Saturday, September 30, 2006

The I Hate Mondays Update

Kind of a painful post to do when you're all TGIFF.

Tell me why
I don’t like Mondays
Tell me why
I don’t like Mondays
Tell me why
I don’t like Mondays
I want to shoot…the whole day down

Gail hates Mondays and this one’s turning out to be extra pleasant, thanks to David. He couldn’t wash his hair because Phil was in the bathroom. He can’t eat his cereal because it’s made in Scotland, which is where Phil is from. And he certainly can’t wipe that foul look off his face because Phil is in the vicinity, breathing air.

At the shop, Dev is trying to restock shelves. He appears to seriously need his first coffee or a strong blow to the head as Amber is all talk-talk-talk. She doesn’t want to help out behind the counter like some Asian stereotype, she’s mad he doesn’t know her birthday, she would never buy him a present, she wants to be a fashion designer, her favourite subject is boys, and fine she’ll help out at the shop but he can just forget that minimum wage rubbish.

Out in the street, Amber tries to tell Sunita how much Dev’s been pining (and I thought she said she’d never get him anything!). Sunita doesn’t care one lick to hear it, though. She doesn’t want any of Dev’s help getting a double pram up the stairs, either. I think she’s missing a great opportunity. Make him your whipping boy, Sunita! That’ll learn ‘im.

Mondays are Blanche’s power days. She has things to do. Keith’s walking around delivering papers anyway so it makes perfect sense to her that he should walk the dog. He balks so she plays the broken hip card and off he goes, grumbling in his Keith-like way, dragging little Eckles.

Later, he is none too pleased to find Blanche enjoying herself at the salon. How could she just abandon a little dog, you ask? Perhaps because she’s the ghost of Tracy Future.

Craig and Rosie snatch a secret kiss in the alley and make plans to meet up after school at his house. Those two ought not tempt the Monday Gods, who can be particularly nasty.

Adam is taking leave of the factory. Danny laughs that if this is some sort of tactic to get Mike crawling after him, it’s not going to work because Adam’s not a woman. Adam warns Danny to stop manipulating “me dah”. Danny says Mike’s his Dad, too, suggesting, “I’ll do what I want,” then makes a crack about Adam’s accent being in incomprehensible. Adam says Danny has not seen the last of him. Danny warns him to keep looking over his shoulder.

Oh, and Ken’s pissed at Mike for chasing away his grandson. At the Rover’s, he has to remind Mike why Adam’s left and just how hard it’s going to be to get him back. Mike plays along, though he’s clearly confused about everything.

At the garage, Tyrone tells Molly about a “Surprise the Bride” competition advertised in the paper. Molly helps him fill out the form, but Tyrone struggles to find words to describe his feelings for Maria. Right. She’s beautiful. Got that. Could it be that Maria’s not going to win Girlfriend of the Year?

Well, at the Salon Maria is bashing Tyrone’s hairiness, so probably not. Audrey, Shelley and Sarah roll their eyes when Maria admits she only gave him a 20-quid voucher for Christmas when he had bought her loads in turn. Shelley says she always gave too much to the blokes in her life and was usually left with nothing.

Maria gets it. Sort of. You think she’s going to treat Tyrone right for once when she pulls him into the candlelit salon and tells him to strip. Oh, the eager, happy look on the poor boy’s face as he kicks off his pants (socks first next time, Tyrone)! Unfortunately, he doesn’t recognize the bowl of hot wax that Maria is mixing up.

Back at the Platt’s, you can practically see Phil’s brain working out how to broach the David subject. Rrrright, start wi’ me own moom. He tells Gail about how his mum used to cuff him when he got out of line. Gail is shocked and appalled, so Phil shifts the focus. He says just doesn’t want to see Gail disrespected. Gail reassures him that she’s been through it before with Sarah and Nick and it’s no big deal.

If I were Phil, I’d be having the conversation with Gail that goes, “look, lady, I’m on the verrrrge of leaving you and yer son is the very cause.” Instead, when Gail runs to fetch her precious son’s precious chips, Phil grabs David by the collar and shoves him up against the wall. That'll go over real well with Mother Hen.

It's just another manic Monday
I wish it was Sunday
'Cause that's my funday
My I don't have to runday
It's just another manic Monday

The End.


nwtrunner said...

Hey Jackie and Corrie Canuckers

Finally figured out how to post comments on this site after having been a reader for the last month or so.

The story lines right now are pretty compelling, but had to laugh at the comments earlier about "Scottish parenting" - having been the recipient of said same. Let's just say that young David P. would not last too long in your average Glesga household!

I used to like David. Now Rosie and Craig are much more likeable young folk. Along with wee Chesney, of course.

Love this site Jackie and the summaries - glad to have stumbled upon it! Enjoy reading the comments from others too.

Jacqueline said...

RE: Scottish parenting, "Did I call that?"

Thanks for the lovely comments NWT.

Rob said...

I guess I missed the 'hairiness'conversation, so I didn't realize what is in store for poor, naive Tyrone - I thought it was a bowl of personal lubricant...

Quite the loving looks that Molly was giving Tyrone huh?

And that was quite the little car that Adam was driving home tae Scotland in...anyone know what it was?

Anonymous said...

Same question for me, what the hell is that car of Adam's? Looks like something Austin Powers would drive in the future.


S. Poole

Anonymous said...

I never realised how cute Molly is. I was always angry at her for trying to get between Kirkeh and Fiz.

papasmurf said...

The car Adam drives is a Lotus - I think the model is the Elise. It was a gift from Mike after he got his driver's permit, and after his 500 quid car courtesy of Ken had a meltdown.

Peter said...

It somehow seems so perfect that Mondays would be Blanche's "power days" doesn't it? Whilst others can't stand it, she's a gran with a plan!