Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Question of the Week


Alright loves, here is the question of the week (okay of the last 6 months...because we haven't had one in a long time.)

Which Corrie characters have been Martinized?

Think back and try to remember which Corrie characters have started out as fairly normal nice people but who were later turned into big creepy freaks.

My nominations:

Martin certainly.

Don Brennan also.

Now, I was going to add Sally, but I don't they've turned her into a creep as much as they've turned her into a bitch.

Who do you think?

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Have Drink, Must Write Update

Okay lovelies, got a bottle of Riesling, so I am set to write the Corrie Update of the week.

I'd Like This Character Back By Friday .....
Martin announces that he has a surprise for the family...and to make a long story short the surprise is that he has taken over the job duties of his friend who is laid up in the hospital. Those duties? He gets to flap around the street in a gigantic chicken outfit as 'Bernard - The Weatherfield County Mascot'.

The kids, as I, are absolutely mortified.

Oh Martin, Martin, Martin.....It would seem that the writers for Corrie HATE you. I mean, seriously, hate you and like a gang of school yard bullies they will torment you to the ends of Weatherfield.

We've seen this before, you know. Remember Don Brennan? Started off as cheerful 2nd husband to Ivy? The sane to Ivy's crazy? But how did he end up? A very, very annoying maniac. If fact, did I hear correctly on Classic Corrie today when he ponders how he will charge Ashley (his then lodger) for the energy he consumes boiling a pot of tea?

I think it's only proper to put a name to this virus that destroys so many Corrie characters. Next time we see a previously normal likeable character be turned into some kind of freak, we can just take a sip of tea and say, 'Tsk, tsk. Oh dear, looks like he got Martinized.'

Red Rum, Red Rum....er Red Rec, Red Rec
Claire seems to be s.o.l. with volunteers to clean up the play area at Red Rec. Everyone except Emily and Ashley have refused to give a helping hand. That is until the gardener (aka Andrew) shows up at the pub and the gaggle of factory workers all decide that it might just be worth their while anyway.

Come the day of the clean up, it begins to look like only Claire, Emily, Sophie, Chesney, David and Ashley have turned up. Even Andrew is AWOL. But after a bit, the girls (Janice, Fizz, Twins, etc) all show up in their finery to flirt - er - work for Andrew.

When it's discovered that Andy is not there, Janice starts a mutiny and refuses to work, less her hair gets messed up. She gets quite nasty with Claire, who, as we've seen before can throw it right back and a mud fight ensue. Emily reads the riot act and everyone starts to get to work.

At that point, the not-so-constant gardener shows up and we find out why he was missing. Turns out Randy Andy spent the night with Sean. Ooooooooo, cheeky monkey.

In the end the Red Wreck is back to Red Rec and everyone has a cheery pint at the Rovers afters. (BTW - Sean was looking good a little messed up at the pub.)

Norris Cole on Aging
Kevin has his big 4-0 this week and when Norris catches wind he says, 'I dreaded turning 40. I thought it was the beginning of the end. And I was right.'

Glacia, aged 39 and 8/12ths, drops her tea at this point to free both hands in order to flip Norris the entire flock.

Tyrone, event planner extraordinaire, has managed to reserve a table at the Rovers and make sure all the A-list pensioners attend Kevin's big do. Nathan is more than pissed, but the lads settle in for a night of drinking and, well, drinking.

Sally surprises Kevin with a set of cufflinks that will come in handy during his weekly meetings with Prince Phillip. In addition, she gives him a kiss and then goes home.

Seriously, Kevin...HAVE an affair.

Carrie On Rosie
The birthday festivities are such that Nathan ends up staying on the Webster's couch and the next morning Rosie goes into the living room to find, 'Whoops! Oh, I'm sorry... I didn't know you were changing!'

Because he didn't make it home that night, his girlfriend and landlord, Farah, shows up on the street to tell Nathan that they are through and that she is kicking his sorry cheatin' ass out the door.

Kevin lets Nathan couch surf at their place for a few days which offer up many more opportunities for Rosie to, 'Whoops! Oh dear! Sorry, I just needed to get my....wait...is that a tattoo of the Wreck of the Hesperus on your .....'

Yes, Rosie has fallen head over heels in crush with Nathan and spends a great deal of time looking doe-eyed at Weatherfield's pinup boy. This, of course, comes all crashing down upon her when she sees him give Tracey a big smooch on the street.

She's heartbroken and Sal has to jump in and do this weird thing called 'parenting'. She lets Rosie know that it's perfectly normal to have a crush and that even if Nathan is going out with Tracey, Craig is awfully sweet on Rosie.

Sorry Loves -

The glamourous life of a techincal writer has once again made unreasonable demands on my time.

Will try to get an update out tonight...

National Tea Break

In an effort to raise awareness, and some cash, for epilepsy, Epilepsy Action has asked several famous British folk abot why they love tea, including Julie Hesmondhalgh (our Hayley):

"I love tea and drink it by the gallon-full! On a normal day I'll probably have about 7 cups before lunchtime – I'm quite famous in my village for always having a brew in my hand even when I'm walking my little girl to pre-school!"
Our Hayley also offers up the recipe for her mum's chocolate cake. Full recipe and her "mug shot" available here.

Monday, May 29, 2006

Extra! Extra! Latest Schedule Update














According to the scrawl during this weekend's omnibus, Corrie will be returning to weeknight viewings on June 19, after the Oilers win the Stanley Cup. Or June 20, if it goes to 7 games. When it returns, the show will air at 7:00pm, with double episodes for the first week. The CBC page has been updated accordingly.

Hey, CBC, how about double episodes all summer long?

New Corrie Site

I got this from Susan in the UK....a Corrie related bulletin board where peeps from all over the world come to discuss the goings on in Weatherfield.

Weatherfield Web

Check it out, eh.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Documenting Sam



A fanblog created by our Chelly, Documenting Sam seeks to chronicle the career of Sam Robertson, the Scottish actor/model celebrated for his role as our "Adam Barlow" on Coronation Street.

Note: Contains some spoilers.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Weekend Update - the rest

Go Speed Racer!


Ken decides to give Adam 500 pounds in honour of his road test. Candice has herself wrapped around Adam as he announces to Ken that he's going to go buy a car with the money. Ken offers to go with him, but Adam says, 'Oh I can do it myself, plus the worst I can do is lose 500.'

He picks out a sexy little number but on their way back to Corrie street, Adam and Candice find themselves stranded in the middle of the road in a broken auto. Candice calls him a loser for buying a piece of junk and storms off just as the police officer who wants him to move the car informs him that he put petrol in a diesel engine (or is it diesel in a petrol engine.)

The car is toast and would cost more to repair than what he paid for it. Adam sheepishly tells Ken and Mike what happened and just as Ken is about to say, 'Well, I hope you learned your lesson.', Mike jumps in with, 'No matter, I'll buy you a bigger and sexier car.'

So now Adam is sporting a sexy new race car and guess who is back on his arm. Candice, so wonderfully transparent.

Big Mama's House


Frankie and Danny have trotted off to Spain to visit Warren, leaving the house to Jamie. He immediately calls Leanne so they can play house.

This soon becomes an intergenerational house as Jamie's mom shows up on their doorstep for a surprise visit. After, making herself at home and annoying, she lets them know the real reason for her surprise visit. She's been evicted.

SURPRISE!

Waldon's Pond

Claire finds out that the children's park down at the Red Rec is a mess with trash and hypodermic needle and a few frustrated efforts to clean it up have fallen through.

She talked to the gent who's currently working on it and he explains that they have the funding for material, but not for labour.

Claire goes on a crusade to get volunteers but everyone has some lame ass excuse. (Sorry, I just thought there should be more community participation.) Her saint arrives in the form of Emily who promises to get a bunch of people together.

Ashley wants Claire to be careful as Emily is a known tree hugger.

And In Other News


- The homeless lady who taunted Kelly was an old cell mate of hers from jail. yes, Kelly admitted that she had a foolish youth that included incarceration.

- Bev and Deidre go to some African Lion Safari with Amy. Deidre insists on keeping the window rolled down the whole time and at some point a monkey swipes her glasses. LUCKILY, she still had pair of her Nana Mouskouri glasses from 1981 still at home - so she can just wear those for the time being. Cause she doesn't look stupid at all.

- Steve is back from Spain and is pissed that Dev sold the shop to Lister without telling him.

- Phil accepts Gayle's apology and offer for dinner.

- Keith takes Audrey out fishing.

- One of the twins is sporting a lovely new 'pig' brooch.

- The factory girls got shut out for a morning because Danny was away and Mike was golfing. Penny is pissed about the mix up.

- Kev's 40th is coming up and Tyrone is planning a party.

These Are The People in Your Neighbourhood

At the request of Jacqueline, and spurred by recent comments, I decided to research just who lives in and owns what property on Coronation Street.

It's interesting to note that some residences, like Ken Barlow's, date back to the beginning of the show (and have a history prior to that) while others began their existance only after the construction of the large exterior set in the 1990's, like Gail Platt's.

I'm always amazed at how the writers have maintained this continuity. Most of this info comes from Corrie.net

First off, Coronation Street was constructed in 1902, along with the Rovers Return. The pub was built by the Newton and Ridley Brewery and was named after Lt. Philip Newton who had just returned from the Boer War. Originally, it was called the Rover's Return but Newton had the apostrophe dropped so that it would honour all war veterans, and not just him.

Number 1 Coronation St: Currently owned by Ken Barlow and occupied by Ken, Deirdre, Tracey, and Amy Barlow, along with Deirdre's mother, Blanche Hunt. Ken has lived there as a teenager, on and off as an adult, and now is there as a grandfather.

Number 3 Coronation Street: Owned and occupied by Emily Bishop. Norris Cole is her lodger.

Number 5 Coronation Street: Owned by Weatherfield Council. Occupied by Les, Cilla, and Chesney Battersby-Brown. Kirk Sutherland has recently moved to his parents' place to run the kennels.

Number 7 Coronation Street: Owned by Blanche Hunt Mystery Buyer, to whom Blanche sold it to pay for her Polish hip.* Occupied by Danny, Frankie, and Jamie Baldwin. Previously owned by Curly and Emma Watts, who moved to Newcastle. (*Thanks, Lori)

Number 9 Coronation Street: aka The Rectory. Owned by Jack and Vera Duckworth. Occupied by Jack, Vera, and Tyronne Dobbs, their lodger. On Corrie Classics, the Duckworths are at Number 6, across the street, and the Number 9 is currently occupied by Judy and Gary Mallett.

Number 11 Coronation Street: Currently owned by ???. Was owned by Steve Macdonald and occupied by Eileen Grimshaw and her sons Jason and Todd. Steve sold the house to an unknown buyer in order to finance Karen's Wedding of the Century. The buyer kept the house as a rental property and is currently occupied by Eileen, Jason, his girlfried Violet, and Sean Tully, Eileen's lodger and confidant.

Number 15 Coronation Street: The Corner Shop. Currently owned by Dev Alahan. The shop has been on the street since the First World War. Dev bought the shop, along with six others, from his uncle, Ravi Desai.

There is a house number 13, but nobody is listed as living there. Bad luck maybe?

And now, on to the other side, or the "posh side," as Vera calls it:

Number 2: The Salon. Owned by Audrey Roberts.

Number 2A: Flat above the Salon. Owned by Audrey Roberts, rented by Maria and Candice (I think, a number of the teens have moved in and out so I think they're the current occupants).

Number 4: Owned by Fred Elliot. Occupied by Fred Elliot, Ashley, Claire and Joshua Peacock. Was the site of Maxine Peacock's murder at the hands of Richard Hillman.

Number 6: Was owned by the Harris'. However, Tommy is dead at the hands of Katy and Angela is doing her porridge for obstruction of justice. I assume when he died, the house became exclusively Angela's. I'm not sure how the legalities of that sort of thing would work. She obviously can't make mortgage payments from jail. On the other hand, they moved to the street as part of the witness protection programme so maybe the court bought it in the Harris' name? Anyway, current occupants are Keith Appleyard (Angela's father) and Craig Harris.

On Classic Corrie, the house is occupied by Des Barnes.

Number 8: Owned by Gail Platt. Occupied by Gail, Sarah-Lou, David, and Bethany Platt, as well as Sarah-Lou's boyfriend, Scooter. Gail's ex, Martin lives in the flat above D&S Hardware.

Number 10: The Kabin. Owned and operated by Rita Sullivan. Norris Cole is (currently) employed as a shop assistant. 10A is the flat in the back where Rita lives, for now.

Number 12: Owned by Alec Gilroy. Occupied by Steve MacDonald and until last year, his ex-wife Karen.

Number 16: Websters Auto Centre. Owned by Kevin Webster. Was formerly owned by Mike Baldwin as MVB Motors. The business folded and Kevin and his co-worker Tony Horrocks bought it from the bank. Tony left Weatherfield and left his share of the garage to his mother. Later, it was discovered Tony was murdered by Jez Quigley. I'm not sure if Kevin now owns the garage outright or if Nathalie Horrocks still maintains a co-ownership. Current employees are Tyrone Dobbs and Nathan Harding.

And at the end of the street lays Underworld, owned and operated by Mike Baldwin.

Feel free to fill in any gaps I may have missed.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

BBC Radio

I'm listening now (3:26 pm EST) 'Dark Oasis' on BBC7 radio - and Geoff Hinself (Don Brennan from Corrie past) is one of the actors - I think his character is Jack Entwistle. They play part 4 tommorow.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/d/

Weekend Update Part 1


Charlie Says 'No'

Stepford Shel is really making progress with Dr. Finchy and we can see her self confidence coming back and she even ventures downstairs to pull a few pints.

She is, however, a little defensive when anyone congratulates her on 'coming down the stairs'. Sean does his best Liza imprerssionation and hugs Shel in a great big, 'you go girl' fest. Shel looks like she might hurl.

Dr. Finchy suggests that Shel call up her mom to kiss and make up. Shel thinks this is a brill idea until she brings it up with Charlie.

Charlie says, 'No.'.

Cilla says, 'No'.
Cilla and Yana spell it out for our man Les, no ring, no bride. To prove she's serious about getting an engagment ring, she does nothing for Les's 50th birthday. (Never mind mate, the Corrie Canucks wish you many happy returns.).

Policeman says, 'No'.
Les decides to go to the cop shop and tell them that he has 'lost' the engagement ring he bought for his betrothed and could he just have a look at the ones in their lost and found to see if his ring is there.

As they are letting Les peruse the bijoux, the cop in charge has an underling run a check on Mr. Battersby. Sure enough, there's a list of run-ins as long as one Roy's pedantic speeches. The copper knows that Les is up to no good and tells him to take a hike.

Barlows say, 'No'.
Les spys Adam and Mike in front of a pricey automobile, and just in case their privilaged lifestyle escapes Les, Ken says, 'There is a lucky young man, he has had 2 sports cars.'

So in one of the most painful, wincing moments I've ever seen on Corrie, Les asks the young Mr. Barlow for a loan and adds, 'It's my birthday.'

Ow! Did he just say, 'It's my birthday.'?

In the grand style of the British upper set, the Barlows laugh in his face and go motoring off to hunt peasants...I mean phesants.

Cilla says, 'Yes'.
Somehow Les manages to come up with the money to buy a ring for Lady Cilla and shows it off to Yana at the Rovers. Yana tries to get everyone to be quiet so that the entire community can witness the beautiful proposal.

Cilla comes out of the can and at that moment Les gets down on bended need to ask for Cillas newly washed hand in marriage. She agrees and Les is so excited that turns into Mickey Rorke and says he wants a round of drinks, 'for all my friends!'.

Headmaster says, 'No.'
Sophie goes skipping off to her first day at Weatherfield high along with our Chesney. She's is turned away at the gates as 'somebody' forgot to register her there because 'somebody' thought that Sophie would be going to Awk-hill.

Sally has to go to Weatherfield High to talk to the headmaster about squeezing Sophie into the school. Turns out that the new Headmaster is the same teacher that Sally spook to a few months earlier (Something about Weatherfield being a school for losers and nerds and that her girls were 'winners' and too good for this weak-ass school, biotch.)

Turns out the Headmaster *remembered* that conversation and wishes Sally luck on finding Sophie placement at some *other* school.

The Knights Who Say 'Nit'..
Or is it lice? Cause nit and lice are the same thing, right?

Anyway, the House of Webster seems to be producing their fair share of head bugs. Sophie has contracted nits and after being told by Sally that she was to go nowhere, she decided to go outside and play football with Chesney

Almost immeidiately, Chesney gets nits and then Janice gets nits from some wierd head to ball to head transference when she gets hit in the head with the football.

The House of Webster decides to go the primate route and pick through each family members hair killing each nit individually. (Only to discover that Sally has nits too.)

Janice decides to take more drastic measures and shave her head...it really doesn't do anything to 'fem' her up.

Fizz washes Chesneys' head with some proven nit killer tonic. This shampoo works wonders and she passes it on to Janice because apparantly shaving your head does not get rid of the nits (note to self). Then Fizz sends the bottle of shampoo over to the House of Webster.

There is a great row later in the Rovers between Janice and Sally over the nit situation and Janice seems to be triumphing until Sally lets her know that the 'shampoo' was flea and tick shampoo for dogs.

Everyone in the bar laughs cruelly, very cruelly at Janice.

Poor bloody Janice. I mean if I had the choice between having lice and using dog shampoo on my head...I'm taking the dog shampoo everytime. woof-woof.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Update update

Will be doing the updated for Sunday's show tonight....stay tuned to this bat channel.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Gayest Show in the World


Thanks Cara in Michigan who sent us this article from the Mirror site! Nice to hear from the American Corrie Canucks ;-)

13 May 2006
CORRIE IS THE GAYEST SHOW IN THE WORLD
EXCLUSIVE STREET'S CAMP BARMAN

By Claire Donnelly


MOVE over Bet Lynch - there's a new queen of Coronation Street. And Antony Cotton intends to reign supreme for some time to come.

He plays flamboyant gossip Sean Tully, who minces effortlessly between sewing knickers at Underworld and serving pints in the Rovers.

As the soap's first camp gay character, Sean has been a big hit with everyone from children to pensioners - and turned Antony, who is openly-gay in real life, into a pin-up for men and women alike.

"You can't even imagine what the reaction is like once you're in Corrie," says Antony, 30. "It's crazy. I get chatted up by girls and I get my a*** pinched by everyone, men and women. It doesn't bother me one bit.

"In a perverse way, I think there'd be even more interest if Sean was being played by some 25-year-old top telly totty hunk who was straight.

"It would be all, 'What's it like kissing a man when you're not gay?'"

Far from hating all the attention, he is revelling in it. Today, sitting in the sunshine and surveying the Street's famous cobbles, he looks like the cat that got the cream.

"This sounds awful, but I feel blessed at the moment," he confides. "I'm on top of the world, I really am."

And no wonder. This week he's up for a Best Actor gong at the Soap Awards for the second year running. Last year, he narrowly lost out to EastEnders' Shane Richie and it's clear he doesn't want to settle for second best again.

"It isn't the taking part that counts, it's the winning," insists Antony with a twinkle in his blue eyes. "It's amazing to be nominated but, yes, I want to win. It's going to be a great night."

Not only that but his role in Corrie is about to be beefed up by the introduction of Sean's family and stronger storylines.

In the first of these, Sean is thrown into turmoil when he tracks down his dad Brian (played by Auf Wieder-sehen, Pet star Tim Healy).

LIFE-LONG Corrie fan Antony only won the part through sheer luck and an awful lot of cheek.

After finding fame as Alex in the controversial 1999 Channel 4 drama Queer As Folk, he wrote to the Street's producers begging for a part.

His gamble paid off and he joined the show in August 2004. Antony knows he was lucky to come to Corrie when he did.

There had just been a gay storyline involving Todd Grimshaw - who realised he preferred blokes after getting Sarah Platt pregnant. And a character like Sean, who is as camp as Butlins, might not have gone down so well if that hadn't paved the way.
"The timing was right," says Antony. "Corrie couldn't have gone on without a gay character for much longer.

"Let's face it, it's the gayest show in the world, made in the gayest city in the world, so it really was overdue.

"A few years ago having a gay character and introducing a long-term boyfriend might not have worked. People would have thought, 'We don't need to see that'. Now it would work.

"Maybe there will be a big, gay Corrie wedding for Sean at some point. Now that men are getting married to each other and things have changed, who knows?

"Sean isn't always lucky in love but if someone asked him and loved him he could well go for it - so watch this space."

In his campest tones, he adds: "As I always say, Sean's got one foot in Elsie Tanner, one foot in Norris Cole and the world in between. And people like him for that, they want him to be happy.

"I even get letters from grannies asking when is he going to meet someone and get a nice boyfriend."

Growing up in Bury, Lancashire, with his older brother Andrew, now 31, Antony was a born performer.

At five he loved dancing around the house - "I was the real Billy Elliot," he laughs - and he began acting from the age of 10. At school, he won over the other children with his good nature and sense of humour.

"I didn't get bullied any more than anyone else at school," he says. "Maybe because if you're the one telling the jokes you don't get picked on." He was gay in his teens, and was nervous about coming out.

When he eventually plucked up the courage to tell mum Enid and dad Paul, they didn't bat an eyelid.

They just laughed and asked if he wanted a cup of tea.

"As a human being, it's one of those things you always know, then everything else fits into place later on," he explains.

"But my family are brilliant, so supportive of everything I do and they always have been."

Although happy to talk 19 to the dozen about most subjects, Antony remains tightlipped about his private life.

ANTONY, who has a long-term partner, says: "People are obsessed by who you leep with and what sex they are," he says.

"But I'm a firm believer in whatever you do - as long as it doesn't harm anybody - it's nobody else's business.

"If we lived in an ideal world, everybody would be able to sleep with everybody anyway. "Look at the Romans. It was a sign of wealth if you had a wife, a mistress and a houseboy - and they all slept in the same bed!"

Now he is in the public eye, he is keen to break into other areas of entertainment.
"I don't want to leave Corrie," he says, hastily. "But I'd love to do something else alongside it.

"I've got it all planned out - the autobiography, the chatshow - because, in case you haven't noticed, I do like to talk - writing, and a gameshow.

"It would be great to do a gay gameshow. I was born to do it."

Whatever he does, Antony will have the backing of his family and, in particular his mother, who he describes as inspirational. Seeing how despondent he got "between jobs", Enid got herself an agent and showed her son how it should be done.

THE former dressmaker began acting at the age of 54. Seven years on, as Enid unn, she has appeared in Phoenix Nights and Doctors, has just done a latenight episode of Hollyoaks and even been an extra in Corrie.

"I was at the Baftas last week and people kept saying, 'Ooh, I met your mum, isn't she lovely?'" says Antony, proudly. "She's so funny. We speak on the phone about four times a day. She'll be ringing me later to say, 'Is it sunny there?' and she only lives 15 miles away. "When mum started acting it was at one of those times when I was out of work and going through a lull. I don't think she wanted me to give up so, to be motivating, she said she was going to try it. My first reaction was, 'Yeah right'. The next thing I knew she'd got an agent and was off.

Now I can't imagine her stopping. "If there's a nuclear war, it will be my mum and Cilla Black who survive - she takes it all in her stride. "I don't know who I'm taking with me to the Soap Awards yet, but if it's my mum we'll have a good time.
"And I'm all set. I've got a new Paul Smith suit... Saying that, I might not wear the trousers, I might go for a ra-ra skirt or capri pants - that would make a good picture on the red carpet. I wonder what everyone would make of that. "But seriously, I am so chuffed at the way everything's going. I wake up every day just thinking, 'I love my life'. How good is that?"

You can vote for Coronation Steet in the British Soap Awards from noon Monday until 5pm Friday by visiting www.britishsoapawards.tv or itv.com.

claire.donnelly@mirror.co.uk

Saturday, May 20, 2006

24 - Corrie

Vera has just 24 hours to make Kiefer her own.



(Thanks Dale!)

Happy Birthday, Betty Driver


Betty Driver as Mary Matthews in Facing the Music (1941)


Betty Driver (our Betty Williams) turns 86 today.

Click here to see her Corrie Canuck birthday posting from last year.

Corrie Fan Selling Collection



A Canadian Coronation Street fan has decided to sell a collection of books, official magazines, audiotapes and a hand knit Rover's Return Sweater.

The advertisement in UsedVictoria.com expires June 16.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Update, Episode 5: Oh Yes, It's Ladies Night

What Planet Are You On?

Gail comes into Streetcars for a cab. Eileen starts winding her up about Dr. Phil Nail.

Later on, Phil confronts Gail about what she's been telling Donald. After initially thinking she was a nice person, his opinion has changed. He asks what he he ever done to her.

'Nothing' she squeaks. And now he never will, either.

Gail confronts Eileen about the lies she spread (she did no such thing).

'Let's face it Gail,' she says 'Sour little shrews like you just don't turn him on. Now, why don't you run off home? Those net curtains won't twitch by themselves.'

Black Cars Look Better in the Shade

Adam took and, with the help of Candice's grotty teddy bear, passes his driver's test. As a present, Ken gives him 500 quid toward the purchase of an old beater. Mike looked a little perturbed. I'm betting a game of oneupmanship is about to begin with Mike buying Adam a flash car.

Meanwhile, Candice and Adam make a date to go to the car auctions.

We Are Two Ladies

Les is teaching Chesney the moral lessons contained in the Kenny Rogers classic 'Coward of the County.'

Cilla and Yana interupt as they're about to go shopping for a bridal dress. Yana needs the opinion of a red-blooded male: Chesney. She shows him some photos of bridesmaid's dresses.

'Which one of these would have you drooling and gagging to unzip me?' she asks.

They march off to try on their dresses (Yana's was lovely I must say) where the staff treat them like, oh I dunno, skanks.

Call Him Mr. Romance

Keith is telling Craig how he's looking forward to dating Audrey as it will be nice to get his hands in her stockings. Craig is taken aback but Keith says panty hose are ideal for storing onions.

He makes a date for 5:15 pm, that's 5:15 pm, with Audrey for dinner. She thinks it's a bit early but chalks it up to some exotic Yorkshire custom. She ends up arriving 45 minutes late and not at 5:15 pm so he rushes her off to the restaurant, only to find he has missed the early bird special. Audrey is famished and orders the most expensive things on the menu, much to tight-fisted Kieth's dismay.

Homeless, homeless. Moonlight sleeping on a midnight lake

Kelly and Lloyd enjoy a fancy date at Clock. Outside, a homeless woman rattles her tin can for change. Lloyd, feeling generous, gives her some money. The woman recognises Kelly.

'I see you got what you wanted, Kel.'

Kelly runs offs in tears. Lloyd calls after but she says she just has to go.

This is Not Uncomfortable at All

Charlie sits in on another Shelley-Zack session. Shelley talks about the humiliation of learning she's the second Mrs. Peter Barlow in front of everyone. Her biggest dream, and thing she most fears, is getting married.

Charlie then decides what better time, than right in the middle of a therapy session where deep-rooted issues are painfully sorted out, to pop the question.

Shelley can't believe it. Neither can Zack.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Claire is Not Pregnant

Remember when we all thought Claire was up the duff?

I made this but never got to use it:



Maybe someday...

Update: Episode 4: Sack Zack

What Doctor-Patient Confidentiality?

Charlie demands Zack tell him what Shelley said about him. He claims that they didn't discuss him at all, other than that Shelley said she was grateful for his help. He doesn't believe him.

Charlie then asks Shelley what they discussed. She tells him, to which he replies, "Well, you certainly have your stories straight."

Guilty conscience, Charlie?

He later learns through Violet and Jason that Zack is coming by at 7:00pm to drop off some tapes for Shelley. He decides that's when he'll "sack zack."

Unfortunately for Charlie, he's had one too many pints and nips off to the loo when Zack comes in. He waits for Zack come down and decides he'll fire him then. Upstairs Shelley tells Zack she's ready to take the trash out while people are around as part of the first step to her recovery.

Charlie spots Shelley coming down the stairs proudly taking the trash out. She is clearly pleased that she is making progress. Charlie is clearly displeased that he cannot fire Zack now as he's obviously having a good effect. Better watch out, Charlie. Today it's taking out the trash. Tomorrow it could be cleaning the toilet. Next thing you know, she's got opinions of her own again!

And Speaking of Setting Women Back 40 Years

Kelly is pleased to learn that Lloyd really, truly, owns half of Streetcars. This would make him a man with money in the bank and therefore, worthy of her time. Lloydie Warbucks agrees to buy her drink at the Rovers.

Meanwhile, Candice thinks Adam is a nerd. Audrey points that Adam is likely to inherit some of the Baldwin fortune and the factory and will be more posh than anyone else on the street. Candice tells Audrey that money isn't everything and if she wasn't interested in him before, she isn't going to be now. In fact, she says, the shallow pursuit of material goods is a driving force the disintegration of our civil society, something she has often decried.

Okay, seriously now. Candice suddenly thinks Adam is no longer a nerd.

Audrey: 'Forgive me for saying this Candice dear, but you really are dreadfully shallow.'

Candice: 'Thanks! I think that's why I'm so in touch with what the modern world is all about.'

Has he tried Monster.ca?

Norris asks Rita for a reference in his pursuit of a new career. She agrees, handing him a sealed envelope. He objects, citing she could have written anything. She says it's not for him, it's for his employer.

Later in the Rover's, Norris admits to 'accidently' opening his reference letter, found it lacking, and re-wrote it for Rita.

Mean Girls

Dr. Phil asks Gail why she wasn't speaking to him. She said it wasn't intentional, she was just having one of those days. Her invitation to tea is politely declined as he makes off for another home visit, Eileen's as it turns out.

Gail shakes her fist and yells across the road, 'Damn you, Grimshaw! Damn you all to Hell!'

Actually, she goes back to the medical centre and tells Donald that he's at Eileen's right now. The boss is again not interested until she points out that his appointment was with a Mr. S. Tully, not a Mrs. E. Rotten-Cowy-Tart. Donald says he'll have a word but asks if Gail is sure she's not personally involved in any of this.

'Quite sure, yes.' she replies.

Later at Eileen's, Phil is applying the hand-cuffs doing his patient's feet. They are chatting about rude people and Eileen points out how rude Gail is. But then, she adds, she's had a lot to contend with. What with Richard Hillman and all.

Suddenly Phil feels sorry for Gail, not the reaction Eileen wanted.

Later, she told Jason she was worried Phil would think Gail was the most interesting woman on Earth.

No, I don't think he'd ever think that.

Update: Episode 3: Fear and Driving

Dr. Finchy Arrives

Charlie tells Shelley he's booked an at-home appointment with a therapist. She wants Charlie to stay with her when he arrives.

Violet and Charlie discuss Shelley's situation. Charlie tells Violet that sometimes he checks his throat first thing in the morning to make sure it hasn't been cut in the night. Nice.

Later, Zack (Zak?) arrives. Charlie warns him Shelly is very disturbed, just like her mother. Charlie wants to stick around for the session but Zack asks him to leave for the initial consultation.

Zack asks Shelley about her situation. She says she feels frightened all the time.

Downstairs, Charlie fumes at Jason that Zack kicked him out and they're probably talking about him right now. Well, not just yet. It takes time to get at the root of the problem.

Charlie comes in on Shelly and Zack and lingers for a bit while they discuss her fears. Zack gives him the "PFO" look and he slumps off. Shelley then says she's afraid to leave her room because she thinks she'll make a fool out of herself. Zack suggests she try a simple task like taking out the trash and says he'll be by later on to drop off some tapes that may help her.

Charlie later demands of Zack tell him Shelley said about him.

Come on, Eileen

Eileen thinks Gail has the advantage in winning Phil's heart as she works with him. Sean says she just needs to take the initiative.

'Come on Eileen,' he says. 'You know how to pull a fella.'

They later see Phil outside loading some boxes into his car. Eileen suggest they may see each other in the Rovers sometime. Sean asks for a consultation of his own. Later in the Rovers (I need a macro that phrase), Sean said the consultation was a ruse just so he'd pop by hers again and she could have her wicked way with him.

Gails watches the events unfold and hatches her own plan. It will be devious. It will be dastardly. It will be small-minded and shrewish.

She tells Audrey that they're "at it again" and she's going to put a stop to it to and call Donald. No, Audrey, not Trump. No, Sarah-Lou, not Duck. Donald the Practice Manager.

She is true to her word and informs Donald that there are shenanagins afoot. He is less than interested.

Son, You're Going to Drive Me to Drinkin' if You Don't Stop Driving That Hot Rod Lincoln

Adam is taking his driving test with Penny as she doesn't yell at him as much. Mike has a conversation with Jamie about the importance of family. Mike later asks Penny if he should give Jamie a few quid now and again because he realises he's his grandson but can't as it would raise suspicions. I enjoy how the upper classes show love.

Later as Keith is getting his hair done by Audrey, Candice is doing Adams's hair. He talks about his driving test. She asks if he has a car and he says he does not. Candice says the girls he goes out with are probably used to that but as she is a local celebrity she couldn't been seen on the bus. People would think she's slumming or doing a reality TV show.

Meanwhile, Norris career search continues.

Update: Episode 2: Brazen Tarts and Common Trollops

She's a Hoo-ah!

Gail peaks through her net curtains and sees that Dr. Phil's Vauxhall has been parked in front of Eileen's, in the words of Lionel Ritchie, all night long. That can only mean that 1) he stayed the night, 2) they did it, and 3) Eileen ensured that he left the car outside just so Gail would know they did it.

Meanwhile, at Eileen's House of the Rising Sun, she and Sean are having a cup of tea. She says he did her feet and nothing else. Jason comes in a puts two and two together and figures Dr. Phil stayed the night as well. He is disgusted that a woman her age who behave in such a way and leaves.

Eileen informs Sean that he only left his car there so that Kevin could do his MOT but thinks it's fun to let Jason think his mum is an old tart.

Later, Jason finds Gail in the Kabin. Gail says she is always amazed by the Grimshaws: Jason trying it on with Gail, his brother's "antics," and now Eileen with the "pervert with a foot fetish."

Jason says he, too, is disgusted with his mother's actions, saying that Dr. Phil was still in bed when he left (Eileen told him she must have worn the good reflexologist out).

Later, in the Rovers, Eileen meets up with Dr. Phil, who has no clue he is the subject of such intense gossip right now. She cleverly susses out that he is single.

Gail comes in as Phil is showing Eileen various pressure points on her hand. Phil says hello but Gail gives him her back. He is confused, as she seemed very friendly before.

"It's her age. HRT. Hot, cold. Up, down. That's Gail."

Sarah wants to know why Gail cares so much. Because, Gail tells her, she wants some excitement in her life. She figures she should have appeared desperate like Eileen as that's what he obviously responds to. Gail, of course, has never appeared desperate.

Phil heads out, Gail ignores him.

The ensuing conversation is too good not to reprint ver batim (more or less):

Eileen: 'What's up? Jealous are you? I know you were lying when you said Phil couldn't fit me in. I bet you were pig sick when he did.'

Gail: 'I'm more amazed that anyone would go near your feet given the state of your net curtains.'

Eileen: 'He said my feet were wonderful. A joy to touch!'

Gail: 'At least I didn't have to pay.'

Eileen: 'At least I'm not a charity case.'

Gail: 'I bet you had to pay for extras. No man would spend the night with you without some form of compensation.'

Eileen: 'And the only thing a man ever seems to want to do with you is drive you into the canal!'

Gail: 'You only got interested in him because you knew I was.'

Eileen: 'Is it any wonder blokes run a mile with your track record?'

Gail: 'Have any of your kids 'seen' their fathers? I shudder to think what goes on under your roof. Strays and alley cats, someone needs to throw a bucket of water over you.'

The fight is then broken up. Sean declares Eileen the winner. As do we all.

Gail seethes at Sarah-Lou that if that "brazen tart" wants Dr. Phil, she's going to have to fight Gail for him.

RITA'S DEAD! SHE'S DEAD! SHE'S -- oh, wait.

Norris finds Rita slumped over and lifeless on the chesterfield. He returns to the Kabin in shock and tells Jack, Blanche, and Sally that she's dead. After much crying and hugging, they all pile into Rita's apartment to see the corpse.

Rita suddenly rises to life, to everyone's shock. Norris says he couldn't feel a pulse. Blanche retorts: 'I'm not surprised under all that make-up.' Rita asks Norris if he tried to give her the kiss of life. He looks away.

Later, Norris tells Rita if she died he'd have no job and no prospects. He asks for a partnership in the Kabin, which Rita refuses. He tells her he's going to look for another job.

Flavor of Love, Part Two

Keith and Audrey meet for their dinner date. Audrey is all dolled up for a evening sampling the culinary delights at ... the Rover's.

As Keith peruses the menu, Audrey says she's lost her appetite, until she realises she is the subject of some local gossip, vis a vis Blanche and Vera. She sticks her tongue out at them. Vera says she always thought she was a common trollop. Keith tells Audrey she reminds him of Grace Kelly, only before the accident. They have a good laugh and she suddenly gets her appetite back. The agree to a second date, but only if Audrey does his hair.

Update, Episode 1: Love, Feet, and Trainers

I actually hadn't seen the first episode of the Sunday omnibus as I was dropping off the parental units at the airport so I'm cheating a little bit by cribbing from the online updates for the first part.

Love Drag Us Down Where We Belong

After Tyrone and Frankie convince him, Jack admits he misses Vera. She's like smoking, he says. It isn't very good for you and costs a fortune but it's nigh impossible to give up. "Every man needs a drag in his life and mine's Vera!"

(I just want to point out it's my last day on the Patch so I know of what Jack speaks)

Jack finds Vera in Southport, after failing to find her in Blackpool. Jack remembers that Southport was the site of their pre-wedding dirty weekend and was the closest they ever came to a honeymoon. Their B&B, Vera recalls, was 'The Shangri-La,' which appealed to Vera because of the french name. They decide the find the place again and Jack suggests they check in under "Mr. and Mrs. Smith." Vera is delighted at Jack's kinky side. And so, the two are back together.

Better Shopping Through Guilt

Sophie guilts her parents into buying her the latest sneakers, saying they spend all their money on Rosie and her Orc Hill 'skewel.' It works.

Paging Dr. Phil

Gail lied to Eileen about Dr. Phil being all booked up when in fact, he had Gail booked that very evening. Eileen then got Phil to come round hers for another bout of footsie. Gail is consumed with squeaky voiced rage.

"I'll Take The Rapists for $200, Alex"

Charlie drags Shelley to the medical centre. Once there, the doctor asks Shelley about herself. Charlie answers for her mostly. She is prescribed some Happy Pills but it is suggested she would benefit from some therapy. Unfortunately, the next therapist will not be available for the next four to five weeks, due to waiting lists. Everyone in the UK is mad, it seems.

Flavor of Love

Keith asks Audrey out for a drink. She sees through his awkwardness and asks him out for dinner.

Idea from Lisa



Not strictly Corrie, but Lisa suggested having an 'Office' party and I'm thinking this is a great idea.

So any interest out there? Rumour has it that Mr. and Mrs. Shatnerian are coming to Toronto during the Jean Baptiste weekend - so what better time.

I could see if we can book the party room in my building.

Suggestions: costumes, office pranks, office snacks, David Brent dance off contest.

I'll come as the Welsh tart.

Any interest?

FYI - I've got a hella project in front of me right now and won't be able to get to the updates until Wednesday. If anyone wants to step up to the plate, feel free. I know it's a lot of ground to cover, so even if you want to do a bit that would be grand.

Line of the Week

"The only thing men want to do with you is drive you into the canal!"

-The awesome Eileen Grimshaw, to Gail Platt

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Glacia's Jumping Up and Down....

saying, 'Oh My God, oh my god, oh my god!'

Look who's Shell's new therapist.



Oh come on Charlie...this will just make matters worse.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Writers Needed



Do you live in the UK?

Would you like to contribute to the UK Corrie blog?

Well, today is your lucky, lucky day.

My UK Corrie Update peer, Glenda (Ghost of Corrie Future) contacted me (Ghost of Corrie Past) to send out a request for any UK fans who might be interested in contributing to their blog.

If this sounds like your cuppa, then you must clicky here.

Rumour has it that they're willing to pay a bob or two for your efforts.

(Is that right? 'Bob'? That's the correct British nomenclature for money, right? - Sorry, I'm just goofing with ya.)

Coronation Street PING – June 3, 2006



This announcement just in from our Deborah

You're invited to a
Coronation Street PING
June 3rd at 6pm

The Niblick
1011 Upper Middle Road (at 8th line)
Oakville, Ontario


All Corrie fans come and enjoy the evening’s activities which will include:

A game of Pingo
Corrie Trivia/games
A special Corrie video recently shown in the UK
An optional Corrie/British themed gift exchange
Prizes
Lots of Corrie chat and excellent food

To reserve your seat or more info email:
corriepings@hotmail.com
*spaces are filling quickly

Thursday, May 11, 2006

HP Sauce Goes Dutch



HP Sauce, Britain’s popular brown sauce condiment, will move production from the historic HP Foods factory at Aston in Birmingham to a plant in Holland.

Brownsauce.org discusses the Coronation Street / HP Sauce connection. (Includes a video clip of Danny and Leanne discussing brown sauce!)

An Amazing Feet Update



Okay - maybe that title was a bit week.

Get Your Phil
There's a sexy new man in town and he works as a reflexiologist at the clinic where Gayle works. She has her eyes on him and arranged for him to meet her at the Rovers for a drink.

Meanwhile, Eileen has tales of 'bumping' into a handsome new man in town and is all a glow and proclaims in the Rovers that she is in love. Unfortunately, she doubts she'll ever see him again.

It turns out she will see him again because he is...wait for it...the same gent that Gayle is chasing after and there he is in the Rovers! Oh no! This is really going to put a wedge between Gayle and Eileen's beautiful long standing friendship.

There's a lot of darts being shot back and forth between the two ladies, especially when Eileen comes into book a foot massage with Phil the Foot Guy.

BTW - why are all the sexy love interest either from Scotland or Ireland? What is it about the Celts?

Speaking of Irishmen
Sean is out on a date with Tim, only to be discovered by Tim's partner.

Yes, Tim was two-timing with Sean. So with a great deal of strength Sean breaks it off with Tim.

BTW - why do all sexy Irish love interests get shipped off the show as fast as they arrive?

How Do You Sign 'Norris is a Jerk'?
Norris went out of his way to let Freida, the niece, know that she was upsetting Emily and causing a lot of havoc in the household. This after Emily fell down the stairs and hurt her arm.

Freida took her cue and decided to head back home. Emily is suspicious that Norris sent her away, even though Freida denied it.

Emily really didn't want the niece to go because I think she liked the feeling of having family around and reminicsing about Ernest. She be pretty cross with Norris now.

Sophie's Choice
Sally and Kev had the heartbreaking job of telling Sophie that they couldn't afford to send her to Awk-hill like Rosie.

Sophie is over the MOON because she never wanted to go there in the first place.

In Other News

Lister and Kelly are dating.

Tyrone and Maria tried to make each other jealous, only to realize that they were too much in love for all that nonsense.

Boots for Liz McDonald



Giddyup.

Bob’s Mum


Evie Garratt

Bob’s mum. The woman who called Liz McDonald a low-rent floozie and asked if Bob found Liz at Rent-a-Tart.

If you’re a Little Britain fan, you’ll recognize Bob’s mum.

On Little Britain, teenage Jason (David Walliams) is head-over-heels in love with Gary's (Matt Lucas’) grandmother.

Gary’s nan, played by Evie Garratt, is the same actress who plays Bob’s mum on Corrie!

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

I'm Ready for My Update, Mr. DeMille



Liz had the pleasure of running into 'Bob' and his 'Mum' in the park by accident.

In the grand tradition of 'God-awful Corrie Mums', 'Bob's' 'Mum' takes one look at our Liz and calles her a tramp, a tart, a hussy, etc.

Bob apologizes to Liz and explains to her that 'Mum' is mentally ill. (Hands up how many people who have explained away some family members in this way!) Liz seems satisfied and is more excited when 'Bob' asks her to model for some photos he wants to take.

Okay - I have to admit I was watching this at 6:30 am recovering from post run drinks the night before - so I can't remember the exact way this came about but Liz seemed convinced that 'Bob' was going be Cecil Beaton to her Liz.





Liz gussies up and heads over to 'Bob's and is positioned over on the bed and all is good until, like a 70's cautionary movie about the evils of strangers with cameras, 'Bob' suggests that she remove her top.

Liz takes exception to this.

She takes even MORE exception to the saddle he pulls out of his closet in attempt to get her a photo over her wearing it.

Yeah... turns out he was talking about Helmut Newton...not Cecil Beaton.



Liz runs off to Bev's place to tell her tale of woe. LUCKILY, Bev had some booze and smokes on hand to help Liz calm down.

Bev has Liz call 'Bob' over to Bev's place in order to confront him. When he gets there, he tries to explain that the saddle pic is famous, but Liz will hear nothing of 'My Little Pony' and tells him that they've called the police to search his place for pornography.

He freaks out, which makes me worry, what DOES he have at his place?

At that point, the gals chuckle and say, 'Oh Bob, we were just joking.... you sicko.'

'Bob' calls them tarts and stomps off.

BTW - did anyone catch the comment Liz made when Ken suggested that she look up Cecil Beaton in the library?

Also, I just found out that I share my birthday with Glenda who does the updates over at Corrie Net. Cool.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

There's always a cat



That's the opening sequence I remember watching with my grandmother (and wishing she'd turn it over to cartoons or summat).

Update -Wee Bit at a Time


Okay - gonna have to update Sunday's episode a bit at a time.

Sunita/Dev
So the Alahans went for their first anagram - mamagram - telegram - myoldgram - to find out about the baby and discovered that .....they're having twins!

Woo Hoo! Mazel Tov!

They also got something called 'gazumped' when someone else outbid them on the dream home. Sunita was upset and decided to call the real estate agent and put in a higher bid. When Dev found out, he was pretty ticked and got her to call back and withdraw the offer. (I'm behind him on this one. Certainly, she needs to be part of it, but if he's the financial wiz in the family, she shouldn't go behind his back.)

Vera/Jack
Vera has left Jack for good. She heads off to the caravan and no amount of begging from Tyrone or Danny will get Jack to ask her to come home.

Shel/Charlie
Shel caught Charlie with another woman in the pub after hours.

So guess what happened? They fight, he leaves, she begs, he comes back. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Get a new storyline, my friends.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Milestone

Sometime this past weekend 'Corrie Canuck' had visitor number 125,000, which seems like a pretty impressive number for our friendly little blog.

Many thanks to all those who have visited the site and hopefully you'll keep coming back!

Sunday, May 07, 2006

25 Years of Coronation Street

Hey everyone. The unpacking is just about complete, the internets, they work again, and we are now firmly planted in our new abode in Lachine, QC.

While unpacking, I came across this book in a box belonging to the missus. It was put out by CBC Enterprises in 1985 to commerorate the 25th anniversary of Corrie. I don't have a scanner so I took some photos. The book includes the script for the first ever episode, a 1976 map of Weatherfield, cartoons, biographies, and a 25 year, month-by-month synopsis of the show's storylines from Ena Sharples' stroke to Alf Roberts offer to buy Hilda Ogden's house for 15,000 pounds.

In the back of the book are some photos of actors who have appeared on the show and have gone on to other things.

Here are two photos of actors you may recognise. I'll post the answers tomorrow in the comments section.


HINT: He played Colin Lomax, grandson of Ena Sharples and appeared in only one episode. He went on to greater fame in American television in the late 1960's.


HINT: He played Ron Jenkins. His greatest success came from playing an important historical figure. He is now a knight.

Have fun!

Friday, May 05, 2006

Frisky Fridays

Totty Alert!

From Pamer...something for the lads.




From Jacquleine...something for the lasses.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

AND WE MISS YOU PAMER!!!!

So I decided to google your name.







Wrestlemania?

You just let me know if I've gone too far, far too far.

Monday, May 01, 2006

'Go Get a Large Cuppa' Update


Okay - there's a lot.

Fizzy Water
Kirk goes away and leaves Maria in charge of the kennels. Fizz won't accept this, so it's decided that the both of them and Tyrone will take care of the dogs together.

Initially, Maria won't have anything to do with the dogs and leaves Fizz on her own. However, when she comes back to the Kennels and see that Fizz and Tyrone have the dogs out of the kennels, sleeping on the furniture, eating pizza, listening to Snoop Dog and day trading on the net, she flips out.

She puts on her Barbara Woodehouse hat and before you can say 'Walkies!' has the dogs and people on schedule.

Lloyd the Barber
Lloyd had a good day and a bad day.

Bad day? He asked Kelly out and she told him that she was out of his league. (She's gonna eat those words I predict.)

Good day? He found out that a) Dev needed money asap to buy his dream home and b) Fred was no longer interested in buying half of the streetcars.

So Lister was able to purchase Dev's half for 5,000 less than the asking price.

'Ere, wot's on the Kelly?
After she rejects Lloyd's advances, it turns out that our Kelly went on a date with Young Adam.

She lets all the factory know and takes advantage of the situation by having him buy rounds for her mates, fetching coffee for them at the factory, and bragging about how she's gonna marry him.

Both Danny and Mike both warn him about letting the workers walk all over him, which kind of goes in one ear and out the other. What does straighten him out is when he hears Kelly talk about how she's bored with him because he's too much of a pushover.

And she's out on her ass.

oops.

Bevvies
Beverly went to Fred to ask him to reconsider tossing Shel out on her ear. She is worried that if Shel loses the job, her and Charlie will move to parts unknown. Fred was pretty steadfast about not budging on that issue....but asks Bev to go to dinner with him anyway. He then offers Bev the manager position, but she turns it down.

They went out of din-din where Fred announces that he's changed his mind about Shel and tells Bev that he fancies her. It looks like the feeling might be mutual.

And btw - Bev looked AMAZING at dinner. Her hair is so much better straight.

Knock-knock..
Who's there? Liz on a date with 'Bob' meeting his teacher friends for the first time. After her initial concerns she was able to win them over with knock knock jokes, discussion of Keynesian economics and remembrances of her luncheons with the Lord Mountbatten

Stevo
Tracey goes into the Rovers to give Steve a hard time, but not before Deidre tells her that she she's her own worse enemy.

Tracey gives this some thought when she comes into the pub and Steve's mates (Kev, Martin and someone else...) start to tell her off about chasing Steve off from his pint. Steve ends up defending her as the mother to his child.

This warms Tracey's heart and she says that he can stay if he wants and he buys her a drink. They get very warm and friendly to the shock of both Liz and Deidre.

Then just when it's feeling very lovey dovey, Steve lets Tracey know that he hates her and that sex with Karen was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better than with her and he only slept with her because he felt sorry for her.

Tracey ups and smacks Steve, which gives him good reason to call the police over the assault. (The local constabulary must be LOVING these two at this point.) Tracey has to be removed kicking and screaming.

Deidre wonders why Tracey isn't 'normal'.

Don't work Diedre Hunt-Langton-Barlow-Rachid-Barlow-Trump-Gabor, it has nothing to do with the environment she grew up in.

In the end, Steve decides to go spend some time with Andy to get out of this twisted environment.

BTW - is Kev working out?

Tim Hortons
I took a 15 minute break and ran to the local Tims for a bagel and a can of coke.

Sahid sends his best to the Corrie group.

Emily's Niece
Emily's Niece sent a letter to let her know that she wanted to drop by for a visit.

Norris is worried that this will be a fake Niece only after Emily's vast fortune.

When it's discovered that Emily's Niece is deaf, Norris is relieved because deaf people are incapable of evil doings.

Dr. Phil Prevails
Frankie tells Vera that she read an article in a magazine that says it's healthy for a woman to get out her frustrations and express her anger and it's healthy for men to stay calm.

Vera and Jack are going to try a new routine in their marriage where Vera shouts (even though she thinks it's common) at Jack and he ignores her and does whatever the hell he wants.

Let's hope this new form of communication works out for them.

Keith, the Garden Gnome.
Keith has taken a strong interest in Gayle's garden and has been helping out and hanging around the Platt's home.

Everyone comes to the conclusion that Keith fancies Gayle and when she invites him to dinner with the family. Of course, the family bails in order to give Keith the chance to profess his love to Gayle.

From the world of 'who didn't see that one coming' - after Gayle embarrasses herself by telling Keith that while she's flatterd, she's not interested in him - Keith let's her know that he's actually interested in Audrey.

Last one, I promise.
Danny sends Jamie to the Netherlands and tells Frankie that he's got an overnight business deal in Glasgow.

Of course, this is just to get Leanne to their favorite hotel.

Frankie sees Leanne getting dressed up and into a cab and decides to follow her to the hotel. She gets into the hotel just to see Leanne go into an elevator. So Frankie calls Danny and asks him how one would get everyone in a hotel out of their rooms and into the lobby.

He tells her that he'd pull the fire alarm.

I don't' know which is dumber, that she couldn't figure this one out or that he didn't get suspicious.

Anyway, Frankie pulls the alarm and Danny sends Leanne down and tells her to 'think of something'.

Leanne does think of something and tells Frankie that she was there for a interview for a new nightclub. Then she has the good sense to ask Frankie what SHE'S doing there. Frankie has to think on her feet and tells her that she's meeting up with an old school chum.

And that, my lovelies, is that.