Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Sexy Party Update
It Maybe Over Soon Kittens
I take back everything I said about no one packing on Corrie (save Keef). The show opens with Jamie packing a suitcase to go to Spain. (Still….where are the boxes to pack the contents). Frankie is giving him a bit of shit about the Vern situation so Jamie goes over to make amends.
Over at the Rovers, Vern refers to Jamie as ‘Oedipus’ and when he tells Vern that he’s sorry, Vern looks at him and says, ‘I’m normal.’ Not having had great success with this apology, Jamie storms out of the pub, but not before Paul sees him to wish Jamie and ‘his missus” (sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo creepy) all the best. Jamie does a bit of ‘yeah, whatever.’.
When he returns to the flat there’s no Frankie to be seen, but Sean drops buy to give a present (a dress shirt) to his ‘bezzie straight friend’. They have a little chin wag and Sean says that every time he looks at a Enrique Inglesias poster he will cry.
Frankie has a talk with Liz and confesses that she just doesn’t feel right with Jamie and he’s turning into his dad. She then goes back to the house and tells Jamie that she just can’t go through with it. He cries that they are not related and what they are doing is not incest. ‘Then why does it feel like it is?’ replies Frankie. (uuuuuh, cause you raised him as your own son?)
Jamie says that once they go to Spain, there won’t be any accusing eyes. Frankie asks if there will be no mirrors in Spain because she can’t look at herself in one anymore. She tells Jamie that she’s going to stay with a mate in Essex.
I know which Essex mate too.
So amongst a lot of tears Frankie gets into a cab and drives off into the sunset. Jamie is left standing on the street just as Sean arrives. Sean puts his arm around Jamie and they go back into the house to ring in 2007.
Now….I’ll save the really best part for the end of the update.
Modern Ethics and the Manchester Man
Less is moaning about how he’s going to have to pay back all the money that Cilla scammed off of everyone for the dolphin trip. Chesney tells him that really he only has himself to blame because when he slept with Yana he forced Cilla to do this.
Less replies that all the times that Cilla cheated on him, he never pretended that he was dying. And besides, Chesney’s a bit to blame too because he never told Cilla about Less and Yana. And, and, and what kind of person tells their mom they wish they were dead.
Oh dear, it’s gonna take a team of Rabbis and Dr. Phil to figure out who’s right here.
Less talks to Steve about the big Cilla scam and explains that he was scammed just as much as anyone else. Steve tells him that if he’s willing to work New Years for free, then he’ll fix it with the other drivers who gave up wages for Cilla. Less agrees and asks who is on dispatch tonight. Steve replies, ‘Fat Brenda from Ladycabs in Levenshulme.
OMG – is there actually a character called ‘Fat Brenda’?! I NEED to see Fat Brenda. I NEED to see Ladycabs – are they a line of pink cabs? It’s too fabulous. In fact, if the writers ever want to write her into the show, I will be on the first plane to go audition for the role. Glacia really, really wants to be Fat Brenda from Ladycabs.
You Bad, Bad Lad.
Over at the Rovers, Liz has decided that the evening will be fancy dress for all the staff, with the theme of Stars of the Silver Screen.
There is much guessing about who Liz will come dressed as and Michelle suggests, ‘Lassie’. Glacia giggles. When we do see the costumes, Violet is looking fetching as Marylin Monroe in the Seven Year Itch, Michelle is Kirsten Dunst in ‘Bring it On’ (The costume itself was cute, but as she looked nothing like K.D. I thought the idea was lame.). Sean walks in wearing a wee cowboy outfit and Violet asks, ‘Carry on Cowboy?’ - Sean finds this droll and responds, ‘Brokeback Mountain’. (Mr. Glacia laughs with gusto at that.).
Liz shows up in vest and bowler hat and although Glacia immediately recognizes the costume from the greatestmovieevermade, Michelle says how she LOVES Stan Laural. ‘It’s Sally Bowles.’ Responds Liz.
Steve comes down the stairs (sans costume) and Michelle asks, ‘Shrek?’ Michelle is GOLD tonight with the digs.
Steve tells Violet as an aside that he has a champagne and goodies in the back room for Michelle and to make sure Violet gets Michelle into the backroom at midnight. Violet responds with my favorite line of the show, ‘You bad, bad lad. What are you like?’
At the stroke of midnight, Steve is alone in the back and he ventures out to the front only to find that Sonny is kissing Michelle. Sonny tells Michelle that if he had a choice between a party and her, he’d always choose her. (See Steve, THIS is why Sonny is going to win her heart.)
So Steve takes his two glasses of champagne and walks past the crazy congo line that’s going down the street and shares it with Eileen who is tending Holly.
Meanwhile, Vern stumbles into the back and sees the spread laid out. As he begins to help himself, Liz walks in and says, ‘Oh Vern! For me?’ He responds, ‘Happy New Year, Tiger.’
Yeah, there’s not enough ass whooping of Vern on the show.
Tracey spots a young man who she finds attractive (and so does Glacia!) at the Rovers and says to Charlie that he should be her payback for when Charlie cheated on her. She flirts with him and tells Charlie and Jason how he probably will think that Tracey is their fag hag.
She announces to Mr.Cute Guy that Jason and Charlie are celebrating getting married. Jason puts his arm around Charlie to prove the point until Charlie threatens him with grievous bodily harm. Later, outside the pub she is seen flirting with Cute Guy and a few others until Charlie hauls her ass home.
In Other News
Vera wants the old Jack back and tries to provoke him into snapping out of the good guy thing. Finally they let the cat out of the bag that Molly has been ‘training’ Jack. Tyrone hopes that she hasn’t been doing that to him. She says no, then gives him a bit to eat and gives him a pat.
Fizz says after the day she’s had, the world is lucky she’s not on meth.
Liz has a tattoo!
The Sit Your Ass Down and Get Ready For This Part
So Sean and Jamie are commiserating at the house when the clock strike 12. At that moment Jamie’s cell rings and he says he doesn’t want to talk to Frankie. Sean throws him the cell and says he should talk to her.
Jamie says ‘Hello’.
And on the other end freaking DANNY says, ‘Hello Son. Just calling to wish you happy new years and sorry to hear about you and Frankie.’
Jamie freaks out and starts asking how he knows.
Danny replies by telling him not to worry about the factory, that’s been sorted out. Oh also, he’s sold the flat and contents (another packing issue resolved) so if he could be a good lad an slip the key in the mail slot.
Jamie keeps asking how he knows and then finally says that he hopes Danny and Frankie will be happy together…they deserve each other. He gets off the phone and tells Sean that Danny has been manipulating the whole thing from the get go.
Meanwhile, here’s Danny.*
He’s not with Frankie, but rather at a sexy party with a bevy of beautiful broads. Grinning from ear to ear.
I love how Corrie does characters, especially complex ones like Danny. I cheered when he got screwed over for the factory by Adam…but this time, this time I’m totally cheering for Danny. You go you cockney star you!
I said sexy party.
*As Glacia will be in Cuba in 2008