuffed at the news until they, rather gauchely I might add, ask Eileen, who is sitting right there beside Hayley, if she would be godmother. Eileen, because she is a decent person, tries to convince them that she'd make a crappy godmother just to see if they'll get the hint that they just hurt Hayley's feelings.
Meanwhile, even Les notices their social faux-pas and says they missed a trick there. But then he goes and says to Steve Hayley would be the "Hairy Godmother" and they'd could get both godparents for the price of one. This earns a reprimand from Hayley loyalist Becky. And then I don't feel so bad for Les anymore.
I got the heads up that there will be a change to the Corrie Schedule:
Corrie will be pre-empted for the traditional Labour Day football game on Monday,
CBC will air a double-episode (7:00 - 8:00 pm) on Tuesday the 4th.
And for our American readers, I can confirm that it will be the Roughriders vs. the Roughriders.
(For the Canadian readers, yes, I know...one of those teams no longer exists.)
They got to send Frankie away....soon. At this point I think she's going to drop down in the middle of Roy's and start giving birth with Becky running around screaming, 'I don't know nothing about birthin' babies, Miss Haley!'
The show opens with Danny trying to not burn water, while Frankie complains about all the noise going on. Jamie calls her to find out why she spent the night with Danny and to yell at her to for not telling him about their cheap, disgusting, nauseating ‘love’ affair.
Danny meanwhile, smiles and drinks orange juice, oblivious to it all.
I’d like to take the opportunity to say that I don’t think Danny (or really many people) in their wildest dreams would think that their son would be schtumping the step mom….hot though Frankie may be and as cheating as Danny may be.
Later, Jamie wants to talk about the situation at the Rovers, which seems pretty risky if you ask me. Luckily, Eileen joins them at the table and announces that if she had to choose between Samuel L Jackson and Smokey Crisps, she’d have to say ‘Sorry Mr. Jackson.’
Glacia pauses at that moment to wonder what wound happen if she had to choose between Vodka and Paul Michael Glaser. She realizes that it’s an insanely mad decision and just happy that she lives in a world where she’d never have to decide between the two.
Later Jamie and Frankie decide to tell Danny the truth together and like Tony Soprano putting out a hit, they decided when would be the ‘right’ time to tell him. Jamie checks with Frankie and asks if she is ready to face the financial consequences and she says yes that she came from a poor background and is ready to go back to it.
Glacia calls, ‘Bullshit’. Frankie is a lovely woman, etc. but having said that….I know a material girl when I see one. Big difference between working at Roy’s part time for giggles and shits and having to depend on that as your income. Sorry, I don’t buy it. I think most of us would struggle giving up the lifestyles we’ve become accustomed to and I really doubt Frankie is going to be lovin’ life so much when it’s her and Jamine in a bachelor apartment with a futon and a WII system.
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas
The girls are asked to work through lunch at the factory which none of them agree to unless they have lunch bought for them. Liam says fine and gives over money for sandwiches. Kelly’s going to get them but says she won’t go to the Café for them. Haley says everyone should give Becky a chance (Personally, I’m siding with Kelly on this one.) and a discussion unfolds until Liam tells them got go get the sandwiches now or they go without.
Meanwhile, they girls want a bit more money for this years Christmas party. Their starting asking price is $1,000 and Danny’s is $250. In the end they get 250 plus are allowed to knock off early. (Which confused me because I thought they needed to work overtime.)
Does the Carpet Match the Curtains
Janice starts hounding in on Sally about being a natural blond…not. Words are exchanged and finally Sally pulls out a picture of herself and sister Gina in 1974 as proof of her blondness.
Oh come on Sally, love, I had your back until you pulled out that photo. A) You don’t need to defend your hair colour to anyone. B) We were ALL blond in 1974…those days are gone.
Something’s Up in the State of Cillamark
Cilla’s made breakfast for Chesney! A few hours after he’s left for school. Oh well…she tried. Puzzled by her strange behaviour, Les worries that she may be going through ‘The Change’.
So he consults Eileen who screeches like a banshee when she realizes that he believes her to be post-menopausal. (A quick check reveals that Eileen is 45. No word on how old Cilla is, but she had Fizz in 1985 and Billy presumably a short time before that…I’d put her at the same age. Even though Wendi Peters is only 39 herself.)
Later, Chesney comes home to find her making plans on the phone to go somewhere with an overnight case. He asks her about it, but she quickly changes the subject.
Life With Charlie
Tracey goes around to the Peacocks and offers up some of Amy’s toys for Freddie which Claire gladly accepts. Later, when Tracey delivers the toys, Claire asks if Tracey might not want to keep them in case Tracey and Charlie ever decided to have a baby. Tracey kind of laughs and says there’s just no way they’re having a baby.
Claire looks shocked and even more shocked when Tracey says Charlie isn’t a fan of sleepless nights, etc. (sigh…because people who chose not to have children are just plain evil.) Tracey takes the opportunity to play this up about how she’s just going to have to life with that cruel reality and not produce the spawn of Satan.
Then she asks Claire to go with her for a drink in the Rovers, after, of course, checking in with Charlie and getting permission first.
Oh and in the Rovers, Liz gives Tracey an expensive outfit for Amy. I was in the kitchen at that point so didn’t actually see the outfit, but I’m sure it was low cut with black and white strips – and matching zigzag necklace.
In Other News
Becky is annoying at the café and the other workers hate her. Haley, who I think must be HIGH, doesn’t seem concern and keeps walking around with a big goofy grin on her face.