Swims with Dolphins
Cilla finds Les on the chesterfield, where he spent the night. He claims he was too depressed to climb the stairs. Noticing the empties scattered about, Cilla asks "They sell depression in cans these days?"
"How am I going to get through this?" he asks.
"By getting drunk while I carry on dying from the looks of it," she replies.
Les says that it's not fair that he should have carry on without her, whereas she has it easy: she'll be gone. He declares that he intends to drink and smoke his way into oblivion. (I think I'm going to put that on my dream banner.)
Later, Les goes into the cornershop for his fags and Dev asks if this is the breakfast of champions. Les blurts out that Cilla is dying and it's the only way he can cope. Dev apologises for as Eileen comes and also learns the news that Cilla is dying as well (well, not dying but pretending to be dying as a way of getting revenge for Les' fling with Yana, but they don't know that).
Les comes home and cracks open his beer. Cilla thinks it's typical that he's made her cancer all about him. Les admits that he's taken advantage of her but whatever Cilla wants, she'll get.
Cilla says she may be naive and a bit foolish, but she has always wanted to swim with dolphins. In Florida. She is, after all, dying. And that involves an expensive and ethically questionable tourism activity, then so be it.
Les says he'll sort it. He may have to borrow the money but he'll do it.
He shows up slightly drunk at Streetcars and demands to be given jobs, like the one Steve is about to go out on, so he can pay for Cilla's dream. Steve says he's not letting him drive with alcohol on his breath. Les moans that he's already losing a whole days wages. Eileen points out that a good way to save money is to give up fags and booze. Les takes that heart and heads home.
He drops 65 quid in a big jar he's labelled "Cilla's Dolphin Fund." Cilla doesn't think it'll be enough as she's fading fast. Les assures her it's just the beginning and then dashes off to make his own dinner.
If Frankie and Jamie Get Married and She was Viv's Daughter-in-Law, What Does That Make Frankie?
Oh yeah, this story. Frankie goes off to face the world, with Jamie's encouragement. He reckons if people see them going about their business as though they have nothing to be ashamed of, people will eventually leave them alone. Who knows, he says, it might catch on. Perhaps he is right. After all, Tracy technically isn't Ken's daughter. I wouldn't see the harm there, would you?
Frankie is in the café when (not shown on CBC) Janice comes in for a bit of slagging off of Frankie before she is asked to leave by Roy. Later, Bev tells Frankie, that what she does to in the privacy of her own home is her own business, and that she should never mind what they're all saying.
"What are they all saying?" Frankie asks.
Bev tells her to ignore but Steve, having brunch with Bill Webster, adds that they're not saying anything.
"I'd sooner wait until you did something wrong, and only then if it had something to do with me," Bill Webster adds.
Then Viv, Danny's mum shows up with an overnight bag. She has come to look for her son. You know, Danny? Disappeared a few weeks ago? No note. No letter. Yeah, she's concerned for some reason.
Later, Jamie comes round to Frankie's where, he, Frankie and Viv discuss what's going on. Viv says she doesn't think work could be so bad that he'd just disappear and asks Frankie if he and she were rowing.
"No more than usual," she replies as Jamie looks pissed.
Viv asks about Leanne Battersby but Frankie says she's long gone. Jamie adds that they've moved on since then. You can tell he's itching to tell his gran that he's shacked up with her missing son's ex-wife. God, who are these people and what have they done with the real Frankie and Jamie?
Finally, Viv insists that they go down to the police station and file a missing persons report. Jamie is sure that he's having them on but it's off to the police station anyway.
When they get there, they answer some questions about what Danny was doing the last time they saw him. Then Frankie provides a description of Danny's appearance and that prompts a visit from a Detective Inspector. He tells them a body that matches the description given by Frankie has been pulled from the river. They would like them to identify if it is indeed Danny.
Everyone looks shocked and and filled with dread over what may have come to pass. Well, everyone except Jamie who is considering waiting until they get into the morgue to tell Viv that he's dating Frankie.
Let's Go Siesta/In Your Ford Fiesta
A tow-truck delivers Gail's early Christmas present to David: an old Ford Fiesta (a Mark II, from the looks of it). David looks happier than he's ever been. Kevin promises the advice to fix it up will be free but Dave'll have to do the labour himself.
In Other News
Bill called Maureen to tell her he couldn't get a flight back home to Germany, what with it being Christmas and all. Meanwhile, his fancywoman Audrey says she doesn't want to know about any lies he's telling.
Vernon tells Liz that a Christmas gig on Friday could reunite
Reluctantly, Liz agrees to let Michelle have the night off but when Vern asks Michelle, she says she has a dinner date with Steve. Vern says, hey, this is Rock n' Roll. Pink Floyd didn't chuck their reunion because they felt like getting a curry. Michelle strokes her shiny, shiny black hair and says she'll think about it.