Saturday, November 11, 2006

Friday Update (Posted Saturday With Hangover and Fried Chicken)

Rita Searches for Her Cocoon

When Norris finds that the Kabin hasn’t yet been opened, he knocks on Rita’s front door. It takes her 10 years to undo the deadbolts and with bleary eyes she tells him she’ll be in later. She puts the finishing touches to her face, and then looks wistfully at an old picture of herself back in her song and dance days.

She heads to a place called “Sunnydale Retirement Community.” It’s one of those perfect, pre-fab ‘communities for active seniors’. Her tour guide implies it’s built to support her inevitable infirmity, which of course could be a good 20 years away, he says. She doesn’t look thrilled by the prospect. She notes there are alarm buttons all over the place. Just in case she needs help with a jar of pickles, she says wryly.

She thanks him for showing her around, saying, “it’s been really interesting,” as though she actually means it. Is there a move in Rita’s future?

Fred Searches for Bev

At the Rovers, Betty not so gently reminds Fred that he’s forgotten the chicken and mushroom pies. He’s about to go back and get them when the phone rings. It’s Bev. She’s been abandoned on a country road near Kettering, which, judging by the look on Fred’s face, isn’t very near.

But like a knight to the rescue, Fred jumps in the refrigerated van and one flat tire later, has Bev wrapped in his arms.

Gail Searches for Evidence

It takes every ounce of my will not to fast-forward through the Platt scenes. It starts out with Gail going through David’s school bag. He watches her from the stairs, making sure she’s well into it before asking what she thinks she’s doing. He shouts at her for not believing that he was only walking the dog.

Gail is shocked to learn that drugs. Are available. At school (pause to slap our collective hands to our foreheads). David accuses her of taking drugs and when she says, “I never!” proceeds to run circles around her, using big words to point out that alcohol and coffee are essentially drugs, too. “Now you’re just being clever,” she says. Scene ends with David’s classic, “I’m not schtew-pid.”

Cut to him being all puppy-dog innocent with the cops. He didn’t know there were drugs in Jo’s flat. Oh sure, he smelled something but he just thought she was having a morning joint with her coffee. No, he’d never have taken any. See, cuz he’s tried it (pause to register Gail’s ridiculous look of surprise) and it didn’t agree with him. And what will happen to Jo, and will he have to testify? The cops say likely not. Gail assures the officers David’s learned his lesson, that he is simply too trusting. I swear you can read the smirk in his eyes.

Later at Craig’s (can someone tell me why these two hang out? It’s like the writers were desperate for a confidant for David and by default of age, it’s Craig), David fills him in. The implication is that David knew full well what was going on and he even watered the plants for her. When Craig asks if he got any of the pot, David replies with a sneering, “what do you think?” Then he talks about how he can’t wait to get away from his ‘thick’ family. He wants to go to America.

Emily Searches Her Soul

In one of the most touching and smart story lines of the season, Emily continues to struggle with her faith. Betty, ready to kick ass, is all “an eye for an eye". Emily wonders what Ernest would do. She thinks he’d likely forgive and be glad Ed found God. But Emily can’t find it in herself. She doesn’t want to go to church because the vicar would likely challenge her to forgive. She only feels an unwavering hatred for Ed. With deep sadness, she realizes that she’s not the great Christian she always thought she was.

Eileen Discovers the Real Ed

Ed finally calls. Eileen joins him at the Weatherfield Arms where she catches the barmaid’s attention by loudly referring to him as a murderer. They move to a more discrete corner. He says he didn’t tell her about it because he needed to tell Emily first. He wanted Emily to get to know him as a decent, normal guy. Eileen says that as crazy as she might be, she does want to try to understand him.

He tells her the story of how he murdered Ernest. He and his friend were made redundant and there was no work to be found. They cooked up the scheme to relieve the factory clerk, Ernest, of the week’s wages. Get in, take the money, get out. But it all went wrong. They never meant to hurt anyone. He saw Emily at the trial and he never forgot her. It took him a long time to admit his share of the blame. He was in prison for eighteen, lonely years. And while he never went in for “do-gooders and bible bashers”, he found he couldn’t escape God.

Eileen wishes he had told her sooner. He points out there is no good time for this sort of thing. He doesn’t regret sleeping with her. He would have only done that with someone he loves and with whom he sees a future. However, he would understand if she just walked away….


Anonymous said...

Excellent update, I agree with you "how thick is Gail, shocked that drugs could be purchased at school?"

Maude_Lynn said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Maude_Lynn said...

Argh, is it just me, or does anyone else wonder why oh why the Platt family were ever pulled from the canal?

(London) Rob said...

According to the Automobile Association route planner, the driving time between Manchester and Kettering is close to 2 and 1/2 hours.

That's not counting the time to change the flat tyre (note British spelling), and for pee stops (at least 2 for a man Fred's age)...

...aaaaand you could probably add another 30 minutes since Fred is driving a butcher's van (the Batmobile being in the shop for it's bi-monthly tune-up)...

So I figure that our Bev was standing there, I say standing there, like the house by the side of the road for at least 4 and 1/2 hours.

And even that's conservative considering the scant details that she gave Fred of her location "somewhere near Kettering"...

missusmac said...

Four and half hours? But Bev's hair still looked excellent!

And Gail never did drugs? Then what is the possible explanation for her being so out of it when it comes to her kids?

Rita's possible new home actually looked quite nice to me. But I don't want her to leave the street. Waaahhh!

This might be really obscure, but since she lives and owns the space above Kev's garage, would Kevin rent the garage space from her?

Loved that Craig wouldn't discuss Rosie with David. Funny, who seems the nicer kid -- the one with makeup, finger polish and heavy jewelery whose family all got tied up in murder, or the clean cut kid in the school uniform whose family everyone just wants to murder?

tanzie said...

Good point missusmac about David and Craig. Sitting here nodding my head in agreement!

Rob Swizzle said...

Even a car full of carbon monoxide and a canal can't kill the Platts. They're invincible. I think they have a "free gift with five stamps" card from Weatherfield Emergency.

Anonymous said...


Re: Rita. I know. I'm hoping against hope that she's just checking her options, and that she will recover her former feistiness soon. I DON'T want her to leave!

Re: Craig. Couldn't agree more. He was a perfect gentleman, refusing to discuss his gothlady with David (which showed much more maturity than most teenaged boys, if I remember correctly from HS).

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...


Way to do the research - I was wondering about that too, but too lazy to pull out a map and look.

And I'm sorry - the whole "we're having a fight so get out of my car" thing is SO immature! Bev (and I would assume her fella) are too old to play that game, aren't they? I mean, any guy that would do that at 25 is a loser jerk. Any guy that would do it at 50+ is an unbelievable loser jerk. Way to pick 'em, Bev!

And can I just say - if it's "3 to Kettering" and I'm presuming 3 = Km, not miles, since this is the UK, not the USA, why didn't she just WALK to Kettering? I mean, perhaps it isn't a grand metropolis, but they might perchance have had a teashop or a pub, or somewhere where she could sit down and be warm! She'd rather stand around in the cold for 4+ hours?!?!

As Bugs Bunny would say, "What a maroon!"

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...

Re: The Platts

OK, Gail is an idiot. She had the right idea at first, but then launched into the concept of Jo being distantly related to the Godfather, since she clearly whacked David for ratting her out.

And who could possibly be shocked that kids have access to drugs at school? Come ON! Idiot!

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...

Britain, being the fully 'metric' country that it is, still measures distances in Miles.

Even so, 3 miles really isn't that far to walk if the alternative is to stand at the side of the road in the middle of no-where.

Anonymous said...


To: David Platt
From: The USA

While we are flattered that you want to come to America, we feel that we are being used by you. You don't love us; you only love your idea of us. You haven't seen us at 6 am on a Monday, for instance.

Also, you love the idea of being a zillion miles away from your insane family. The need for a buffer zone, especially from wacky parents, is a well-established one, and we appreciate that your mum definitely qualifies you for some serious bufferage. However, you have shown no actual interest in us as a country. You don't seem to care that we wanted to go for Thai food; you were in the mood for KFC, and that was all there was to THAT. Plus you never call us and you don't want to meet our family.

While we have been known to date bad boys before, we are full to capacity with sociopaths right now, and our therapist assures us that we will never have the relationship we deserve unless we learn boundaries.

Please choose another country to treat like crap.

Thank you.

Anonymous said...


Really? So we're not the only holdouts? Well...I feel slightly deflated. I was walking around feeling like Gary Cooper in High Noon - the only man in town strong enough to stand up to the tyranny of metricness. "One day, this insanity shall pass, and the world shall return to the time-honored system of inches, feet and miles."

Oh well. Still, Bev could walk 3 miles - you're right!

Michigander Fan

John said...

I think the UK has the USA beat in stubborn adherence to the quaintly antiquated imperial system. They weigh people in the completely random measurement of "stones."

People! Units of ten! Why does this make people's heads explode?

In Scotland, I once asked an old lady how many kilometres it was to Roslyn Chapel and she started screaming "WIIIITCCHH!!!"

Anonymous said...


Because it's NEW and DIFFERENT. We fear change. Change is bad. Things must be the Way They Always Were.

Seriously, I learned the metric system in elementary school (this was in the 70s somewhere) and the teacher explained that we were going to be switching over to metric ANY DAY NOW. Yes, one morning we were all going to wake up and not be able to function because we didn't know The System.

I felt then, as I do now, that the metric system was invented by people with polyester plaid bell bottoms, sideburns and a pornostache, and I refuse to take seriously anything which I associate with The Gong Show.

We will prevail, and sanity will return, when one day, the world once again measures things in eighths instead of tenths.

Also, did you turn her into a newt?

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...

Pornostache! Awesome.

Just be glad that the UK doesn't use Pounds, shillings, and pence any more. My Mum tried to explain it to me once. It made my brain hurt.

P.S. John. Stones are a PERFECT way to measure weight. Smaller numbers make me feel skinny. (1 Stone = 14 pounds)

Anonymous said...


Thank you for the response. I'll be here all week. Bahdumpum.

Michigander Fan

Rob Swizzle said...

Love those anonymous memos that keep appearing!

Debbie said...

I have never thought about the Craig/David friendship before today. It has to be age and proximity. That also explains the Sophie Webster/Chesney Battersby-Brown friendship.

Debbie said...

I also want to say that the Emily storyline is a good one. However, with each passing soliliquy while she looks off into the distance she irritates me more and more.

Anonymous said...

Rob Swizzle,

Sorry, that was me - I forgot to sign my name. The moment the word "America" came out of David's mouth, I just knew I had to respond.

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...

Oh, and apropos of nothing...someone asked a couple of weeks back about Charlie Stubbs having children.

My Canadian Source is funneling me the Corrie Secrets/More Corrie Secrets DVDs from (one at a time). I watched the first one last night, and they interviewed Bill Ward (Charlie) in the "Hunks" section. (I don't know - it wasn't my decision to include him.) Anyway, during the interview, he is talking about his sort of father-son relationship with Jason Grimshaw, and he mentions that Charlie has a 16-yr-old son named Jake, who he never sees. So I thought I'd report THAT tidbit for everyone's benefit.

Michigander Fan

Anonymous said...

Just one more thing - also on the first DVD was a section on Love Cheats which featured Dev Alahan extensively. Wow. So...he used to be kind of cute, and very much the ladykiller, apparently.

Which begs the question: What the Hell Happened? (or, more specifically: Are they doing that to his hair on purpose?)

Michigander Fan

missusmac said...

Thank you Debbie! Each time Emily stares angrily off into the distance, I wonder if she's actually looking for cue cards. Why can't she look at the person she's actually talking to?!?!?!

Also, where the hell did all these pictures of Ernest come from in the dining room? I wouldn't have known what he looked like until Tiny Vi posted the Youtube shooting clip.

Until last week...all she had on the sideboard was the picture of Spider!

Anonymous said...

I am confused...didn't the Platts including David go to Florida which is in America?? How can David say that if they all went there in an old episode I vaguley remember??? LOL
The other Michigan Lady

Anonymous said...

Awww, cut Emily some slack - she is eleventy-three, after all. I'll be lucky if I'm not drooling on myself by that point, and she's still up and acting. Betty was telling a story on the Corrie Secrets DVD about how, toward the end, the actress who played Annie Walker was pinning scripts to everything just to get through scenes.

Michigander Fan

Debbie said...

I saw that episode of Corrie Secrets. The difference is that the woman who played Annie Walker wasn't irritating.

I gotta say that Emily's performance is right up there with Our Katie Harris'

Rob Swizzle said...

Craig/David: In England, shared willingness to kick a ball against a garage door is grounds for a friendship.

I don't think David and Rosie are * just * bratty teenagers. Living with the Street's most selfish mums is sure to do some longterm damage as the kids start clueing in.

Debbie said...

I don't think Rosie is bratty at all. She is a smart teenager. She could be much worse than she is. In the Webster family it is Sophie we have to watch out for.